Unless you’ve been living in a cave for the past month, you probably know what Snap Chat is. However, if you are one of the few people that hasn’t heard of this special app, I’ll break it down for you. You can take a picture and then send it to any one else that has Snap Chat for an allotted amount of time. It ranges from three seconds to 10 seconds. After that the picture disappears forever. The receiver can’t reopen it and the sender can’t reopen it, and if the receiver tries to take a screen shot of the picture it will let you know! Mostly, I send drunk pictures to my sister and I doodle on them. It’s like a fun game of her trying to piece together my night since she recently moved to Houston and I miss her a lot. (Editor’s Note: Awwww.)
The other thing I imagine Snap Chat was actually invented for is sexting. You can go ahead and send your guy a picture of your girls without fear of repercussion, because he obviously can’t keep the picture and then put it on the internet later for embarrassment when you’re famous. He can go ahead and send that dick pic because I’m not going to have time to show my girlfriends your junk and giggle about it. It’s created a whole new world for sexting, and I hate it.
Let’s wander back to the ice age, you know, before Snap Chat, when all we had was stupid smart phones to keep our dirty minds occupied, shall we? I’m not afraid to admit it, I sent some dirty text messages. Typically, I wouldn’t be sitting around just showered in only a t-shirt, like I would describe in detail to my male counterpart. More often than not I was sitting on my couch, eating Ramen, and wearing sweats. I probably wasn’t getting myself off, and I definitely still had clothes on. So when you would ask me to send a picture, I would sigh and come up with a reason not to. My reason? I didn’t trust the picture wouldn’t leak somehow. SNAP CHAT TOTALLY MAKES THIS EXCUSE NOT AN OPTION AND I HATE IT. I hate the effort it would require for me to send my boobs to someone. I mean, I’d have to take off my shirt and bra and then find a flattering angle. It’s just a lot of work.
Furthermore, I understand why guys would want a picture of a naked girl. It’s sexy. We have a nice naked body. If I wanted a picture to turn me on you know what it wouldn’t be? A dick pic. I would want a shirtless guy, flexing and looking like he just got done doing something rugged. I don’t want to see your penis. My scandalous text messages are also not an invitation to Penis Town, where your hard member is the mayor. Peen-eye are nice, in the moment, but in picture form they are just not as enticing. Like, I might be alone here, but I have never seen a picture of an erect penis and thought, “Man! I really want that in me.” I’m always just kind of like, “Oh, there’s a penis.” So as a PSA from all ladies, unless we explicitly say, “EMERGENCY: SEND NUDES!” we’re probably not excited about your penis.
Snap chat is a life ruin-er, because not only am I out of reasons not to send pictures, you crazy boys have found more reasons to send dick pics. Thankfully, these ones erase, because seeing it once is usually more than enough.
Molly is a senior English/Journalism/Broadcasting major who makes awkward noises in awkward situations. She is obsessed with Chandler Bing and English Bulldogs and is really bad at high fives. Follow her on twitter @gwacamolly or on tumblr at gwacamolly.tumblr.com