The split between Conan O’ Brian and NBC is official, and like any break-up,  someone is sitting home, drinking tequila and crying themselves to sleep.

But surprisingly, that someone is not Conan O’Brien.
In fact, it looks like Mr. O’Brien might actually be doing better than ever.

While Conan may be totally getting the bad end of the deal with NBC, a bright hue of spotlight has been pointed directly in his path.  The publicity of The Tonight Show has been higher than ever, crushing his opponents, Letterman and Leno, in ratings.

But beyond simply tuning in to see what Conan has to say about the sitch (which, I admit, is the reason I started watching him), this entire debacle has given Mr. O’Brien tons of high-larious new material for the show. Seriously, the Tonight Show has never been better. Tell me you didn’t LOL when Conan went against the rules of bad-mouthing NBC by doing it in Spanish. “NBC is run by brainless sons of goats who eat money and crap trouble.” It’s Conan at his best.

And let’s be honest – America loves a good underdog story and Conan is most definitely the (insulting) underdog in this situation. He got Kanye’d and, much like Taylor Swift, now he’s got millions of people fighting for him across the country (there’s even an entire Facebook movement in support of him!) Sure, he had a strong fanbase before, but this has taken him to a level of fame he’s never seen until now.

It’s unfortunate that Conan is being pushed out of NBC, but with $45 million in his pocket and a whole slew of new super fans, getting the shaft might be the best thing that ever happened to this guy’s career. NBC, on the other hand, well their just effed.

You go, CoCo!

Tonight is the season finale of the Jersey Shore.

Let’s all take a moment of silence.

In preparation for this tragic ending I am beginning to practice the coping skills I learned from my therapist to use when dealing with a break-up.  Because this is a break-up. A really painful one.

You see my relationship with The Jersey Shore began like any other meaningful relationship.  I saw a preview and was interested.  I didn’t know exactly what it would offer me, but it seemed attractive enough for me to find out.  I committed to the first episode and was anxious to see how things would go, just like any first date.  By the end…I was hooked.

I am the first to admit my own psychosis…I became a stage five clinger.  I stalked The Jersey Shore by watching YouTube clips, looking for trailers, anything I could.  Our relationship blossomed as I became more and more intrigued with each character and I felt as if I actually lived in the house and could call the Duck Phone my own.  I found myself referring to the characters and constantly contributing my input to their lives.  “Did you SEE that girl The Situation brought home? Even he could do better than that!”

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If there is anything in this world I can rely on to be there for me (besides Dove Dark Chocolate) it is my big, bottomless, purse.  Chapstick? Got it. $2.41 in all dimes and pennies? Got it. Four flattened Milk Duds? Got it.  The Vegas Map and some Floss Picks? You’ve guessed it, I’ve got it.

I’m not the only one who loves me an oversized bag. According to Alan in The Hangover, even “Indiana Jones has one.” And why not? Besides holding Skittles and $80,000, huge bags are the perfect way to tote your most needed (and maybe not-so-needed) belongings. But they don’t come without their issues, namely back pain and  the embarrassment that comes with accidentally swinging that thing too close to a wall of breakables.

Big purses have made their statement in the fashion world and their way onto women’s (sore) shoulders worldwide. But as much as we all love ‘em, and boy do I love mine, there seems to be some extra “baggage” that comes with the bottomless wonder.

Pro: The Olsen Twins are right about one thing: big bags slung at your side do make you look slimmer.
Con: Try navigating a packed bar with this thing. You may look thinner, but you won’t feel it as you’re trying to make your way through the throngs of drunks with an extra 6lbs on you. Not to mention a wet shirt when you inevitably knock everyone’s drinks out of their hands.

Pro: You can fit virtually anything in your big purse. There are pockets and mystery caverns to put your most valuable items. My purse is like a transformer; one minute I keep all my books in it and the next minute I have secret mini shots of Smirnoff in a mystery back pocket.
Con: You can’t find anything in that behemoth! Good luck finding your ringing phone; every time you reach for it you pull out hand lotion, a half-eaten sandwich or – score! – that roll of quarters you’ve been searching for. And you know this is a problem, which is why you put that phone in the pocket. But of course you don’t remember that as  you scour the bottom of the bag for the faint sounds of “Tik Tok” playing somewhere in there. Read More »

So with the recent influx of Spiedi-bites and Guidette catfights on MTV, there is finally hope for our generation to be remembered for some old fashioned do-gooding.

MTV’s latest reality show, The Buried Life, chronicles the journey of four boys from Canada, (Ben, Duncan (<3), Jonnie and Dave) who realized that they didn’t want to die with unfulfilled lives, so they wrote out a list of things they wanted to do before they died, bought a bus (Penelope) and set out to accomplish their own “bucket lists.”  But in addition to every dream they crossed off on their lists,  they decided that they would do one thing for someone else, making it doubly fulfilling.

In the first episode (which I just watched thanks to 200 pages of reading on Monday night), the boys set out to accomplish their sixth list item: party at the Playboy mansion (they are guys after all).  Two of the guys dress up like Oompa Loompas and attempt to get in through a cake and Ben dressed up as soccer star Christiano Ronaldo to try and get in.  The mission was successful as far as the boys were concerned, but not just because they got to party with some scantily clad lady friends.  They also (through some serious street performing skills) got a new computer for an LA grade school in need. Read More »

There are some things you learn in life (and in textbooks) that you never forget.

We went to the moon in 1969.
Plants live by converting sunlight into energy through the process of photosynthesis.
Cows have four stomachs.

All of those things are important to know if you want to pass that middle school test, but when it comes to the real stuff – the life lessons – textbooks don’t hold a candle to TV. Yes, I’m serious.

