I love condoms. Sometimes I feel alone in this, because a lot of people who commit to using condoms regularly always seem to do so with reluctance and resignation. I, on the other hand, am always thrilled to purchase and use them. Neither I, nor my partner, find them uncomfortable and I don’t believe our sex life suffers from using them. There was a study that indicates condoms are not an impediment to having pleasurable sex. Amen, I feel vindicated.
I don’t doubt that condoms can be very uncomfortable for a myriad of reasons – allergies and an improper fit chief among them. Not all condoms are created equal, and the differences are more than just “regular” and “magnum” sized. Then you have to decide whether you want thin, her pleasure, with spermicide, ribbed, extra lubricated, etc. Condoms are a lot like jeans – there is no one style that fits all and it’s almost criminal how difficult it can be to find the perfect fit. In my perfect world, condoms would be totally free of charge or deeply discounted so there would be no financial disincentive to experiment and find the ones that are most comfortable.
In my humble opinion, condoms that are compatible with both partners’ bodies are a total non-issue during sex. They shouldn’t bunch up or feel hard, cause itching or break. Nor do they interfere with intimacy. It only takes a few seconds to put one on (hello, anticipation buildup) and in the throes of the act, you shouldn’t even notice it. The only mildly disgusting thing I associate with them is the process of cleaning off lube after the fact. There’s no wet spot to be concerned about, and even though I’m in a monogamous relationship, I still like knowing that I’m protected against most STDs.
While there are plenty of valid reasons to forgo condoms, they don’t deserve the negative reputation they have for being sex-ruiners. With the right kind, condoms should not be a hindrance to a good time. They’re especially amazing if you’re into casual/non-exclusive sex, you want a tangible form of birth control, or if you only want to use contraceptives when you’re sexually active instead of continuously. Let’s stop demonizing condoms and focus on the real enemies of good sex, like selfish partners and roommates who refuse to vacate the premises.
[Lead image via Camilo Torres/Shutterstock]