How To Deal When Your Friends Don’t Like Your Boyfriend
Celebrities are just like us! They have fallouts too. Katy Perry and Rihanna used to be BFFs. Like had slumber parties BFFs. Like had matching half-heart necklaces BFFs. Like had matching tattoos BFFs. They were the pop star versions of you and your other half. But since RiRi got back together with douche of the decade, Chris Brown, she and Katy Perry are barely speaking.
This is a typical “best friend hates boyfriend” situation. Except the boyfriend beat the crap out of the friend, so there’s that. I’m not going to get into the whole Rihanna-Breezy thing because quite frankly it makes me nauseous, and it kind of hurts my soul. But this is about what to do when your friends hate your boyfriend. It happens all the time, but you could be blind to it if you like totally love your boyfriend. I’ve been on both sides of the spectrum, and it’s never fun.
I dated a guy throughout college who I thought was just the best thing since sliced bread, and he was for a while. They he became a complete and utter jerk and a bad excuse for a boyfriend, but I was stuck and didn’t want to end it because I didn’t want to be alone. Well, my friends hated this guy so much to the point where I couldn’t hang out with my friends and my boyfriend at the same time. It was actually really depressing, now that I look back. They were generally supportive though and pulled the, “If you’re happy, that’s what matters” card, but there were also those times where they told me exactly how they felt. Like, “Caitlin, your boyfriend is an ass. What are you doing?” I felt as if I had to prove that he was great, and we were perfect together.
Well, you shouldn’t have to find ways to prove to your friends that your boyfriend is a good guy. That should be apparent to them. If they don’t like your boyfriend, there might be a valid reason why. Whether your BFF gets weird vibes around him or has actual proof of him sucking, your BFF isn’t saying this to hurt you. She’s being protective because she loves you so hard. And she’ll always love you even when you date a jerk, and she’ll be there for you if/when it doesn’t work out.
When my relationship didn’t work out, my friends were all there for me. I wasn’t even really upset at that point because I had like Katie Holmes-style calculated my breakup, but I had alienated many of my close friends for two years. I had a lot of rebuilding to do, and I felt like a jerk because I didn’t listen to my friends.
Now, I’m not saying to break up with your boyfriend if your friends don’t like him. However, if it’s a recurring theme, your friends might be onto something. Your friends know that you’re going to do what you want because it’s your life. And if your boyfriend is making you happy, they get it. They understand you make decisions for yourself. But don’t shut yourself off from them because that’s when things get ugly.
If your friends hate your boyfriend, talk to them about it. It could be that you only complain to them about your boyfriend. If they never hear anything positive, well no wonder they don’t like him! It could also be a situation where your friends are single, and they’re jealous of your relationship. Or maybe he does suck, then you should still talk about it. Listen to what they have to say. If you don’t agree and you’re really happy, that’s alright. Explain that you understand their opinions, but you’re happy with your boo and you hope you can all just get along. Really. They want you to be happy, and if you truly are, they’ll bite their tongues. They may not want to be around your beau, but that’s fair.
The truth is, not all of your friends will like your boyfriend. And your boyfriend probably isn’t going to like all of your friends. This is okay, but the key is to make sure you are still a good friend in the process. Don’t abandon your friends for a boyfriend. Hos before bros. Uteruses before duderuses.
Caitlin is a graduate of the University of Alabama who has an obsession with cupcakes, coffee, and Harry Potter. She always has random fun facts and is now living and adventuring in New York City. Follow her fabulous life @caitlincorsetti. You’re welcome!
[Lead image via Getty on Huffington Post]