If there’s one thing we all know (but often try to deny), it’s that college is basically it’s own little universe. It’s that beer-drinking, bar-hopping, Cliff Notes-reading, coffee-chugging “safe haven” between the comfort of your parents’ home and that place everybody calls “the real world.” And unfortunately, we all know that “real world” is much less exciting than MTV moguls would like us to believe.

As a senior, I’ve finally realized one very important thing: College is awesome. And there’s quite a lot of sh*t you can get away with here that just isn’t gonna fly once you graduate. For example:

1. Mid-day naps. Unless you decide to hightail your pretty bum down to Mexico or start your own company or something, mid-day siestas are generally not in the typical workin’ girl schedule. Oh, how I love the five hour breaks in between my classes.

2. Threesomes. Unless you want to end up like Charlotte in SATC, watching your dude getting’ frisky and feelin’ up some rando-girl while you stand awkwardly on the sidelines, I think threesomes are definitely better explored pre-graduation. I think almost everybody has at least one wild hookup story (that may or may not involve multiple partners) by the time they leave college. And that’s where those kind of explorations should probably stay. In college.

3. All nighters and Adderall binges. I’m pretty sure it’s not “adultlike” to stay up all night, downing cups of coffee and caffeine pills (or whatever your all-nighter drug of choice may be) to finish whatever crazy task your boss asks of you. Purple bruise-like bags under your eyes will never be sexy. Especially for an early morning meeting.

4. Pizza diets. Depending on where you live, life’s little luxuries, like one dollar slices on Monday nights, might not be at your disposal the way they are now. Nor should they be. You will be an adult and should be eating real food. Like steak or something.

5. The Uggs and North Face uniform. Or any variation, such as: Victoria’s Secret PINK collection from head-to-toe, matching college sweatshirts and sweatpants, etc. Real jobs require real clothes.

6. Tuesday bar hopping. I’ve already accepted that life is probably going to suck hardcore without one dollar cherry bombs on Tuesday night. I try to tell myself that I might be able to pull off being a member of the “Tuesday Crew” every once in awhile for the first few years after graduation. Or at least until I start to resemble my mother who gets a four day hangover after sipping half a glass of wine…spritzer.

7. Sleeping on random couches. I’m not gonna lie, I’ve done it. Quite a few times. …Without realizing it until the next morning. In the “real world,” I’m pretty sure people take stock of who is in their house when three a.m. rolls around. Maybe.

8. Meal plans. As much as college cafeteria food sucks, I think I’m really gonna miss late night mozzarella cheese stick feasts courtesy of Mom and Pops. In the “real world,” you can’t just go into some fancy sushi restaurant with your co-workers and hand the waiter your college ID and wave him off.

9. Making out with your best girl friends at bars and parties. In the “real world,” it’s no longer socially acceptable to grab your girlfriend’s face at the bar (..or you know, your company’s holiday party) and scream, “Let’s make out!” at the top of your lungs before proceeding to play tongue-tackle in front of a crowd. Unless you’re a total Debbie…as in, desperate. Or dumb.

10. Peeing in public places. In college, it’s normally (but not always!) kosher to pop a squat in the backyard at a party when the b-room runs of out T.P. In the “real world,” you’ll get arrested and labeled a sex offender before you can even empty your bladder.

11. Posting party photos on Facebook. This basically goes without saying. Once you graduate (hell, maybe we should all start this now?), don’t even THINK about posting that pic of you on the toilet throwing the peace sign. And, just to make sure you have all your bases covered, you’ll probably want to invest in an external hard drive so you can save all your old faves from undergrad and delete all incriminating photos off the internets forever.

Anything else you can think of that just can’t happen in the real world but is totally fine in college?

[This post is a favorite of CollegeCandy fan, Allyson...and it's one of our faves too!]

Who the F is Ke$ha??

The girl wears glitter. A lot of it.
She totally ripped off my girl Uffie.
She has a dollar sign IN HER NAME.
She has one song out…and it’s about getting wasted.

But girlfriend is everywhere. She’s all over the internet, the radio plays her song religiously and she’s even found a spot on my workout playlist. And my getting ready to go out playlist. And my walk to class playlist…

Now, I know the stars of pop music have been a little ridiculous lately (Exhibit A), but this new-found obsession with Ke$ha has me a little worried; bad romance outfits are one thing, but brushing your teeth with a bottle of Jack? Come on now, girl.