TV – even the crappiest of the crappy reality shows – has taught me some invaluable lessons about life and the world. Things you can’t get from a 2 hour Intro to Biology lecture or a 4-credit History of English course. Below are a few of the greatest lessons I’ve learned from my nights spent on the couch, chips and salsa in hand. Read More »

One would think getting Monday off would make for a more pleasant week, but one would be wrong. Yeah, we’re all one day closer to the weekend, but we also spent one more day last weekend partying it up and eating cheese fries at 3am. And it has taken a serious toll on our bodies. We’re seriously dreaming of the moment we can crawl into bed, watch Modern Family and pass out.

But before we do, let’s play a game of Would You Rather. If nothing else, pondering life’s most random situations will turn our brains on for those back-to-back lectures we have this afternoon. Think long and hard – and then re-think it just to be sure – and choose your answer. Then, if you can handle the thought, share your reasoning in the comment section below. Read More »

“All I want to do now is f**k the girls I’ve already f**ked, because I can’t fathom explaining myself to somebody who can’t believe I’d be interested in them. I’m too freaked out to meet anybody else”

-John Mayer (Rolling Stone)

Ok John Mayer, what the hell?

Let’s just forget about the fact that you have, time and again, been in insanely dysfunctional relationships with some of the most beautiful women ever: Jessica, Minka, and, lest the world forget, Jen.  But that’s not the point here.  The point here is this: you are now in a dysfunctional relationship with your fans. The people who should be most important to you. The people who are most important to most celebrities who don’t love themselves as much as you do.

The things you say and do make us want to hate you. You say stupid things in interviews, and fans like me think, why?  Why do I still love this man?  Why do I keep buying his albums and listening to them on repeat, insisting that this song is a metaphor for my life?

John Mayer, you are the bad boyfriend that every girl thinks she’s over.  She tells her girlfriends, “Hah!  Even if he called me tomorrow begging me to come back, I wouldn’t do it!” Then you put out another album and I fall in love all over again.  You torture me with songs like “Say,” which is relatable to anyone in its haunting message of untold feelings. And then I agonize when you put out what may be the best ever cover of “Free Fallin’,” one of my favorite songs of all time.  It’s then that I think, he’s not so bad.  Anyone who has such a way with music can’t be that horrible, there has to be some good in there somewhere. Deep down. Waaay deep down. Read More »

Cosmo’s February issue had a lot of usefulless information, as per usual. Get excited! This month we learn how guys truly feel about nail decals (we know you’ve all been dying to know the answer to this.) Turns out 55% think they’re too over-the-top, while 45% say they’re fun and flirty. But I’m pretty sure 100% don’t really know what nail decals are, or even notice what their ladies are rocking on their fingers.

We also learn that what you’re envious of reveals what you really want in life. But didn’t we already learn this when Laguna Beach first came out and we all felt green with envy? I don’t think it took our “where-we-sit-at-lunch-defines-our-popularity-status” high school minds and an article from Cosmo to realize that we were envious because we wanted what they had. We wanted their million dollar mansions, designer name clothing, thriving social lives, and Ste-VEN in our beds. And we especially all wanted to be asked to our proms with a fish filled pool and a lit up sign. So thanks anyway, Cosmo.

But perhaps the most informative article this month is His Bedtime Body Language, in which we learn how his sleeping position tells us all we need to know about his personality.

Cosmo Says: Facedown: This guy likes to be in control.
Arielle Says: Or maybe he just likes to shove his face under the pillow so the afternoon sun doesn’t wake him from his slumber.

Cosmo Says: On His Back: His open posture shows that he’s secure and optimistic.
Arielle Says: Yeah… optimistic for a blow job! Or maybe he was watching an episode of Entourage and fell asleep halfway through. Or was reading his biology assignment and fell asleep with the book on his chest. Well, actually probably not the latter, if your man is anything like mine… Either way, the analysis of this sleeping position should really just be that he will need a nose strip; he’s going to be snoring all night. Read More »

It’s no secret that the current economic crisis had had a pretty severe impact on private universities. Not only have they lost some serious funding, but they’ve lost some serious student recruits who can no longer afford the high price of a private college education. Those universities, then, have been forced to get really crafty in their attempts to entice those incoming students to come their way.

And nothing says “Come to my school!” like a little song and dance.

Well, at least that’s what Yale thinks. They recently put together this gem to try and attract potential students, and other universities are scouring campus high and low for the theater kids and following suit (including mine).

Yes, my friends, that is a musical. A college recruitment musical. With singing and dancing and acting…and more singing. To get kids to choose Yale. Read More »

Have you ever heard a song on the radio that you were so obsessed with but didn’t know who sang it so you went home, hopped onto Google and tried to remember the lyrics so you could put them in? And then when that didn’t work you loaded your iTunes and played through the top songs of the week to see if one of them could possibly be it? And then when that didn’t work either you just kept the radio on all the time until you finally heard it again and got the band name?

Me too. And that song was Break Even by The Script. Which I downloaded. And replayed 22 times in the first two days.

I was obsessed with this new band discovery and told everyone I knew about them. At which point I discovered that they are not new at all. In fact, The Script has been wildly successful in Ireland and the U.K. for years; the U.S. was just a little slow on the uptake. But better late than never, right? Especially with a band as talented, adorable and humble as this one. I got the chance to talk to (well, email with – these guys are busy traveling the world right now!) Glen Power, the man behind the drums, about The Script’s rise to stardom. Then, obviously, I listened to Break Even a few more times as I wrote this up.

I just can’t get enough. Read More »