So, needless to say, TV wasn’t a big part of my childhood. That was fine by me; I spent my time outside and learning how to play guitar.

When I moved out and into dorms at 18, I still didn’t watch TV much. I think there was one in my dorm, but I wouldn’t have noticed either way. It just wasn’t a part of my life. But when I moved in with new roomies in a real apartment when I was 19, everything changed. Not only did we have a TV, but we had every channel (not to mention On Demand and, mmmm, DVR). I learned to love TV.

In fact, I’m watching it right now.

Since I have spent a few years getting to know the ins and out of this tube and the entertainment that it so benevolently offers me, I have noticed that there are some very bad people on TV. And I love lists. So, naturally, I made a list of the worst people on TV.

1. Heidi Montag. You suck. Not only have you clearly devoted your life to looking like Barbie and dating a douchier version of Ken, but you are also retardedly incompetent and talentless. Congrats, Heidi. (Note: Tied for#1 is her douchier version of Ken, Spencer Pratt. Get a job and get out of my life.)

2. Blair Waldorf. You might just be a fiction character, Blair Waldorf (like Heidi isn’t?), but your character blows. You are a very mean girl who has nothing to do with her life. The sad thing is that girls, like my current roommate, think you’re actually someone to emulate. Puke.

3. Celia Hodes. I love the show Weeds, Celia, but you are definitely not why. Your trainwreck of a character is a walking double-standard, an ache in my viewer’s side. Basically, you’re a hot mess. You’re a bad mom, a bad wife, a bad friend, a bad worker. WTF are you good at? I hate you.

4. Carlos Mencia. You are not funny. You are not funny. You are not funny. Not only are you not funny, but you’re annoying. The 15 minutes I once spent trying to get your annoying voice out of my head might have been my worst 15 minutes of my life. Thank you.

5. Ali Lohan. We don’t need another Lohan in our faces. It’s simple. And on top of that, you’re not your sister (though you sure do try). Why don’t you finish high school and then go find a life of your own?

Anyone else who makes you want to claw your eyes out? Elizabeth Hasselback? Oprah Winfrey? Alex Trebek?

[Photo from: seat42f.com]

Long after graduation, you’ll find yourself using some of the knowledge (hopefully, your major) everyday. Other courses will disappear from your mind as quickly as they appear.

For example, I now only think of the two required semesters of Western Civilization when Alex Trebek asks a question related to the Ottoman Empire.

A few classes outside my major, though, have yielded a value far beyond the tuition dollars paid for them. I advise any college student to find time to take five courses. Perhaps one or two will be required and one or two can fill elective options. Even if that’s not the case, don’t graduate without these on your transcript and in your head!

Speech Communications

When you ask people what scares them most, the most common answer is public speaking. This class may not completely cure a fear of public speaking, but it can give you the confidence you need to make a presentation in front of crowds. More than that, the class teaches how a good speech is organized. You’ll learn how to use humor (and when to avoid it) and how to keep an audience interested. Speech classes generally give plenty of practice in writing, researching and delivering speeches…all followed by valuable feedback.

Psychology

This one is obvious. Even though the first class is very basic, you’ll learn a lot about yourself, others and relationships. This class will improve your parenting skills, your skills as a spouse and give you a broader understanding of mankind.

Biology

Just as psychology provides an understanding of how the human mind works, biology provides a look into how the human body and other forms of life work. My instructor was great and I was in the class with a bunch of nursing students, so we really got deep in the subject. I learned the basics of nutrition, how my body works and how to tell when/what is wrong. (And the dissecting part isn’t but a day or two!)

Speed Reading

I actually was able to take this as an elective, but my cousin is now taking it as a non-credit course. She had to pay an extra $100, but it’s worth it. Take it early in your academic career and you’ll reap benefits in hours of time saved. It doesn’t matter what your major is…most of your junior and senior years will be spent reading. Speed reading offers practical skills that increase your reading speed while actually improving comprehension. So, it can actually help on exams like the LSAT and the GRE.

Journalism

Okay, everyone has to take English composition. In this class, you’ll learn how to write essays, the basics of grammar and how to document research. That’s all great, but basically you’ll learn how to write for college. Journalism teaches you how to write for life. You’ll learn the principles of good writing for after college, when you’re expected to produce reports, analysis and correspondence that others will want to read.

“Five Classes You Shouldn’t Leave College Without” was written by Amanda Cartwright. Her other works for AC Content Producers can he seen HERE.

My favorite SNL parodies are those Celebrity Jeopardy spoofs. No matter how many times I watch them, they constantly make me laugh.

You know what else makes me laugh that’s even better than (admittedly) mediocre satirical sketches? Retro clips of Alex Trebek swearing his head off and acting like a pompous asshole.

Listen to that Canadian accent! Impressive.

This just goes to show that even celebrities who aren’t really celebrities have overblown egos. It must have something to do with staring into a camera all day, or in Trebek’s case, spending years and years of his life rattling off little known facts and hanging out with nerds.