I’ve been in the workforce for a while now (I know this because I can no longer sleep past 8 on weekends, a sign that my body is on a real-person schedule). Long gone are the days of opting out of my responsibilities in favor of nursing a hangover and staying out late on weeknights. Instead, I am in bed by 10pm and hunched over a desk for 10 hours a day no matter how crappy I’m feeling.

Besides the paychecks I’ve been depositing for the past 3 years, I’ve taken away quite a few things from my time on the job. Namely, a few very important lessons (learned the hard way) of what is and is not acceptable in a professional environment.

You starting a new job soon? Keep these few things in mind:

1. Your boss is not your friend.
When I started working for a company owned by some family friends, I got pretty tight with the boys in charge. We’d shoot the sh*t during the day, grab drinks together after work and got really close, really fast. It was nice having friends in the office as it gave me something to look forward to every day, but no matter how many shots we took together, those boys were still my bosses and it got increasingly difficult to remember that. As time went on, it got extremely difficult to work together in a professional manner and everything eventually went to hell…. And I had to quit. It is fine to have a jovial relationship with your boss, but there is a line and you better be careful not to cross it.

2. Going to work hungover is not OK.
Happy hours are fun, but holding back the vomit while on a very important conference call is not. Be careful with the weeknight drinking. In this economy, you don’t want to give your bosses any reason to give you the boot.

3. The people in charge aren’t as dumb as they look.
My BFF got me tickets to a concert out of town on a Thursday night. I really wanted to go, so I decided I’d skip town after work and just call in sick the next morning. I woke up early, put on my best “I’ve been up all night with food poisoning” voice and left a VM at the office. Those guys saw right through it, which they let me know in a very serious one-on-one meeting on Monday morning. Lying doesn’t pay, so suck it up and take a personal day/vacation day if you’ve got something better to do.

4. They are always watching.
Thanks to the wonders of technology, the big men in charge can see what you are doing all the time, regardless if they can see your screen. Just be aware of that as you blog about how much you hate your job (guilty), spend 3 hours shopping on Zappos (guilty), or look at some questionable content online (sigh…guilty).

5. You are on their schedule, not the other way around.
It’s hard getting used to the daily grind of real life and when I first started working I tried tirelessly to fit everything into my schedule. When an after-hours work meeting meant I wouldn’t make it to my Spinning class, I kindly asked the boss if we could reschedule for the next day. Apparently, that wasn’t an appropriate question (as made evident by the desk-pounding, loud voices and advice to look for another job). You work for them, woman, no matter how inconvenient is for your life.  Don’t forget that.

The only thing more stressful than graduating from college is finding that first apartment after graduation. I remember my first apartment hunt like it was yesterday. There was a lot of running, a lot of crying and a sh*t ton of begging my parents for money so I could afford to live in something that had closets and wasn’t a closet. After an emotionally draining 2 weeks of hunting, I finally found something.

And had to pay some dude $2,000 for it because he happened to unlock it for me when I went to see it.

My apartment was great… on the surface. In fact, it wasn’t until I moved in that I realized all the questions I neglected to ask. (Namely, “Does the family downstairs cook with road kill daily?”) Questions that were vital to truly finding the right apartment for my life. So, here are a few pointers for you, recent grads. The rules aren’t the same in every city, but I guarantee you will benefit from what I have to share.

1. Make a List: Not just a mental one, either. Write an actual list of the things you MUST have in an apartment and cannot live without. Not only will this serve as a checklist as you enter each apartment, but it will also keep you from getting side tracked by any temptations (a wine fridge? Fancy, but do you really need to chill that Boones Farm?) an apartment may have.

2. Get Advice: So, you may think ample closet space/proximity to a liquor store is the most important thing for your new place (and they both totes are for me), but you may also not realize the importance of some other amenities. Say, proximity to a grocery store. Or a laundry facility. Or a hospital. Being that we’ve never really lived on our own before, there are a lot of things we may not realize we need. Your parents do, so be sure to ask for their advice in the apartment hunting process.

3. Set Your Limit and Be Realistic: This may not be the case everywhere, but if you are moving into a big city the real estate agents can be, well, a-holes. The more expensive the apartment they put you in, the more money they make. And lord knows they will try and get you into the most expensive place they can think of. Don’t try to impress them by setting your rent limit higher than you can afford and don’t let them show you places you know are too much. You will be wasting your time or, worse, getting your heart set on something that will send you deep. into. debt. And it is not worth it. Speak up and make sure they know what you want and what you can afford.

