Many of you will be stepping onto campus this upcoming fall, finally free of your parents. It’s your first year of college, and you just can’t wait to be free and come home late….or not at all make your own decisions. What you don’t realize, however, is how much those parental units have done for you while you were living at home. And trust me – this is something you’ll realize fast.

So I’ve compiled a list of eight things every college student should know how to do now that they aren’t living with their parents. Prepare yourselves, people. If you don’t know how to do these things, either learn now or make friends who do and are willing to do it for you to teach you.

1. Laundry – Obviously you are going to have to do this some time or another. No matter how big your closet is, how many pairs of underwear you stock up on, or how many times you spray Febreeze on your jeans, eventually you are going to need to come face to face with the industrial washing machine. And when you do, you better believe you’ll want to be prepared so you don’t end up with teeny, tiny jeans and Jungle-Juice stained halter tops.

2. How to iron – For those job fairs, semi-formals, and when you didn’t feel like putting your clean laundry back in the drawers and left them sitting in your laundry basket for weeks on end.

3. Safe sex – Duh. Put a raincoat on, and pop that pill. Also, get tested. Because like they say in The Hangover, “that sh*t will come back with you.” Read More »

When I started college my freshman year, I was NOT a drinker. I repeat: I was not a drinker.

After having, literally, maybe three beers all of high school (not a prude, just didn’t care for the taste of what was given to me), I came into college a drinking virgin and very quickly had to learn what my limit was. (Basically, by exceeding my limit night after night after night…) I had to learn what I liked to drink, how much and how frequently.

After downing five shots of Rubinoff in ten minutes and blacking out, punching my roommate in the face, puking all over the communal bathroom, changing in front of a guy friend of mine and destroying my laundry clothes rack (after falling into it), I knew I had to take this experiment with drinking a little differently. So I made a few rules.

In order to spare you from the same embarassment and loss of precious laundry racks, I thought it was a good idea to share these rules with you. You can follow all of them, or some of them; whichever you choose, just remember to take it slow. Real slow.

1. No shots of cheap, nasty tasting alcohol. If you wanna do shots, make it one (maybe two, who we kiddin’?), not five or six or seventeen… and never use Rubinoff.

2. Do NOT mix. Start the night with one drink and keep at it until you’re through. Mixing creates a whirlwind of different types of drunk that normally left me hungover and puking the next morning.

3. If you drink liquor (over beer), drink slower. For many – like myself – liquor (i.e., vodka, rum, etc) does a number on you quicker than a few beers. So, if you decide to brave the evening with some Rum and Cokes, make sure you pace yourself so you don’t end up hugging the toilet. Read More »