1. I put on sweats, grab a blanket and settle in front of my couch for the day/night/month.
2. I eat a box of Oreos smothered in peanut butter.

Ok, I’ll be honest – I do both. And usually polish off the jar of pb with a spoon.

I used to think that those nights made me feel better because of the intense sugar rush all that quality programming (read: Food Network challenges) distracted me from my personal issues, but a new study is saying that watching TV actually cures loneliness.

According to a series of studies performed at the University at Buffalo and Miami University of Ohio, people feel personally connected to the characters they watch on TV, so much so that it is like they are actually a part of whatever is going on week after week. These “relationships” fulfill them (much like my Oreo/pb combo fulfills me) and their need for personal contact.

So, basically, my long stints in front of the TV take away my loneliness not because they are distracting me from it, but because I feel as if I am right there with Bobby Flay cooking up a 6 course meal with a crazy secret ingredient in 60 minutes. And we are totally BFF.

I can sorta see the truth in this – lord knows I talk about LC and Audrina like we are all living together and crushing on the Brodester – but it all seems so sad. Do people really think that they are part of Blair Waldorf’s latest scheme? Do they really stop questioning the fact that they have 9 cats and a crazy knitting hobby because they feel so close to Pam and Jim on The Office?

And maybe people wouldn’t be so lonely if they LEFT THE HOUSE ONCE IN AWHILE INSTEAD OF SITTING HOME AND WATCHING TV. (Caps were used to emphasize my point…to myself.)

Oh well. At least I know I don’t need the 4,327 calorie snack I’ve been downing to get over the lonely blues. One episode of Ace of Cakes should do the trick.