College Candy

Oh, Welcome Week. That celebration of the college lifestyle, once taken for granted and now fully appreciated after a loooooong summer at home. Apart from the slow torture that is moving into your new apartment/dorm room, the week before school starts is rife with opportunity to exercise your renewed (or newfound) freedom to be drunk whenever. you. please.

The beauty of this situation is that it does allow you to do Patron shots at 2 pm; the drawback is that it creates the perfect opportunity for you to employ some…self control. While the former is deff a fun and adventurous route (see your tagged Facebook pics for evidence), it’s not always the smartest way to kick off your fall semester. After all, there is something to be said for NOT getting knackered your first week back at school–here’s why…

5. You’ll Look Like a Freshman

Characterized by lack of regional fashion knowledge, deer-in-headlights look and–of course–INCREDIBLY inebriated state of being. Obviously, this is not what you want to look like while you’re out on the town. Even if this is your very first week in college (Congrats & welcome!), the frosh look is still one you’ll want to avoid. Instead, keep it classy, limit yourself to a few drinks (or none at all if you wish) and enjoy the amazing feeling of being a sophisticated, very adult-like lady. Read More »

Rarely while I am writing a story for CC do I find myself changing my mind about the subject halfway through. However, as I sit here with my can of sugar free Red Bull trying to muster up some energy for whatever kind of weird crowd will be at the bars during the summer on Thirsty Thursday, I had a sudden change of heart.

I’ve been spending a lot of time at music festivals this summer, like waaay more than anyone who isn’t obsessed with Jerry Garcia and The Electric Kool Aid Acid Test should, so I have run into a few very interesting characters, to say the least.

Now, I’m not saying that I’m not a whole fan of the hippie lifestyle. I’m extremely liberal and I love me some tye dye & hemp necklaces & moonshine just as much as the next chick. I just prefer to have clean underwear and hair that smells more like strawberries than Mary Jane. But the one thing I have never found appealing are the dreadlocked, banjo-playing, I-ate-way-too-many-mushrooms-once kind of crazies you run into at festivals – who basically live and breathe the whole scene.

I have a best friend; however, who is notorious for falling in lurrrve with every boy who writes her a sonnet and accompanies on his harmonica or enchants her with stories of touring with The String Cheese Incident. She’s a sucker, that’s for sure. I always wondered: How is it humanly possible that my friend who is gorgeous, intelligent & about to graduate with a B.A. going to seriously consider dating someone who is jobless, degree-less and (presumably) showerless? Read More »

Last night, I pulled up to a house I have a million times before, anxiously anticipating hanging out with my two best friends ever . You know the kind of friends I mean: We had sleepovers complete with Spice Girls’ dance parties in middle school as we sported our bell bottoms & Skechers, played spin the bottle in junior high with cute, spiky-haired 8th grade boys who listened to NOFX, and experienced a whole plethora of good/illegal/potentially lethal times in high school. These girls knew me (and stayed my friend) when I saw CREED in concert. Enough said.

So, i walked in to see my two best friends, paired up in beer pong against the dude who owned the house and someone I’ll call M. When we first met sophomore year of high school, I was fascinated by M. She was ridiculously cool, had good taste in music & the most unique style I’d ever seen. We became instant friends and I thought she would be a perfect addition to the friendship triangle. Hell, If she liked Britney Spears and gangster rap as much as we did, she was IN.

So, I brought her around a few times, giving her a chance to “test the waters” of our crazy group of friends. I was excited when she was able to hold her own in conversations. I was pretty happy (albeit, a little confused) when she started to use the nicknames we made up for each other at recess when addressing us in conversation. I loved that I could borrow her super-cute clothes. And then, something I should have totally seen coming but didn’t happened.

She stole my friends. Read More »

School is approaching, and as returning sophomores, juniors and seniors, many already know what that means. But you incoming freshmen, giddy with excitement, you probably can’t stop thinking about what adventures there are to be had on the quad, throwing Frisbees and crap. You probably don’t know what to do with yourselves during your last week in your ‘stupid, boring town.’