I mean – really, Kesha? – you “wake up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy”? What does it feel like to be an angry, controlling, egotistical rap mogul with a Twitter obsession?

And really, it’s great that you have set such lofty goals for yourself (“Tonight, I’ma fight until we see the sunlight”), but shouldn’t you be thinking about a few more serious things like, I don’t know… getting a job? Or giving back to the poor? Or getting proper dental care? I know that you  “Aint got a care in the world, but [you] got plenty of beer,” and that’s great; we all need a night off to just let loose. I feel ya, sister. But I really worry about the mental health of anyone who wants a dude that “look[s] like Mick Jagger.”

Is this the kind of person we want millions of little girls to look up to?

And why you gotta make your song so catchy, Ke$ha? Do you know how much I hate myself when I’m jumping around the bar and know every single (terrible) verse? I want to hate you – I really, really do – but hard as I try, I just can’t get enough. And that might be the worst thing of all.

Damn you, Ke$ha. Damn you.

Here’s a quick refresher: On January 13, 2010 (just two days ago), a 7.0 earthquake hit Haiti, devastating the country, crumbling their buildings and killing an estimated 50,000 people. Right now, Haitians have nothing: no food, no water, no shelter. Even their government has been destroyed, almost to the point of anarchy, according to some news reports.

You’ve seen the pictures, the videos.
The situation is bad. Really, really bad.

But there is one thing Haitians do have and that’s hope for outside help. Giving back is really important to us at CollegeCandy, and there has never been a better time to do so. Therefore, we are pleading with all of you to take a moment, educate yourselves on the dire situation in Port-au-Prince, and help.

To simplify things, The Daily Beast published a story about how best to help Haiti. The list is comprised of the organizations providing the most crucial aid, including The Red Cross, UNICEF and Doctors without Borders. Choose one and give!

As Obama has reminded us for the past two days, now is the time for the world to come together and help those in need. The donations don’t have to be large and, thanks to technology,  it’s never been easier to help. You can instantly send a $10 donation to the Red Cross by simply texting HAITI to 90999 (the money will be added to your monthly phone bill).

Just think about it: for the cost of 2 Venti Mocha Fraps at Starbucks, you can help rebuild a devastated country in need.

[Photo courtesy of CNN.com.]

First it was Paris and Nicole. Then it was Edward and Jacob. Now, it’s Conan and Leno.

Yup, it seems the late night kings of comedy are splitting the country as they battle it out over air times.

Here’s the deal: Leno’s new gig at 10 p.m. isn’t working out so well. Shocking? Not so much. NBC moved him to this slot over the summer hoping he’d be cheaper entertainment then those super pricey dramas. And while Jay may be cheaper, he’s definitely not entertaining. NBC execs, therefore, are working on another little switcharoo which will move Leno back to his 11:35 slot. A slot currently occupied by Conan O’Brien.

So where is Conan supposed to go?

He can’t exactly move back in to his old place, as its currently inhabited by the “comedy” of Jimmy Fallon (how he got that coveted spot I’ll never understand). And Conan’s show would never work at 10p.m., mostly because his target audience (i.e. college boys) are too busy playing Halo and ish to tune in so early.

So, again, where’s Conan supposed to go?!

What’s gonna happen to my favorite little (er, not so) late night TV host? Come on, I can’t be the only one who loves his twiggy arms and finds his quirky, mischievous demeanor totally hot. Oh wait… back to my point…

Some people are saying that Conan might be getting the boot, something Jay Leno has been joking about, but I’m not sure I find this so funny. In fact, I don’t find Jay funny at all. Or Jimmy. How is it, then, that the only late night host (besides Chelsea Handler – maybe they should move her to the 10pm slot?!) could be on his way out!? I won’t stand for this! It’s time to take a stand and choose your side, people. I’m taking my position on Team Conan. Which team will you be on?

Guys want Spanx, too!

The last decade brought about a wave of liberating changes for women. We stopped wearing pants. We (successfully?) raised children on our own (by choice, or by force). We kissed girls..and Russel Brand (and we liked it. A LOT.). We are so amazing, in fact, that men are starting to get a little jealous.

With every new year in the 2000′s (is that what we’re officially calling them?), new products for men come out that bring us one step closer to finally closing the gender gap that has existed since the beginning of time…and confirming the fact that Freud totally had the penis envy thing all wrong.

