About Newtown, Connecticut . . . [Sugar Binge]
Our condolences and kind thoughts go out to all those trying to reconcile this unexplainable tragedy. We urge you all who remain directly unaffected to think about this horrific event in a much broader context.
Judge Says Rape Don’t Count If You Don’t Fight Back [The Apocalypse]
This needn’t any commentary. Here are the judges words straight up. Mind you this is after the criminal was charged and convicted of the following: rape, forcible oral copulation, domestic battery, stalking and making threats against his former live-in girlfriend.

MTV Censors “Vagina” Not “Whore”
MTV aired Mean Girls and censored the word “vagina” but not “whore.” Just think about it this way: can you imagine the word “penis” being censored? Of course not.
The 11 Qualities of the Perfect Woman
Men’s Health released a study where they surveyed men about what they find attractive in a woman and came up with the top 11 qualities in the “perfect woman.” You can read those here, if you want – it’s pretty offensive. It says that men want a woman who laughs at their jokes when they aren’t funny, doesn’t make more money than them, has tiny feet and big boobs (obviously).
The Pope Joins Twitter [The Apocalypse]
The Pope has jointed Twitter. Why? Well, obviously to reach a larger audience. WHY? When the apocalypse happens he will be our direct channel to Jebus who will be sending him messages on all the great hiding places for when the zombies come. Jebus knows all the good hiding places.
A Convicted Killer Plotted To Kill Justin Bieber [Sugar Binge]
Yikes. We all like to make the occasional Tweet about how the world would be better off without J-Biebz, but that is just a fantasy, guys. He is here and no matter how repetitive “Ooo Baby, ooOoo” is, no one better ever touch a hair on his perfectly Garnier-puttied head.
Hunger Games-Style Reality Series On CW?
The CW has picked up a new reality series based off the Hunger Games. I know, I know – sigh. The show will feature 12 teams of two who will be dropped into the wilderness without any food or shelter.

Around the Web

Nick & Mariah Fap To Mariah Carey [Sugar Binge]
Nick Cannon told Howard Stern that he strokes his salami to wife, Mariah Carey’s, music. That’s actually sort of nice. He should be into his wife and all those scary high notes she sings. It is a bit weird that she gets off, quite literally, on the sound of her own voice.
The Year People Listened To Women Without Rolling Their Eyes
There has been headline after headline about how 2012 has been the “Year of Women.” Some of them mean it in a nice way, while others imply that the “rise of women” equates to a war on men. You know because when people get what they have rightfully earned that means they are maliciously taking it away from everybody else – not. Sharing is caring, c’mon. Although I couldn’t be more ecstatic about the supposedly great championing achieved by my gender, I can’t help but be a tad annoyed by the sentiment or maybe just the articulation.
Proposing is Still a “Man’s Job”? [Sex in the News]
Women may be making great strides to level the playing field in terms of education, income and climbing the corporate ladder, but there’s still one game that they’re falling behind in. And this my friends, is the proposal game.
When Joking About Body Image, Where Do We Draw the Line?
Three “Fat Girls” get unfairly labelled at a California restaurant, while Caroline Wozniacki good-heartedly pokes fun at Serena Williams’ wild curves. So where do we draw the line between bullying and humor?
Ice Y U No Love Coco? [The Apocalypse]
Ice and Coco are fighting on Twitter – the gods must be meddling. I don’t if you’ve ever seen Ice Loves Coco, but you need to. There is only one conclusion to draw after watching 5 minutes of the hit reality TV series and that is: Ice, in fact, does love Coco.

This Video May Ruin All Your Memories of Grease [Current Events Cheat Sheet]
Happy Hannukah to those who observe the holiday! Does it look like winter where you are? Because it sure does NOT in New York City. I never thought I’d be wishing for colder weather, but it’s totally happening. It’s December. There is supposed to be snow on the ground! Where is my winter wonderland?! Anyway, here are the week’s top stories.