I have discovered the answer to ALL post grad problems. The post grad problems I’m talking about consist of: stress, finding jobs that make you happy, dating mature human beings, partying, being adventurous, finding yourself…you get the point. So, how are we supposed to conquer all of these grown up issues at such a young age? Be obsessed with yourself.

The other day, I walked into Home Depot with a mission. A mission to find a soft, neutral color that would match the awkward black trim of…my parents’ basement.That’s right. One month ago, I moved back home. And now, I’m sitting here with my dear mother at our kitchen counter in full on PJ-wear at noon, playing Words with Friends, browsing Pinterest and drinking coffee (because she’s my new roommate).

Then we had one of those moments over the phone where if we were in person we’d be jumping up and down hugging each other and falling on the floor in a tangled excited mess. This was happening. My first girlfriend was getting married to a person she truly loved and my lady mind couldn’t wrap my thoughts around it.

If I were to ever win a gold medal in the Olympics, it would be for over-thinking EVERYTHING. I guess I fit the typical girl stereotype. It’s totally like me to stand in the cosmetics aisle in Target for 80 hours trying to figure out which type of mascara I want. I’ll over-think a text I’m about to send to someone I’m dating. I’ll over-analyze a conversation I had with a friend and turn it into something it probably wasn’t in the first place.

I need a focus adjustment. Let’s just say I’ve been a little on the negative side lately. At first, I tried blaming it on the crappy weather (like I usually do) and then I realized I could be dealing with a personal problem. For example, whenever I’m about to do virtually anything, I immediately envision the worst possible outcome.

I want to relive the small moments. I want to relive the teeny side glances, the sweet kiss goodbye, the surprise compliment I received, the heartfelt compliment I gave. And then I’m left feeling at a loss — feeling like, though I did experience all those things, I also didn’t.

I flew across some interesting factoids about how to boost his ego after sex. How does Cosmo want you to do it? Say, “That thing you do with your tongue is unbelievable!” Whew, I’m getting exhausted just thinking about this. But maybe it’s just been too long since I’ve had a popsicle.

I’ve said it before 48,573 times and I will say it again. Life after college is a hectic whirlwind. And most of your time is spent trying to decipher if you’re happy with who you are, what you’re doing and where you’re doing it all. Is this what I’m supposed to be doing? Does this make me happy? He loves me, he loves me not. Blah, blah, blah, blah. But what happens after that hump?

Lately, I’ve been noticing something about these happy hours. I jump on them with all of my friends. New friends, old friends, friends from college, friends from high school, friends from work…and I realized something. My friend groups are slowly growing apart.

In college, I got into a nasty habit with my sweatpants. Our relationship took a very public turn. Yep, my sweatpants relationship was all about the PDA and I went everywhere with them on. Grocery store, library, Target, the mall…we were attached at the hip (pun intended).