On Dating While Living at Home and Not Meeting Anyone Worthwhile [Dear DBN]
In the textbook of life, love takes up at least a third of the pages. And while that textbook doesn’t tangibly exist, a solid two-thirds of literature cover the subject of love anyway. This week, when things seem desperate, it’s important to step outside your own circumstance and remember that literally everyone relates. Sometimes, you just need to breathe and have a little faith.
How would you approach dating while still living with parents? I’m going on 25, in an enormous amount of debt from getting my master’s degree, and not sure when I’ll have enough to stay afloat on my own. Although I feel ready to jump into the dating scene, I feel like I can’t because of this baggage I call being a child and living at home.
That baggage is called coming of age in the recession – more than enough of us can relate to your plight. And while living at home may be a hindrance, having a master’s degree certainly isn’t. Do you really want to date someone who would chastise the responsible decision to live at home while finishing your education? Teenagers found a way to date while living at home – you can, too.
Put yourself out there, and bring your life plan with you when you do. When someone asks about your situation, you can tell them the truth: you’re living at home while you finish your education so it’s easier to get on your feet when you do… and what a truly lucky person you are to have that option. Haters be damned.
I’m not meeting anyone worthwhile. Am I the problem?
Careful with your phrasing there. Are you not meeting anyone worthwhile? Or are you just not meeting the love of your life? Are you unwilling to compromise? Or are you unwilling to give people a chance? No one ever said dating was easy. As a matter of fact, most people have said it’s impossible, frustrating, and riddled with rules that confuse everyone. It’s basically social calculus. And like high school math, none of us really want to learn, we just want the A+.
So I’ll recommend what my parents used to recommend to me when I got frustrated – take a break. It used to mean go run around outside, have a snack, watch some TV… but let it mean something a little bigger to you. ‘Cause you very well might the problem, and not that you’re picky or difficult, but that like so many of us, you’re frustrated and tired and over it. So take a break. Hang out with you friends, work out, learn to cook a few new recipes, paint something totally ugly, and when your mind has cleared, try the problem one more time.