Fashion is kind of weird sometimes. What’s cool in one generation is considering awful the next (like, acid wash jeans were apparently a big thing before they became the butt of pretty much every style joke
ever in the last 20 or so years). Then, suddenly and without warning, those same trends come back with a vengeance. They go from passé to cutting edge in the time it takes the Man Repeller to click the ‘share’ button on her Instagram account.
The styles of different decades are always ‘in’ at one point or another, and right now it’s sort of all about the 90s. Now, I <3 the 90s. As a card-carrying 90s child raised on Surge and Dunkaroos, I am often hit with waves of nostalgia for Lip Smackers and Sweet Valley High books. But Birkenstocks? Not so much.
Let’s face it: The 90s were chock full of some seriously awful fashion. And some of its worst looks aren’t quite dead yet. In fact, they’re currently slow-dancing to “2 Become 1″ alongside some brand new (but still awful) fashion statements that are inexplicably everywhere.
Shirts tied around the waist: We need to talk about this. We all did this as kids and admittedly, LA’s heat caused me to sling my sweatshirt around my waist during a Runyon Canyon hike last year (I thought I was just being practical but maybe I should look into a career in trend forecasting?). But now the shirt-around-the-waist is more than a convenient fix – bloggers are lit-er-al-ly styling outfits around this trend. Wonder how long it’ll last.
Wedge sneakers: I mean, I totally bought into this trend. Still. It was a weird one. It’s one thing if you’re rocking’ those snedges with a sporty outfit but another thing entirely when they accompany a pretty little dress and a Celine bag (those bags should probably be on this list too because yuck).
Chunky white-soled shoes: There are so many beautiful shoes out there. Why do you insist on running around in those monstrous things? You look like your feet got stuck in a massive kiddie pool full of Wite-Out (how’s that for a nineties throwback, btw?) I don’t know what these shoes are actually called, nor do I care. I just refer to them as “hideous.”
Birkenstocks: Again, why? You could have worn ANY OTHER SHOE and chose something stoner dudes wore back in the day?
Crop tops: This is a complicated one. One the one hand, I can appreciate a good crop top if it only reveals a little sliver of skin and is worn under appropriate circumstances (crop topz at da club is NOT A GOOD LOOK. IMHO, anyway.) But those tight little ones that girls style with tight little bandage skirts? I mean, why would you want you want to wear anything that would limit your ability to eat 8 slices of pizza? I have one hashtag for you: #FoodBaby.