4. Be Prepared: When you go out on that apartment hunt, be prepared. Bring a notebook, some check stubs, your social security card, checkbook and most recent bank statement. Some apartments go fast, so if you want it you will need to act on the spot. And that means proving your worth to that real estate company ASAP.

5. Be Mentally Prepared: This may not be true for all of you, but some of you are about to be very surprised about what apartments are like after college. It is not going to be like Friends (that apartment would be like $6,000 a month in NYC!) or that beauty of a place on How I Met Your Mother. In fact, it may be more like Harry Potter’s room under the stairs. The truth is, your first apartment will probably be small and cramped and over-priced. As long as you know that going in, you will be fine. If you’re expecting 2,000 square feet and a jacuzzi tub…well, prepare to be disappointed.

Also, be ready to scream/cry/drink heavily. Apartment hunting is not for the weak, so (wo)man up and find yourself somewhere to live. Just don’t forget to look for closets! I didn’t realize I was without them until my boxes were lining the walls and I had nowhere to hand my clothes.

When you are in college it’s almost as if you have to try not to make friends. You are constantly surrounded by people and put into situations (group projects, student groups, beer pong tournaments) where forming new friendships is as easy as finding Milwaukee’s Best at a frat party; get their name, work with them a bit, then go home and Facebook them later.

Unfortunately, the same can’t be said for life in the real world.

Not only are you no longer on a campus surrounded by 400-5,000 people just like you, but the situations that present themselves in college aren’t available after you graduate. At least not as easily. And, no, it’s not going to be like Friends where you live in some giant and totally cool apartment and have hot, funny, and really awesome dudes living across the hall. Not even close.

You can’t walk up to some random girl at the bar and ask for her number (really, really creepy), so how the hell do you make new friends!?

Well, first, you need to realize things won’t come as easily and be ready to put in a little work. Once you’ve mentally prepared, it’s time to put forth some effort:

1. Get friendly at work: The most obvious place to make friends is at work. You spend so much time with these people that it makes sense that you’d get close with them. This is great because it gives you something to look forward to when you wake up at the ass crack of dawn every morning, but it can also be ugly. It’s very easy to blur the line between friend and coworker (especially when $3 tequila shots are the happy hour special) and that can lead to some very awkward interactions down the road. If you play your cards right, though, you’ll make some awesome friends for life.

2. Join something: Be it a community service group, a summer sports league, or a book club, joining a group is one of the best ways to make new friends. You will meet tons of people you wouldn’t normally have access to, you’ll automatically have something in common with them, and you’ll get to know them in a pretty relaxed setting so it doesn’t feel so forced and awk. (The internet makes this shiz super easy, too. Just Google what you’re looking for – “book club, New York City” – and you’ll find plenty of options.)

3. Use your alumni association: People tend to get really attached to their alma maters (and fellow alum) after they graduate. This is great because those same people get super active in their alumni association and plan fun happy hours and events in cities nationwide.  Just look up your city to find a calendar of events and go! You may think you know everyone that graduated with you, but you’re wrong. There are plenty of cool people to be met.

4. Friends of friends: The best referral source for new friends? The few you’ve already got. Ask your friends to facilitate pre-parties or dinners with everyone they know so you can get to know them too. Yes, it seems a little strange to kinda latch onto someone else’s friends, but you already know they are quality people, so why not try and get to know them better?

You aren’t going to find new friends at the bar or sitting around your apartment so get out there and do something. A little effort will reap huge rewards in the form of new brunch buddies, new girls to confide in, and some memorable new experiences.

After the novelty of college graduation (and all the great gifts that came with it) wore off, I spent a year crying myself to sleep. And I’m not exaggerating. While being done with school after 16 years was pretty liberating, not knowing what was coming next scared the sh*t out of me. And the fact that no one ever warned me how difficult being an adult would be made things a whole lot harder.

I went through a lot that first year – looking for a job, moving to a new city, ending a long relationship, and learning how to care for myself, to name a few – all by myself and now feel that I have the experience and knowledge to advise others on the transition. Because it’s a hard one and every college grad should know that they are not alone. Come back every week for another nugget of information to help you survive in the big, bad world.

My commencement speaker, like most commencement speakers, spent 25 minutes telling my graduating class about the endless possibilities in the real world. He spoke of our bright futures, giving back, and making the world a better place.  The speech was inspiring, but now that I’m on the other side of the cap and gown, I wish he had gone in another direction.

Perhaps he could have taken a more realistic approach and warned us of how hard that first year after college was going to be. And that it was OK to be really, really unhappy.