Makeup
Each morning we spend a glorious half hour (or more) skillfully covering our imperfections. First there’s foundation, then cover up and blush. Then we highlight our eyes with the perfect shades of shadow and make them pop with some mascara. Finally, we plump our lips, apply some gloss and smile at the beauty we’ve created in the mirror (which covered up the horror that was staring back at us upon waking up) before we happily flounce out the door looking shiny and new.

To be honest, I’ve always sorta felt bad for guys because they didn’t have the same luxury. If they have a zit, it’s there for the world to see.

But not anymore. Men have finally caught on. And not just emo rockstars. Companies devoted to makeup for dudes are popping up all over the place. In fact, seven out of ten men even admit they use women’s beauty products as part of their daily regime. So that’s where all my cocoa butter went!

Mantyhose
Pantyhose are the epitome of womanhood. They control the muffin top, tuck in the tummy and make it possible to sport our summer dresses in winter. They also happen to be horribly uncomfortable and might be the most annoying thing about being a woman. And now men get to join in on the fun! I’m not really sure why dudes want some of these to call their own – does this mean man-skirts are on the horizon? – but they’re here.

Extra Padding
Women have totes got the “if you don’t got it, fake it” thing down to a T. We know that if our boobs are too small, or we don’t got enough junk in our trunk, there’s a simple solution: padding. We’ve been sporting the padded bras for years and some of us have even gone so far as padded undies. And now the boys are finally catching on. I guess they were feeling a little left out (in addition to a little peeved when they got home and saw the heat – or lack thereof – we ladies were really packin’) so they joined in on the padded fun. Enhance away, boys!

Spanx

If women can suck, tuck and trim those waistlines with the aid of a (very difficult to slip on) undergarment, it’s only fair men can too, right? Welcome the BodyShaper Max t-shirt for the boys. This little guy will flatten out that beer belly and take care of the moobs giving the illusion that the guy looks like this under that bedazzled graphic tee.

Now all we need are high heels for the shorties and we’ll be equal at last.

That label is lying to her. And so are her friends who told her that shirt was cute.

Be warned, ladies: Nutrition labels lie.

A new study of meals from ten different popular food chains found that the actual calorie counts of those meals averaged 18 percent higher than what was advertised. I’m not very good at math, but I think that adds up to a LOT of extra cals.

I know what you’re thinking: first, it’s my grande caramel frappucinno, and now I can’t even indulge in a little frozen Chicken Carbonara? The truth hurts, sista.

It doesn’t surprise me that Wendy’s and chains like Ruby Tuesday would cheat a little to impress the occasional health nut who actually checks their calorie counts and market themselves as “healthy.” But with them, what does it really matter? If you’re wolfing down a Classic Triple with cheese or Shrimp Alfredo pasta with white cheddar mashed potatoes on the side, calories are probably not your first concern. What does surprise me is the fact that frozen meal companies, like Lean Cuisine and Weight Watchers, are doing this and getting away with it. Um, isn’t low cals the only reason anyone buys a Smart Ones Salisbury Steak? Lord knows it’s not because it tastes good… or like Salisbury Steak.

I feel cheated. I feel angry. I feel…fat. Who knows how many extra calories I’ve been shoving down my throat? Calories I could have enjoyed a whole lot more if I were eating a delicious cheeseburger instead of some crappy frozen chicken dinner that I thought was a healthier option.

Hopefully a study like this will force restaurants and food companies to be more honest in their labeling. Until then, chew cautiously, ladies. And maybe hit the gym a little harder just to be safe.

If you’re like the majority of women, you’ve had it drilled into your head that the “little black dress” is the answer to all your wardrobe issues. It’s listed in every “must-have” wardrobe list because it “looks soooo great on everyone!” But experts now say that in actuality, only 1 in 5 women look good in black.

Cue my heart shattering.

According to some, black has the ability to “severely age” a woman’s face. It can “highlight dark lines under the chin, shadows around the eyes and wrinkles on the face.” Plus, wrinkles and other sunken areas can “appear darker and more pronounced.” (Someone should clue Kelly Cutrone in on this one…) This means the older you are, the more haggard black can make you look. And no matter how slimming that LBD is, it won’t matter when your face looks like this.

