Two weeks ago, I heard another tragic tale of a girl I know punching her boyfriend. A year before that, the same thing happened. Call me crazy, but this type of behavior, in my book, is never okay. And I’m speaking to both sexes here.

Personally, I don’t think I could ever, EVER be in a relationship where any type of abusive behavior existed. I also know that no one ever willingly puts themselves into these types of situations because feelings and emotions complicate things, but when I see or hear about that kind of behavior, it honestly drives me crazy.

Is it naïve of me to ask how another human being could knowingly inflict pain onto someone they care about? And what is the point of it? You hit your boyfriend to shut him up, why not just kick him out of the car? Who are you to deem it appropriate to lay your hands on another adult? Who gave you that right?

I suppose the line is blurred when it comes to raising children: do you punish them by spanking or hitting? But really, where do you draw the line? Because I think that parents reserve some right to discipline you and put you in your place, but significant others? No. I’m sorry. I just can’t excuse that.

The door to abusive behaviors led me straight through to a few other intolerable relationship behaviors. And then those led me forward to a few more… Read More »

Relationships can be great — always having someone to cuddle with, vent to, and share your favorite things with – but unfortunately things don’t always go as smoothly as planned. Sometimes once you get to know a person — once you spend more than a few month’s worth of sexy nights with them — you realize that maybe things aren’t all they’re cracked up to be.

Let’s get really honest for a second — most of us have stayed in a relationship or two far past its expiration date. Sometimes we get too blinded by the bright shiny light of love to realize when a relationship has become toxic and needs to be over. Breaking up isn’t easy, I know, but sometimes you’ve gotta do what you’ve gotta do.

If you’re having problems figuring out whether to stay or go, here are some things that scream “it’s over”… or should be.

Abuse. Under no circumstances should you be staying with a person who is emotionally, physically, or sexually abusive. You can do better, I promise. If your partner is hurting you in any way, get out — and fast. If you need some help, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or 1-800-787-3224 (TTY).

Lack of respect. For you, your space, your family, your friends, your dreams, the list goes on. Respect is one of the most basic of things you should be expecting from a significant other, and if that’s not there it’s time to pack your bags. Read More »

Last June, collegiate students nationwide were silenced by shock and sadness after news of the murder of UVA lacrosse star Yeardley Love surfaced. Article after article proceeded to litter the Internet about Love and George Huguely’s relationship, many claiming there had been telltale signs that his violent temper would lead to serious danger. However, what Love should have specifically done about those telltale signs to avoid her tragic end remained unanswered.

Love’s heartbreaking death gained immense media attention. The fact that two collegiate athletes, enrolled at a prestigious university, were involved in such a catastrophic and horrific event blew the minds of the media. However, their tumultuous relationship, soaked with alcohol-fueled fights, is far from exceptional.

In college, at least 32% of females have been involved in an abusive relationship of some kind. Although the abuse can be categorized as physical or emotional, it is equally disturbing in either form. The stories of abuse will never don the cover of People magazine or be number one on Google trends. But, they deserve just as much attention and concern as Love and Huguely’s relationship.

Abusive relationships are tricky, especially at this age. There are copious resources at universities that protect victims from terrible outcomes. But, students are often too scared to tell on their partner or friend’s partner because the social repercussions would be terrible.

For instance, a friend of mine had been dating a boy for several months. After a debaucherous night, he “accidentally” struck her across the face. At the time of the event, I was livid. I talked with her and begged her to leave him, but I did nothing beyond that. He went to AA, claiming the alcohol had caused his problems, and vowed to never hurt my friend again.

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It’s hard not to pay attention to all the Rihanna news that has been circulating lately. I’ve read it in the newspapers, in the tabloids, on the gossip sites, I’ve talked about it with my friends and even my professors, and still it’s hard to wrap my head around. It’s difficult to see anyone going through a hard time, but when it’s someone you have grown to admire and respect, it becomes that much more difficult.

There have been a number of issues that have been bothering me in the last few weeks that have followed the Chris Brown/Rihanna incident. It bothers me that her picture was released and splashed all over the place, it bothers me that Chris Brown showed little remorse after the alleged attack, and it bothered me that Rihanna went back to her attacker. But most of all, it bothered me that people are now turning on Rihanna and blaming her for what happened. Read More »