When you’re a college senior, life after college seems like a glamorous world filled with an awesome new job, an awesome new city, and a bright, successful future. You see all those people who graduated before you living it up and enjoying their new place in the real world.

The reality, though, isn’t quite so bright and cheery. The truth: that first year out of college isn’t always so easy. In fact, it’s pretty sh*tty.

College is a big tease. Someone up above plopped you onto a playground and introduced you to tons of really great friends. You had 4 years to play around, get into trouble, and worry about no one but yourself. Fast forward to graduation and it’s all taken away. Your friends are spread all over the country, you (hopefully) have a 9-5 job, bills, and a lot of new responsibilities.

Let me tell you: it’s overwhelming, it’s hard and it’s pretty effing awful. And it’s totally OK to feel that way. In fact, the hardest part about my first year out of college was the fact that no one ever warned me. Here I was, living in New York City, crying myself to sleep every night. I felt like a loser, like the only person in the world who couldn’t seem to find my place.

But that wasn’t the case at all. The truth was, everyone was feeling that way; we were all just too scared to admit it.  Ask anyone now – 4 years after college – and they will tell you that the first year was the hardest they’ve ever had. All those changes, all those rejections, and doing it all completely alone.

Why am I telling you this? No, it’s not to scare you. It’s because I truly believe that I wouldn’t have spent 6 months spontaneously crying on a New York City subway if someone had warned me; if others shared their experiences with me so I didn’t feel so alone; if I had any idea that it was OK to be a college graduate with no freaking clue what I was doing.

Because it is.

As much as college prepares us for careers in the real world, it doesn’t prepare us for real life. Feeling lost is ok. Feeling confused is ok. Not knowing what you want to do with your life is OK. All those feelings are completely normal and I promise you are not the only one feeling them.

The college-to-real-world transition is a difficult one. For everyone. You aren’t the only one totally stressed out about finding work, finding friends, or finding your place. You aren’t the only one doing a job you know you are overqualified for. You aren’t the only one wondering if you made a mistake when you chose your major in college. That is all completely normal.

Just breathe, take it one day at a time and, before you know it, you’ll be a fully functioning adult. I didn’t believe it would happen either, but here I am, dry eyed and happy. You will make it, and if you cry along the way, that’s totally OK.

Whether it’s a summer job, internship, or, if you’re graduating like I am, an entry-level position into a career, finding a job is a top priority.  However, we all know that isn’t as easy as we’d like it to be.  Competition for jobs is higher than ever with the tough job market we’re in, which is why you have to stand out in the sea off all the other job/internship applicants out there.

But before you purchase some sort of ridiculous costume or do the dirty with your interviewer in attempts to stick out in his or her mind, try a few of these more professional ideas:

1.  Network, network, network – You’ve heard it before, and I’m telling you again: networking is one of the most important things you can do when it comes to helping you get a job.  Think you don’t have connections?  Think again.  Reach out to everyone you know–professors, friends, coworkers, your parents–you never know who has info on great job openings. There are also tons of online groups catered to all sorts of fields that set up networking events in cities across the country. Sign up and go to these; you will meet tons of people in your field that can help you out down the road.

2. Utilize your school’s career center – Sometimes universities get job listings that don’t go into public listings.  You may not find anything the first time, but keep checking, because new jobs open up all the time.  Plus, your career center can offer more than just job listings.  Depending on your university, you can get career counseling, have your resume checked, and even do mock interviews.

3. Social networking sites - You may use Facebook to see what everyone was up to for the past 6 minutes, but it offers a lot more, combining the whole idea of networking with the fact that you can find pretty much anything on the internet.  People have found jobs on Facebook, Myspace, Twitter and, of course, the old standby, Craigslist.  Even though these job listings are accessible to a lot more people than those at your university’s career center, don’t underestimate what you might find. But, don’t take the lazy approach to applying either. Thousands of other people will also be vying for these positions, so you must go above and beyond to stand out: research the company, send digital and paper copies of your application, follow up with a thank-you-note, etc.

4.  Make your own website - In such a terrible job market, many people are turning to drastic measures to get noticed by employers.  Making a website with your qualifications (like a resume) is a great way to stand out. It proves you are innovative, savvy, creative, and a whiz on the computer. Plus, it saves the planet; less paper!

5. Network some more – Seriously, it’s that important. Those adults weren’t lying when they said it’s all about who you know. You know how hard it is to sound good on paper, so meeting people in person is 1,000 times more effective than having an impressive resume. Make connections anywhere you can and you will have a major leg-up on your competition.

Take these tips to heart and good luck in your job search!