Let me help.

I don’t want to make college sound like incarceration, and indeed the possibilities for fun are numerous, but there many things that definitely will not happen once you arrive on campus. Here are things you should enjoy in your last week at home.

1) Quiet Time

College is noisy as balls. Normal dorms are noisy, quiet dorms are noisy, the library is noisy. The only guaranteed silence you may have at your disposal is if you’re a music student with access to sound proof booths. Everyone has speakers and they all want to share their music with you! So in your last week of boring old home, just sit outside (or in your room if outside is noisy), close your eyes, and enjoy the sound of absolutely nothing. It is soon to be replaced with ‘WOOOOOO’ and “seriously let me in I need to PEE.”

2) Food without chemicals

I would say ‘good old home cookin’ but who knows if you enjoy that. The real point here is that the food you eat on campus, while edible and in a lot of cases yummy, has a certain…difference. I don’t know if it’s a laxative, or sedative to keep students in line, but something is in the food. It’s not dangerous but it will make you take dumps 20 minutes after every meal, on the dot. The regularity is nice, but also a little worrisome. Read More »

A few weeks back, I shared a story involving me, my boyfriend and one crazy bitch. The girl refused to leave my boyfriend alone and I thought that having my boyfriend tell her to back off, then me, very forcefully, telling her to back off, would’ve been enough. Not so, people.

She didn’t get the not-so-subtle hint.

This biotch, who I’ve dubbed “Rachel” has struck again and this time, I am unsure of my next move. If telling someone to leave you alone doesn’t do the trick, what will?!

So, I am enlisting the help of my fellow CC-ers to steer me in the right direction. Below are some plans of action that I am considering. I need your unbiased opinions to help me make the right next move and get rid this crazy girl once and for all.

I could confront her, again. This time, face to face, in public, so she has no way of hiding behind her phone or computer and her naïve little, “I’m too good for everyone” façade will be shattered into a million little pieces. Read More »

So you enter your freshman year of college a confident single gal (or guy) ready to take on your new independent lifestyle and hopefully meet some hotties. The first week of college you meet someone who you happen to really hit it off with. A few weeks later, you’re still talking to this special someone and you start to wonder where this is all going.

But is it really a good idea to start dating someone you’ve only known for two weeks into your freshman year?

In my experience, no.

Freshman year is all about new experiences, whether it be living with someone you don’t know or having to do your laundry for the first time. While the idea of meeting a new boyfriend or girlfriend is exciting, the first semester of college might not be the best time to start thinking of a long term relationship.

I met a guy during the summer at one of my school’s orientations and I continued to talk to him once we met up in the fall. We started hooking up almost immediately after classes began and I wondered if he was feeling as strongly as I was about him. I soon realized, as he hooked up with multiple other girls, that there really were no feelings involved on his part. He announced that it was no big deal since he and I weren’t officially anything and he didn’t want anything serious his first year. I was hurt because I had read too much into the situation. Even more, though, I was angry at myself because I could have spent the time getting to know other people (or studying) instead of hanging out with him. Read More »

A couple of weeks ago, when my cell phone (endearingly named Dino, since it was probably manufactured during the Jurassic Period) finally went kaput, I sprang for one of those nifty phones with the keyboard – for optimal texting, as the salesperson put it. Since I’d been growing increasingly fond of texting, I figured the keyboard feature would make sending out messages more convenient. But little did I know that I was about to go from casual messenger to a total texting addict.

Yes, I admit it. I really, really like to text. I do it all the time: under the table at restaurants, during the previews of movies. Sometimes I even stop in transit to send out a text (I don’t have the hand-eye coordination to walk and text at the same time. Not yet, at least). While I try not to be rude with my texting, I can’t help but love this new development in communication.

