We brought you the The Broke Girl’s Guide To Drinking On The Cheap, now we’re here to give you a list of the finest wines—lol—money can buy. And by money we mean the $8 in nickels and dimes you found rummaging in the couch and old pants pockets. Is there anything better than finding money in an old purse? Here is our “Best Of” the cheapest wines that aren’t too offensive.
Here are a few tips: Cheap white wine tastes better than cheap red wine. Malbecs and Merlots basically tastes the same. Prosecco is the cheapest kind of sparkling wine, no need to shell out for Chardonnay. Wine is low in carbs with 1 to 4 grams of carbs per glass, it’s also gluten-free, making it great for health nuts.
Three Buck Chuck $3
If you have access to Trader Joe’s Wine, then what are you doing? Go there. Go there all of the time because you probably won’t find a better deal. Charles Shaw or ole Chuck only costs 3 bucks (formerly $1.99 but what are you going to do?) and is available in both red and white. Good enough. Yes, good enough. This is great for casual hangouts with the girls.
Boone’s Farm $2.79-$3.99
What even is Boone’s Farm? IDK, bb. IDK. What I do know is that if you don’t like the actual taste of wine and don’t mind a slight sugar rush, Boone’s Farm is for you. Do not show up to a get together with some Boone’s Farm unless you are being ironic. This is not a “nice gift” for the party’s host. This is a beverage you pre-game or keep to your lonesome. This is the, “Girl, why you drinking that?!” of wine’s. OK? Watch Sex and The City and weep to while drinking this fruity mess of fancy.
Yellow Tail $7-8
Yellow Tail is a “pricier wine.” If you’re looking for good cheap RED wine this is where you should start. If you roll up with one of these to the party no one is going to be throwing shade. Plus, the bottles are kind of chic.
For Your Fizzy Needs: Cupcake Prosecco $8
A sparkling wine always feels luxurious. It’s like drinking wine and soda. Very high class. Prosecco is always cheaper than champagne so why splurge when there is a celebration. Truthfully I think it tastes better too.
Bulk Red: Carlo Rossi $5.50-$12.99
Carlo Rossi comes in a big ole jug and is a decent red wine to drink in bulk. It’s great for casual parties or large get-togethers. The price ranges massively from location to location but, hey, in NYC $12.99 is cheap for 1.5 liters of wine.
Bulk White: Franzia $4.99-$7.99
Wine from a box, the classiest wine of them all. Very bourgeoisie. FIVE liters of delicious, delicious white wine for less than $10. Who knew? This is great for beer and wine parties with more than 10 guests. Franzia has a range of reds, whites and pinks but we think the white is most preferable. Not that this needs to be said but a giant box of wine isn’t necessarily the best gift for a party hostess but if you’re helping to organize a party then it’s totally cool.