Well isn’t that just wonderful. My entire wardrobe consists of black, grey and white. I have been told that these colors were uber flattering by innumerable fashion mags, and like a lost puppy dog (which is essentially what I am when it comes to fashion), I blindly followed their advice. And now look what I’ve got: a closet full of clothes that make me look old and wrinkly.

How do you know if you’re the black exception or the rule? “Hold the color up against your face, stand in front of the mirror and look for dark lines under the chin, shadows around the eyes or lines on the face that are highlighted. If there are no dark areas or shadows, you can probably wear black close to your face and look great.”

And if holding up that black v-neck makes you look less Jackie-O and more Barbara Bush, it’s time to figure out what you should be wearing (and taking all that black to the local resale shop). There are three factors that go into picking out the perfect colors for you – skin tone, hair color and eye color. It all gets a little complicated, but there are some great guides out there to help you find your perfect palette:

How To Match Colors from TheSoko.com. Simple.

Fashion Help for Recovering Goths from GalaDarling.com.
If you’ve got a little time and want a more comprehensive (albeit, slightly confusing) tutorial, this one is for you.
Which Season Are You from AskAndyAboutClothes.com.

Choose Colors to Flatter Your Skin Tone from eHow.com.
Another simple how-to to help with revamping your wardrobe with colors that won’t make you look like a witch.

Now that you know what works best for you, take your other 3 friends who can’t wear black and hit the mall. This is nothing a little retail therapy can’t fix.

"Is your picker off?"

The time has come, ladies!

The holidays are over, winter break is in full swing (or completely over, for some of us) and we no longer have to rely on “MADE” re-runs to satiate our hunger for reality TV. Lots of our favorite (read: guiltiest pleasure) shows are coming back this month. So whether you’re still chillaxin on mama’s couch nomming on those delish little leftover Ferrero Rocher chocolates (just me?) or back on campus and in dire need of an escape from “Human Communication 101,” here’s CC’s guide to winter 2010 TV premieres:

The Millionaire Matchmaker: Tues, Jan. 19 @ 10pm EST on Bravo.
Patti’s heart-shaped engagement ring is pretty fug, but the hot-mess-millionaires are totes worth watching.

Project Runway: Thursday, Jan. 14 @ 10 EST on Lifetime. Followed by The Models of the Runway.
It will never be as good as its Bravo days, but it still has Tim and Heidi. And the token hilarious gay guy.

Celebrity Rehab w/ Dr. Drew: Thurs., Jan. 7 on VH1.
OH.EM.GEE!

Nip/Tuck: Weds., Jan. 6 @ 10 on FX.
The.Final.Season. About time, right?

Iron Chef America: Sunday, Jan. 10 on Food Network.
Nom nom nom.

What Not to Wear: Friday, Jan. 8 @ 9 EST on TLC.
Clinton Kelly is straight, right? I mean, I have a chance with him?

The Buried Life: Monday, Jan. 18 @ 10 EST on MTV.
MTV moves away from the trashy and attempts to inspire us all to do good. Plus the four main guys are totally cute. I know I’ll be watching.

The Vampire Diaries: Thurs., Jan. 21 @ 8 EST on CW.
Because vampires are hot.

American Idol: Tues., Jan. 11 @ 8 EST on Fox.
Goodbye Paula (and incoherent ramblings). Hellooooooo, Ellen!

Parks and Recreation: Thurs., Jan. 14 @ 8:30 EST on NBC.
Nestled nicely between Community and The Office, this show is hard to miss. So don’t miss it.

Lost : Tues., Feb. 2 @ 9 EST on ABC.
Finally, I can find out what the eff is happening.

The Office: Thurs., Feb. 4 @ 9 EST on NBC.
Jim and Pam baby. Jim and Pam baby. Jim and Pam BABY!!

And just in case you were too busy catching up on world news or, more realistically, watching reruns of Jersey Shore for the 6th time, here are a few shows that kicked it off this week. Don’t worry – you can catch the reruns online.

The Biggest Loser: Tuesdays @ 8 EST on NBC.
The first episode is always pretty boring anyway…

The Bachelor: Mondays @ 8 EST on ABC.
Do you really need to see the first episode to get dragged in to the dramz? Hell no.

The Secret Life of the American Teenager: Mondays @ 8 EST on ABC Family.
This show is good. Really good. Start watching!

Giuliana & Bill: Sundays @ 9 EST on Style
Yeah, we don’t want to care about these two either, but they’re so damn cute we just can’t stop.

