As ridiculous as it seems, especially considering how fabulous and beautiful you are, there are some guys who just want to your friend. And tragically, it always seems to be the guy you want as more than a friend. And even more tragically, you always seem to find out AFTER you’ve professed your interest in a well-rehearsed speech or have leaned in for a goodnight-kiss.
Instead of throwing your hands up and swearing off men, keep in mind there’s nothing wrong with going out on a limb and taking a chance. I would actually suggest it because being in the friend-zone is not always a permanent state of being. But if you’re fed-up and tired of trying to decipher what signals he’s throwing at you, read on to learn five ways to tell if he’s just a friend.
1. You always seem to initiate conversations or plan times to hang out. As much fun as your hangouts with him are, you always find yourself planning them all by your lonesome. If you want to strike up a conversation with him, you have to pull out your phone and do all the texting. I’ve said this time and time again; when someone’s into you, they will make time and reach out to you (unless they’re painfully shy).
2. If a dude calls you his sister or “fam,” that’s the word “FRIENDSHIP” in flashing neon lights hanging from a giant billboard. No man will equate you to his family if he wants you as more than a friend. If there’s a kiss-of-relationship-death, that’s it.
3. You’re never alone with him. This one is a little trickier because there are definitely cases where a guy feels uncomfortable or nervous around you alone and might invite his friends to your hangouts to ease the awkwardness. But if every time he invites you to the movies and his whole crew takes up an entire row in the theater, this could be a sign he’s just not that into you. If he wants more than a friendship from you, the guy’s going to want some alone-time with you so he can make his move.
4. He talks about other girls with you. You know those awkward moments when you’re sitting with a guy you like, and he starts talking about how big some girl’s butt is or how much he likes this girl from his chemistry class? Well, those awkward moments often mean you’re sitting pretty in the friend-zone. Most guys try to be on their best behavior around a girl they like. They’re not going to talk about how other large some girl’s backside is with you.
5. He tries to set you up with a friend. RED ALERT! This is another flashing neon sign that directing you towards the friend-zone. If a guy is interested in you, he’s not going to set you up with one of his friends. If anything, he’s going to try to beat his friends off of you. If he starts telling you what a good guy his friend is and how you guys might hit it off, you have now past the flashing neon sign into the infamous friend-zone.