I hate to go all crazy department store on you (It’s January 28th? Time to set up a Memorial Day swimsuit display!) but the fashion industry is always 6 months ahead of us normal folk. The elite designers of the trade have challenged us with innovative, advanced looks that put oh-so 2011 trends, like flare legged jeans and feathers, to shame. What? You can’t afford Roberto Cavalli? No worries fellow broke college students; I’ve recreated the looks with budget friendly brands. Prepare to rock 2012 with these inventive spring trends:
Taking Your Style From Comfort Zone to Couture
So Here’s What’s Happening in Iowa Today
Today is Iowa Caucus day! It’s more important than almost anything else happening today (unless Beyoncé finally pops) and we want you to know exactly what’s going on. I mean, today’s outcome could determine who will run against Obama and who could be our next president.
While we could put together a cutesy little gallery telling you which of the Republican candidates looks best topless, we think you’re smarter than that. We think you want real news, right? That’s why we’ve put together a list of the blogs that know exactly what’s happening in Iowa and can explain it to you in a way that you’ll understand.
A minute by minute guide to what’s going down in Iowa today (Politico)
Who is winning the expectations game (Buzzfeed)
Live updates from the caucus (Huffington Post)
A live Twitter feed giving you all the latest news (CNN)
Election news from our most conservative reporters (Fox News)
So go read up on the latest news and then come back here and tell us who you think is going to win and why.
Candy Dish: The Year of the Movie
Most anticipated movies of 2012
Celebs who’ve played real people
Elle Fanning is the classic younger sister
Enough with the self-hate
New Years resolutions for the single lady
Lindsay has some trespasser issues
Is a strap-on the key to refreshing your relationship?
Getting Taylor Swifts cute and simple look
You don’t owe him anything
Candy Dish: Teenage Nightmare
What’s the story behind Russel and Katy?
You know you always wanted a Facebook bed
Couples who met on the set
Celeb resolutions for 2012
What’s your theme for 2012?
Are you addicted to social media
You’re not a true Potterhead unless you wipe with Dan Rad
How did your favorite celebs ring in the New Year?
Look who’s turning 30 this year!
3 Things to do Instead of Going Out on New Year’s Eve
Let me just state the obvious to start off — New Year’s Eve is overrated. Everyone always gets stressed out and anxiety-ridden making plans and picking outfits for a holiday that is usually a let down anyway. With Hollywood setting up unrealistic expectations for what a New Year’s Eve kiss should really be like, we wake up on January 1st with a hangover and blurry memories of a sloppy makeout session we had with a stranger.
So why not just stay home for a cozy night in? You’ll save tons of money that would either be spent on a ridiculously expensive cover charge or an overpriced little black dress. This New Year’s Eve, I will be staying in instead of walking around the bitterly cold streets of Chicago in a mini skirt and platforms, and I could not be happier about it. There are tons of ways to stay in and still have fun on New Year’s, and here are just a few.
Maxim Says the Darndest Things: July Edition
July is one of my favorite months of the entire year. And not because Maxim finally gets a chance to pimp out articles encouraging men to go to work without pants (just because it’s balmy out), and Rosie Huntington-Whiteley can prance around desolate beaches wearing studded jean shorts that would only fit a midget or a Hollister manikin. (Let’s just say I could see some cheekie cheek.)
Just in case Maxim readers are ever bored at work, we learned how to shove a water bottle in an office chair so your co-worker will have the instant sensation of peeing themselves upon sitting down. Whatever, whoever is gone long enough to allow a co-worker to do something so atrocious deserves to think they peed their pants. And needs to stop eating Bangin’ Burritos from the gas station and stay sitting at their desk for a while.
In Maxim’s newest favorite article ‘Maxim Office Assistant’ they interviewed the new prospect office contender. Lucky for all the horny toads in any man-child’s dream office – upcoming office assistant, Carissa, shares she thinks it’s sexy to pick up orders and move boxes in nothing but a jacket and sexy lingerie. Looks like I’m never going to make the cut for sexy assistant. Since the last time I moved a box in a trench coat and frilly undies from Charlotte Russe was in a vivid nightmare. Read More »
Dear President Obama: Please Don’t Mess This Up; Our Country Needs You.
Dear President Barack Obama,
I know you’re just moments away from being inaugurated, but in my opinion, the Bush era has been dead for awhile now, and you have been the prez since the results were announced. I figured out how to fill out an absentee ballot for you, Mr. Obama, and I can’t even handle bills that come in paper statements, so that’s saying something. The day you were elected, Mr. Obama, my roommate and I screamed and jumped up and down on our futon like we’d just watched a really hot episode of Gossip Girl. One of my friends from the bloody United Kingdom texted me to congratulate me on our country’s finally making a good decision, even though it was about 4 a.m. in his time zone.
There’s a lot riding on your presidency, Mr. Obama, and while I have enough faith in you to fill out that freaking absentee ballot, I would also like to give you some tips, so you take the same downtrodden path that so many of our past leaders have taken. Read More »
Candy Dish: Margaritas + Popsicles = Delish

The perfect poolside addition to a summer afternoon
Coupon Clipping: not just for groceries anymore.
You mean it does more than make me lose my inhibitions, dinner and dignity?
If Gossip Girl gets canceled my life will be over.
Two more reasons to love Bret and Jemaine.
Do you think Lassie wore condoms?
Just grin and bear it, Tony. …Or Poppa Joe will find a way to hunt you down.
5 Superhero movie scenes NOT coming to a theater near you.
Bootleg moonshine, courtesy of the Tufts class of 2012 (way to prioritize, guys!)



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