"I never want to be apart from you. Ever ever.

Brace yourself, ladies: We are now entering Break up Season. According to a study released in 2007 by Yahoo!, this little span of time between the December holidays and Valentine’s Day happens to be the period when most couples head to Splitsville. (Geez – Is it really that bad to have to buy someone some roses?!)

I don’t know about you, but it took me a really long to find a guy I can stand to spend more than 10 minutes with, so I’m willing to do just about anything to make sure we make it through February and beyond. Well, not anything; I’m not giving up SATC reruns or scooping peanut butter out of the jar for anybody. Not even the boyf.

In order to help you keep your relationship in working order as well, I’m here to clue you in on 8 surefire ways to KILL that fabulous relationship you’ve got goin’ on. Engage in any of these flame-squelching behaviors and you’ll be ladeling out that Edy’s Slow Churned in front of the TV all by your lonesome come V-Day.

Don’t say we didn’t warn you.

1. Talk about wanting babies. College guys are only thinking about four B’s: booze, bongs, boobs and birth control.

2. Talk to your mom about him…and tell him about it. This is how it works in his head: Talking to your mother about him = you think you’re getting married…and he runs away. Screaming. Trust me on this one.

3. Living together too soon. I’ve seen a lot of otherwise happy couples turn into raging lunatics once they decide to shack up; even spending too much time at each other’s houses can turn into a nightmare. Just think about it: nothing about shopping for toilet paper together screams romance.

4. Texting ALL THE TIME. Constant communication is really not necessary to maintain a relationship. In fact, it can be the thing that kills one. I understand wanting to be a part of your boyfriend’s life, but is his day-to-day (or the few hours you don’t see him) really that exciting? I’ve come to realize there is a formula for college guy’s lives and it goes a little something like this: Wake up. Poop. Shower. Go to class. Eat. Poop again. Work. Get drunk. Sleep. Repeat. If you don’t talk to him for a few hours, you’re not really missing much. (And, come on, do you really want him texting you from the bathroom?)

5. Obsessing over your ex. Nobody likes to hear about anybody else’s ex. Your friends don’t even wanna hear you obsess about him – do you think your boyfriend will?

6. Inviting him home to meet your family. DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT invite anyone home with you until you are absolutely 100% sure that you are in an actual relationship. Luda summed it up best: “Don’t wanna meet your mama, just want to make you…” Inviting the frat boy you drunkenly (and sloppily) made out with last weekend to meet your pops will stop whatever chance there ever was at blossoming romance. (There is a chance, right??)

7. Trying to be “One of the Guys.” It’s awesome if you two can share some interests – watch football together, or something – but it’s another thing to try to weasel your way into every Poker Night, Taco Tuesday or Wacky Wednesday get-together. Everybody needs time with their own kind every once in awhile. Just like you wouldn’t care to have him come along to get a pedi with your friends (and would be slightly worried if he agreed), he doesn’t need you there to enjoy “Toozday Boozday” with the guys.

8. Jealousy and Insecurity. On a more serious note, jealousy and insecurity is the NUMBER ONE relationship killer. If you’re not totally convinced that you’re a bad *ss chick with sassiness to spare, how can your guy believe it?

I’m sure there are plenty more ways to kill relationships (and I’ve probably tried them all!) What are some relationship killers you’ve witnessed?

Wait, what?

According to a poll of 2,200 women conducted by (who else?) Special K cereal, more than a quarter of women, 29.1 percent to be exact, said that “fitting into an old pair of jeans” would feel BETTER. THAN. SEX.

Let’s be honest here. I’m in college – I drink copious amounts of alcohol. I eat bad food..and a lot more of it than I should. I would love to be able to shed a few pounds and pull my high school pants over my muffin top. But, better than sex? I don’t know about that one. Maybe if I was somehow fitting into my leggings from middle school. Or that awesome 98 Degrees baby tee I picked up at a concert.

Other responses included 28.9% who said squeezing into those skinny jeans would “beat a promotion,” (being thin > being rich??) and one in ten who said it would “beat a marriage proposal.”

WTF?

I can see how there’s a connection between small jeans and sex (but more in that trying to squeeze into a tight pair of jeans is about as painful as your first time between the sheets….), but these results are really just shocking.

Honestly, who are these bitches having all this bad sex?