Mean Girls could be getting the musical treatment according to Tina Fey. “Maybe! We want to. I would love to,” Tina Fey told E! News on the red carpet at the SAG Awards. “I’m trying to develop it with my husband, who does all the music for 30 Rock and I think Paramount’s onboard.”
We can’t imagine how such a quote-worthy movie would translate into a broadway musical. Would each lovable quote be transformed into a musical number. An entire ballad called, “And None For Gretchen Weiners” would be flawless. With expectations so high we demand nothing but a star-studded cast of musical powerhouses. Sort of. I think it would be pretty impossible for any actor/singer to fill the shoes of this unforgettable cast. They’d have to take on each character and make it their own. Thus I present you with the most absurd Mean Girls: The Musical cast, ever. I mean, it would have to be a bit ridiculous because if any new actors took themselves too seriously and tried to be the “new Regina George” it would simply be a travesty.
Mariah Carey as Cady Heron
She may not be the best actress or even an OK one but can you imagine the ballad of “She Took Him Back – Regina Took Aaron Back!!!”?
Britney Spears as Karen Smith
No explanation needed here. The sexy, electronic dance track about the difference between your “cousins” and your “first cousins” will be a top charting single.
Katy Perry as Gretchen Weiners
I am pretty sure Katy Perry is the very definition of “Fetch.” People just keep trying to make her happen. Besides, when you’re the only one who knows about Regina’s nose job you can start feeling like a plastic bag right quick.
Rihanna as Regina George
No one can throw shade as expertly as Regina George, except for maybe Rihanna. Her IDGAF attitude on social media, a long with her sugary, sweet persona in interviews makes for the perfect Machiavellian Regina.
Frank Ocean as Aaron Samuels
He looks sexy with his hair pushed back. Don’t you think he looks sexy with his hair pushed back?
Evil Taylor Swift as Janis Ian
Taylor Swift would just love, love, love to not play the “mean, popular girl,” which is evident in how she casts herself in all her music videos. Unfortunately, in real life, her reputation is quite the opposite of the image she tries to uphold. She’ll totally over-act the role of Janis Ian and it will be a train wreck we’ll love to watch. No one is going to buy her rock and roll version of “Regina George’s Army of Skanks.”
Alexander Skarsgard as Damien
Because it makes no sense but would be perfect in every single way.