It’s official – Paris Hilton is out of jail after a less than 72 hour stint. Also, and quite sadly, it proves that celebrities can get away with ANYTHING if they put their money to it…i mean mind…my bad Dr. Freud.The reason for the early release? Last time I checked, telling everyone “That’s hot!” was not grounds for early release. OH NO, Paris Hilton was released due to over-crowding. Hate to be melodramatic, but not since the freeing of Barabbas has their been such a tragic miscarriage of justice.

Look – I am not saying we hang her, but little primadona trust-fund babies need to learn than the world has consequences. We are not only doing them a disservice, but every American that pays taxes and relies on the justice system has just been fisted by the LA judicial system. I am sure they are excited about the new Hilton Municipal Recreation Center that her Mommy and Daddy will be building for LA in 5 months, but overcrowding??? SHE HAD A PRIVATE CELL FOR F*&^SAKE! Was it too small for her and her liver?

Overcrowding is not defined as a party of one, but rather a gross overpopulation in a very confined area. Paris in a room the size of my studio apt – is not a crowd. If there is an issue, how about ridiculous marijuana possession “convicts”? According to sources, over half a million people are arrested a year for having miniscule amounts of pot – yet this skank and her dopey-assed binge-and-purge socialite friends drink and drive like it’s an Olympic sport and get away with it.

I throw the bullshit flag! If one of us got caught (after multiple infractions no less), we would be running our tin-can up and down the bars of our local country jail for MUCH longer then the slap on the wrist she received in the first place! The point is, once we as a society establish a double standard for celebrities to commit generally accepted crimes – where does it end?

Ok, OJ aside – and R-Kelly and MJ aside – right…then there was Charlie Sheen and Robert Downey, Jr. – dammit, Mel Gibson got away with it too…

Fine, you win celebrities – we as a public are f*&^ed. It’s true, as a group you are able to commit any crime with zero backlash. Maybe you lose some PR points, but we are fickle and forget about it as soon as you do some stupid-assed PSA about the dangers of whatever crime you committed. Kudoes…I guess.

Sad though, what the hell is this teaching 10 year olds about justice? I mean, I am old enough to KNOW I should be outraged, am I just bitter or does anyone else thing this is a travashamockery?!

paris hilton

I just recently came across this great list—The Drunk Tank; 10 Wasted Celebrities—and man, are these clips fuuuuunnnny. While I’ve seen many of them before (who didn’t see Paula Abdul off her rocker on live morning television), to have them all in one place is such a good laugh.

Personal favorites? Puff Daddy, or P Diddy, or—what is he called now?—talking about ProActiv. He’s not nearly as hard core when he’s had a few wine coolers. Brit Brit having a drunken convo with K-Fed. She should really just never, never talk unless she’s singing. Never. And my number one? Ben Affleck wasted during an interview trying to get the host into bed. I don’t know what’s better about this one—him being all over her, or the fact that she wants so badly to do him when the camera shuts off.

So, on this lovely spring day, please enjoy the public displays of drunkenness. And on your next night out, remember no one is safe with camera phones and YouTube in the mix!