Hickeys. WTF good does a hickey ever do? WTF bad does a hickey ever do? Now that's a question I can answer. Unfortunately my answer involves parents, family friends and some big league embarrassment.
Let’s face it: we all make stupid decisions. Like choosing a fifth over a review session, or bringing that guy home…who stole our iPod in the morning. That’s part of college life... and a big part of what makes it so memorable. But there are some choices that have longer lasting repercussions; things we do now that will haunt us later.
Classes are out, exams are over, and I am thrilled to announce that outside my window it is a blissful 78 degrees. Dearest readers- the summer season is within reach. With the heat comes a breezy wardrobe, new flings, and a fresh excuse to document all the places you get drunk with those arm-out pictures that crop off half your face.
Shizz went down this week: Biebs has a tat, Miley is still a bird, and George Lopez cheated on his wife (the same wife who GAVE HIM HER KIDNEY) with some hookers. You know, just another week. Anyway, while it pains me that I know so much about the lives of these people, I'm happy to report the deets for all of you. I really am a martyr.
I don't even know what to say about this. I mean, it's just too easy.
College time is like dog years; the things you accomplish/see/learn/sleep through in one year would take seven in the real world. And by the time you graduate, you'll have a whole lot to look back on. Between your academic accomplishments, your social accomplishments and just those little things you've learned about life (like doing your own laundry - HUGE milestone!), there's a lot to be proud of.
• Jesse James explains why he's such an ass he cheated. • What ever happened to JTT? • Courtney Love drags Kate Moss into the crazy. • Katherine Heigl tries to seem more lovable. • They'll let anyone become a professor, eh? • Oh no, Miss USA, don't do it!
• WTF is up with man-heels? • Kendra's sex tape might not be so bad for her.... • Did porn almost kill Bret Michaels? • Well, that's one way to deal with a cheater. • And this is why these people are single. • HOLY HELL. What are hipsters going to do now?!
It's no secret that Lindsay Lohan is in deep, smelly, steaming shadoobie. Between the drunken stumbles, the Twitter fights with her GF and the vagina flashes, we've been watching this girl's fall from grace for years now. We don't expect anything but a hot mess anymore.
Plucking, waxing, and threading your eyebrows is far from an enjoyable process. Some might even go as far as to say it hurts like a bitch is painful. But it's worth it to many to get that perfectly arched, perfectly thinned out brow. But why? These gorgeous women prove that skipping out on the monthly (or in my case, weekly) upkeep and going for a more natural look is the way to go.
Stories of unfaithful celebrity husbands and the graphic details of their infidelities seem to be spreading faster than oil in the Gulf. But while we hear plenty about the unfaithful -- or rumored unfaithful -- why is it we never hear much about famous philandering females?
• Spotted: Johnny Depp lookin' fiiine at Cannes. • Now that's a commencement speech. • Lindsay Lohan "lost" her passport, stuck in France. • Uh oh, Heroes is in trouble! • Who thought this was a good idea? • TMI, Will Smith and Jada!
I love when completely undeserving, socially unacceptable, borderline retarded people like Snooki are somehow able to rake in the big bucks for absolutely no reason at all. Good for you! (Actually, if you couldn’t tell by my tone, I absolutely hate it).
• I want what Jennifer Aniston is drinking. • Would you wear floral jeans? • Getting rid of those much-loved closet misfits. • 8 horrible drugstore products to AVOID. • Wanna see Kendra's sex tape cover? • These two look like a lot more than co-stars.
So it seems the people behind The Hills really want to go out with a bang…. and reignite Ryan Cabrera’s failed music career. It worked for Gaga (remember when LC and Whitney had to style her at some event a few seasons back?), so maybe Mr. Cabrera will be donning leotards and selling out stadiums around the world in a few years.
• Want a little taste of SATC 2? • Joey Fatone takes a stab at a solo career. • OMG, all our Spencer Pratt dreams are coming true! • Ashley Greene and Kellan Lutz may be out of Twilight. • Russell Brand's got an interesting addiction. • The downsides of dating your friends.
Every month when I pick up my Cosmo, my roommate always picks it up off the coffee table and starts to read it. It’s entertaining, I know. But really, the only reason I read it is for research for this column. Don’t people (a.k.a my roommate) realize this magazine is filled with nonsense?! It doesn’t even have juicy celeb gossip to read to make me feel like I’m part of the inner celebrity circle.
Was there anything more exhilarating, more energizing, more exciting than grilling a friend over AIM in 7th grade about what base she got to with her boyfriend? Of course at that point, first base was getting matched up with a guy during an intensive game of M.A.S.H, second base was making out in the back row of a movie theater while your friends sitting next to you giggled, and third base was letting him feel your training bra over your shirt.
