Miss South Carolina definitely didn’t do herself any favors when it came to answering a simple question about maps and education, but unfortunately, she’s not the only idiot in our midst.

Recently, TMZ took a break from reporting on Britney and Paris to showcase the some of the brainpower walking around San Diego State University. Christian author and activist (and fundamentalist-devil-conspiracy person) Mark Dice gave his “the devil is the REAL terrorist!” rhetoric a rest and tried to interview students at SDSU about the year 9/11 happened.

Maybe these students knew who the possibly insane Dice (“formally known” as John Conner) was and didn’t trust him, or maybe they truly were as stupid as they come across on his video.

Either way, I think this proves our educational system needs more than just geography lessons.

It’s official – Paris Hilton is out of jail after a less than 72 hour stint. Also, and quite sadly, it proves that celebrities can get away with ANYTHING if they put their money to it…i mean mind…my bad Dr. Freud.The reason for the early release? Last time I checked, telling everyone “That’s hot!” was not grounds for early release. OH NO, Paris Hilton was released due to over-crowding. Hate to be melodramatic, but not since the freeing of Barabbas has their been such a tragic miscarriage of justice.

Look – I am not saying we hang her, but little primadona trust-fund babies need to learn than the world has consequences. We are not only doing them a disservice, but every American that pays taxes and relies on the justice system has just been fisted by the LA judicial system. I am sure they are excited about the new Hilton Municipal Recreation Center that her Mommy and Daddy will be building for LA in 5 months, but overcrowding??? SHE HAD A PRIVATE CELL FOR F*&^SAKE! Was it too small for her and her liver?

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I understand that school systems all over the country are trying to fight back, but this could be a little overboard.

There used to be a point where teachers were a source of knowledge and wisdom that transcended their role of disciplinarian. Now, teachers are more sex crazed and mentally unbalanced than half the students out there!

In case you haven’t heard, in Murfreesboro, TN, a group of teachers turned an elementary school class trip into an episode of 24. These models for academia, yelled out to the scared 6th grade children, that this was not a test, and that they need to hide under anything they could find. Furthermore, these teachers never even informed any parents or chaperones of their planned festivities. To add the realistic allure of the shake-down, 2 teachers branded real unloaded handguns. Luckily, the Assistant Principal was in on it and thought it would be a learning experience.

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I finally got it…

I spent half the night in shock, kicking back a box of my favorite wine with my “results show buddy” (such a queen, but fun to watch with). The truth was revealed and the whole campus fell into a deep silence. It was the deep kind of silence that only comes with the discovery of a great cosmic truth.

The Sanjob is still here. People are fasting! Global warming is spreading! Plagues, famine, disease – I have read of these signs before.

I kindly asked my friend to leave and I sat in pure contemplation…

What evil hellspawn would bring this upon us? Republicans? Democrats? Terrorists? Borat? That damn crying girl from the performance?

The answer? It’s a consipiracy. Sanjaya is being kept on the show to get a rise out of all of us. They want his girliness to haunt the guys and his terrible do to disgust the girls.

Touche, American Idol. Touche.

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