But before you condemn me to the ring of hell reserved for the intellectually degenerating and socially awkward teenage population, hear me out. As an aspiring writer and self-proclaimed grammar Nazi, there are some lines I refuse to cross when it comes to texting. I never use abbreviations, except for the occasional “lol.” With my old phone, that made writing out one text an all-day affair, but with my handy keyboard, it’s a snap. And that annoying, pointless one-word text that makes you want to reach into your phone and punch the person who sent it? I won’t send it. Ever. I get way too many of them as it is; I won’t subject any of my friends to that type of agony.

My reason for texting is restricted to simple convenience. Read More »

When CC recently published a post about long-term relationships, I was really impressed by the lengths of time some of you guys divulged you’ve been with your partners. Rock on! I see how the single life can be fun, but as a girl who really would rather poke her eyes out with Popsicle sticks than have a different hookup every week, it’s so nice to know that there are others out there who are happy with their long-term relationships.

People say life is boring when you’re in a really long relationship, but who are they kidding? Personally, I’ve never been happier. I love my long-term relationship because:

1. I have a built-in best friend.

Probably not everyone is best friends with their significant other, but I think a lot of people in long-term relationships are. I don’t always think about my boyfriend in a romantic way—sometimes I just think of him as someone who I want to call and share my good news with or someone who I want to hang out with because I know for sure that he can make me laugh. He’s always there for me, and not just as somebody to love, but as a true best friend.

2. I don’t have to be perfect.

When you’re in it for the long haul, you don’t always have to put your best foot forward. I remember having first (and second, and third) dates with people where I felt like I had to try my best to be funny and pretty and all-around wonderful. Since I have been with my boyfriend for several years and countless dates, both he and I know that I’m not always that way (he isn’t perfect, either, of course), and we’re OK with that. Sometimes I’m grumpy or rude or not very good-looking, and he just doesn’t care. It makes me feel so happy. Read More »

What a miserable train wreck, composed of C-list talent, constantly creative combinations of four letter words, the overuse of prescription drugs, volumes of offensive mutterings and creepy Full House pedophilia jokes. Ah, but hell, it’s funny.It’s like a car wreck – you know you shouldn’t look, but you can’t help yourself. Comedy Central Roasts are always a hot mess – a crew of C-list pseudo-stars drinking heavily and tearing each other apart all the while dropping f-bombs and vulgar sexual references. Perhaps part of the allure lies in the chance to see offensive and inappropriate behavior in a societal sea of politeness.

Bob Saget, the highly irritating Danny Tanner and silly video voiceover dude we all grew up hating, was clearly a last-ditch choice after thousands of other actual celebrities turned down the chance to be roasted. The last poor sap to accept the offer was Flavor Flav- how can you top that kind of celebrity star power? Yes, I’m being sarcastic, but the pinnacle of comedy has to be Snoop Dogg referring to the little clock-wearing freak as a cracked out midget in a Viking helmet.

Pretty-boy John Stamos and the rest of the Full House cast were there, sans the Olsen Twins of course, who were the topic of many sexual/ eating disorder/ molestation/ pedophilia jokes. An aging Uncle Joey, Aunt Becky, DJ and Stephanie peppered the crowd with other random has-beens like the guy from Quantum Leap. Read More »

(Last week one of our writers opened up about her personal use of Adderall. We have since received tons of feedback regarding Adderall and the many ways it is used. Here is another coed’s story…)

Sunday night at 3 a.m. again. The lines on the page have long since run together. I have written the same sentence three times. My roommate is blaring the television set that is constantly tuned to E!. I have seen all of the True Hollywood stories. Twice.

“Bailey*, can I have an Adderall?”

“Sure. You know where to find them.”

I rummaged around in the clutter of her desk drawer, and my fingertips having connected with the plastic of a prescription bottle, I tipped a tiny capsule into my palm.

Ah, yes, here was my chemical savior. Focus city, here I come.

This amphetamine derivative was going to help me get through my stack of reading and get that assignment down on paper.

I lay back down on my bed and set my alarm for 4 a.m. With Adderall in my system I would be able to get back up in just an hour and get back to work. And I did. Read More »