My Sex Diary made me come to terms with a heretofore unrealized love for older men. There is that horrible stereotype about men aging better than women, and although I won’t speak for older women, I can absolutely attest to the fact that many guys seem to go the way of the fine wine and age deliciously. I’m in the market for an (imaginary) sugar daddy. Let’s go shopping.

Mike Rowe-46. Mike was exactly my age when I was born, …

Good news, Hills fans!

Rumors are circling that MTV will be adding yet another spin-off to the ever popular series. I know you, like me, are all waiting in eager anticipation for the premier of Bromance, but get ready to add somethin’ else to the DVR.

For those of you who l-o-v-e the drama, but are so o-v-e-r Lauren Conrad, get ready: Whitney Port will be getting her very own show.

Us Weekly reports that Whit’s new gig will …

You know all those times when you’re like “Damn, I would love to get some burgers for the whole family, but I don’t want to order them individually,” so, you order a pizza instead? Yeah, me neither. But apparently, Burger King thinks we’re all having a whole lot of these moments as they’re going to start offering a six-pack of burgers in an attempt to compete with the pizza market.

How does a six-pack of burgers differ from six individual …

You may have already heard that Clay Aiken has impregnated someone.

No, not that way. Come on.

Aiken has artificially inseminated his “best friend” and producer, Jaymes Foster, who is in her late 40’s. Clay has even decided to be a father in earnest (no, not that way) and help raise the little tyke. The baby is due in August, which means that they’ve managed to keep this under wraps for a while now.

I would like to offer my …

So in the land of the rising sun, a woman was trapped in the closet. Oddly like R. Kelly. Since she was there for like a year, I imagine there were some moments not unlike those found in Mr. Kelly’s masterwork. What am I talking about?

Well for those of you who ignore the news clickers no doubt found to the side of your email logins, in Japan (aka: Weird Capital of the World) a homeless woman was caught living …

(SARA, 23, walks down the street in Queens, NY with a giant bag of laundry. As she passes the elementary school by her apartment, she comes across a group of 14-year-old[?] boys. One KID separates out to meet the next group of boys half a block up.)

KID

(to his friend)

Yo, Hassan! Mothaf*cka gonna rob your ass, son!

(Kid laughs and presses the fire alarm, which buzzes one loud buzz. He turns around to look at Sara.)

KID

Testing …

30-year-old, Dallas resident Brian Davidson made his debut on last night’s episode of So You Think You Can Dance. Though he was on camera for less than three minutes, he managed to offend, sully and for all intense and purposes ruin the following things for the viewing public:

- Dancing

- The state of Texas

- America in general

- Long-underwear inspired shirts

- Muhammad Ali

- People who sound freakishly similar to Thomas Haden Church

- and periods…because they …

(SARA, 23, sits with her DAD, 57, in a Thai restuarant near Sara’s apartment, waiting for her MOM, also 57, to come back from the bathroom so they can get this show on the road.)

SARA

(impatient)

What’d she, fall in?

DAD

You look…different.

SARA

Oh yeah, I’m growing out my bangs.

DAD

(brightening)

Oh yeah?

SARA

…Yeah…

DAD

You know I’ve never been a fan of when you have bangs. Even when you were a little kid.

SARA

Yeah, …

[Warning to the reader: Story line and contents of this episode are discussed below].

Bret and Jemaine have moved to NYC from New Zealand. This first episode – the pilot – is my favorite, as FOC packs in a number of songs, allowing the viewer to get a real sense of what their act is all about. (The other episodes, I’ve found, don’t include as many songs as this first one).

With a full introduction to Bret and Jemaine, the …

In my most recent article, I discussed the fact that my boyfriend does not read what I post here. As I am a delicate, ladylike and discreet young woman, I did not publish his name – or, for that matter, any details that could have identified him to the reading public.

I have good news for you. He read my article. We talked it over. And we’re ready to go public.

Here he is.

It’s been a whirlwind romance. When …