Cosmo Says the Darndest Things: August Edition
The minute, and I mean the minute, I spotted Britney Spear’s discolored blond extensions on the cover of Cosmopolitan this month, I grasped the magazine tightly in my fingertips, sighed extravagantly and hugged my copy. This means I get to read one of those famous Cosmo Quizzes filled out by B. Spears!
The Bachelorette: Another One Bites the Dust
Come. On. Come on! Did I miss the memo? Was last night’s Bachelorette episode actually Frank’s screen test for a new Nicholas Sparks film? One more silent tear and I would have been begging for mercy. That entire subplot was – am I allowed to say it? – so freakin’ fake. I’m insulted Chris Harrison would try and pass that off as reality. Shame on you!

The Morning After: Pop a Squat
While you’re busy busting out A+’s and making new friends in college, it’s always really nice to go home for a weekend. And that is especially true during your freshman year when home friends routinely have elaborate parties where people drunkenly reunite.
And In Other Weird News
An English house cat has taken to breaking into neighbor’s homes and stealing children’s underwear. Michelle Duggar better keep that cat out of her hamper if she wants to hang onto her Mother of the Year Award. Yeah, apparently some people think having nineteen kids is something to which we should all aspire.
Why All The Miley Cyrus Hatred, Peeps?
The days are long gone when Miley Cyrus swung her abnormally thick blond tresses all over her bedazzled bright jackets in Disney’s, Hannah Montana. I can almost hear her nasally, trumpeting laugh in the background as my (always loyal to every showing of the sitcom) lil’ sis watched it mid-afternoon, hooting and hollering in between bites of Gushers.
Gossip Cheat Sheet: Uncle Jesse Is Victorious!
What. A. Week. Am I right? There’s been so much going on over in HWood that it seems like it’s been months since Lindsay gave the ol’ “F You” to the judge. But that was just last week! We weren’t too sure what was going to happen after that bizness, but we had a very good feeling that Michael Lohan would do anything to keep himself his daughter in the headlines.
Steve Jobs – Just Another Bad Boy We Can’t Help But Love
Steve Jobs and Apple Inc. held their press conference earlier today regarding all the controversies swirling about the defects found in the iPhone 4. If ya’ll remember correctly, I was the geeky nerd who stood in line on June 24th at the Apple store and waited for two hours (with the rest of the Apple fanatics) to get my hands on the new iPhone.

Around the Web

The 200+ Reasons Women Have Sex…and The 3 Reasons Men Do
To make a long story long, sex to a woman means a plethora of complex things. Sex is a loaded gun containing bullets of feelings, emotions, and meaning (even I’m getting a little poetic talking about it). Sex for the dudes on the other hand? It’s really just a three letter word.
The CC Weekly Weigh In: TTFN, Dumb Celebs
Nothing causes me more anxiety and ill feelings than watching Kelly Bensimon talk on the Real Housewives of New York. Seriously, it makes my stomach churn more than watching those addicts stick needles in their arms on Intervention (barf). The woman is infuriating and I think my neighbor (who hears me screaming through the wall) would agree that I’d be better off without her.
The Six Types of Friends You’ll NEVER See over Summer Break
Ah, summer. The temperatures rise, the air thickens, our tans darken (unless you work in an office like me), and we go back to the old friends from home that we haven’t spent much time with in the past year. But among the mass of people you used to see all the time in high school, there are six different types of people that you will never see over your long summer vacation at home.
The Know: Maroon 5 is Back, Baby
ince the days of “Harder to Breathe,” I’ve been a fan of Maroon Five. A huge fan. So huge a fan, in fact, that in middle school I would belt out the lyrics to “This Love” in my Catholic school hallway. I like to think I was the trendsetter in middle school, who started singing the risqué lyrics (I really had no idea what they meant) and drooling over the ever-so-fine Adam Levine first.
Mel Gibson Gives Hollywood A-Holes a Run for Their Money
Somebody didn’t get to eat their Cracker Jacks for breakfast this year and has a raging and swollen case of the ‘crabby pants.’ That somebody is Mel Gibson. But crabby pants might be an understatement. The man is absolutely reserving the Presidential Suite at the Loopy Inn.

The Five Questions We Ask Everyone: Shallon Lester
Although Downtown Girls chronicles a group of friends, Shallon Lester steals the show with her outspoken and funny personality. With a larger-than-life persona that makes Shallon seem like everyone’s best friend, her energy is contagious. Who wouldn’t want to be her friend?