If Chelsea Handler's ex, Comcast head honcho Ted Harbert, is harboring any doubts that their breakup won't stick, he should go see her one-woman show, 'Chelsea, Chelsea, Bang, Bang.' Chelsea certainly isn't drowning her sorrows in her Belvedere. The raunchy comedienne is having the time of her life.
Holy hell, the hits just kept on coming. First we discover Dan and Serena did a little lip-locking, then Jenny sells out her own bro in some evil plot to get Nate to love her perhaps we should send her a copy of "He's Just Not That Into You"?), then Blair finds Jenny in Brooklyn and does probably the meanest thing she’s ever done.
• Jennifer Hudson looks hot, has it all. • Makeup can make you sick. • Check out Mac's sizzling new summer collection! • Ke$ha's getting even weirder. If that's possible. • Wait, Justin Bieber is more than friends with Miley?! • Two CW stars get their happily ever after.
No, they’re not tubes of chapstick or popsicles. Those, ladies, are grown men dressed as tampons. The French division of Tampax decided this was the best marketing strategy to take when pitching you their product. Huh?
While guys love ranking foreign and domestic beer, I love ranking foreign and domestic men. Which is why the Cannes Film Festival is my favorite time of year. Gorgeous men from near and far come together (in tuxedos!) to look into my soul the camera and look super fine. And even though Carey Mulligan tried to subvert my stalking by standing in front of every. camera. in the country of France, I was able to round up a few choice shots of Cannes’ finest.
• Wait, the Miss USA pageant happened? • Congrats, Gwen Stefani!! • The SATC ladies are closer than ever. • In a perfect world..... • Another Roman Polanski victim? • The perfect beach solutions for every body.
By now, everyone is looking forward to the summer. Thoughts of a pool, a raft and a cold beer are about the only things getting us through the hell that is finals week. But while I love me some summer sundresses and the prospect of a steamy summer fling, summer isn't all rainbows and butterflies for me. Yes, this whiny girl with a Jew-fro has a bit of a bone to pick with summer.
There's so much I love about drinking: it helps me forget about stress and schoolwork, it makes everything that happens so much funnier, and it's fun to do outside when it's nice out. (...and inside when it's crappy out. And in the morning. And in the night. And on Mondays.) And those crappy Black Eyed Peas songs you usually can't stand? Total fist pumpers! Not to mention the hilarious piecing together that happens the morning after.
It all started with lime green spandex shorts. I thought they were the perfect thing to wear to the Glow theme party. And the St. Patrick's theme party. But those lime green spandex shorts really only spelled trouble for me.
• Law and Order gets the axe. My Saturdays are ruined. • Serena Williams has a BF. And he's in loooove. • The government says: more toilets for the ladies! • Ke$ha's got a new vid. Not surprisingly, it's weird. • 10 food secrets you didn't know. • Is Elizabeth Banks doin' the nasty with Chris Pine ?
Hey, guess what? Another male celebrity can't keep it in his pants! Bet you didn't see that one coming. We've had, what, a week without a cheating scandal in the past 2 months? While I know celebrity romances rarely last, my naivety sometimes gets the best of me when it comes to cheating.
Allow me to introduce you to Panty O's, the panties that strengthen your pelvic floor muscles because "tighter is better." (Yes, that is a direct quote from their low-budge website.)
Every morning, I gather with the fabulous CollegeCandy interns to peruse the interwebs and see what's happenin'. (This is, of course, after I make them walk 50 blocks and get me an extra hot, no whip, with soy, half-caf latte and make them pour some Bailey's into it.... just because.)
For college seniors, the fear is setting in right about..... now. Finals are coming to an end, graduation is looming (or already happened), and with nothing else to do, you've got a lot of time on your hands to think. And wonder. And freak the f**k out.
• Billy Ray supports Miley's lap dance. (And we do too!) • Who does Victoria's Secret think is the perfect woman? • Cougar Town gets a new name. • Can someone please explain Gaga's shoes to me? • One Tree Hill might not be going anywhere. • Did he really just say that?
• Rachel Uchitel's texts to David Boreanaz have leaked. • The worst wedding DJ EVER. • Taylor Momsen is such a rebel. • 7 reasons to learn how to cook. • Probably not the healthiest snacks. • Jennifer Aniston and Kate Hudson get in a boy brawl.
Every day we're bombarded with a million different messages about what we are supposed to look like. And tell you what, our not-so-scientific-yet-totally-accurate visual research proves that 99% of girls out there don't fit the mold.