Everyday until December 21, 2012 we will count down to the end with a sign of the apocalypse. It’s like that movie The Number 23 (except actually good), once you see the signs – they’re everywhere! [These are just jokes, folks!]
There are rumors floating around the Multiverse that Rihanna has asked for time off to have Chris Brown‘s baby. The couple are also rumored to be planning a secret New Years Eve wedding. Will their offspring be a devil spawn genetically designed to make Chart Topping Hits? Was it hand crafted by Beelzebub to become the antithesis of Our Lord & Savior Blue Ivy Carter? Will there be an epic battle between Good and Evil that can only be resolved by dancing baby knife fights? We’ll find out on December 21st. How will Rihanna give birth so soon? According to Television (which means it’s true) devil babies always get born only a few days after conception.
Trustworthy news source Entertainment Wise reports, “She asked her record company when the best time would be for her to take off, as she wants a baby,” an insider revealed to Closer. They just stared at her. Everyone was pretty open-mouthed. But she hasn’t got any time free in her diary until 2014.”
Must be 100% true then. Le apocalypse approaches. We imagine it will go down like this:
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