What the hell is Snorg, you ask?

Plain and simple: it’s a T-shirt company. Who is the Snorg girl and why should we care? Her name is Alice and why she has created so much buzz around the Internet beats me.

Alice is a typical college girl who attends Auburn University in Alabama. She became a T-shirt model when her brother suggested her services to his friends at Snorg Tees. She is a cute girl with a nice smile, but I don’t see why internet creeps everywhere are refreshing their screens obsessively to look at her ad. There are millions of pretty girls all over the Internet, so why is Alice different?

Perhaps Alice is so attractive because she loves sports. It could also be her “girl-next-door” appeal. She doesn’t have a “perfect body” and she doesn’t pose promiscuously. This may all add up to the simple fact that realistically, guys dig girls that are more “real” rather than spitting images of Pamela Anderson. You can’t take her home to mama.

Either way, it looks like the Snorg girl may be here to stay. Similar to Allison Stokke’s temporary stardom, the worship of non-celebrities seems to be in style these days. Who knows? Snorg tees could be Alice’s ticket to big time stardom. Just keep refreshing your browser to find out.

The enigmatic anonymity that the web provides was a big green light for mean teenagers to harass other mean teenagers without the consequences of face-to-face confrontations. And it was this online shield that facilitated the worst culprit behind my pubescent angst: the fake screenname.

Fake screennames were the best way to tear your enemy (or popular best friend) apart incognito. You could lash out ruthlessly, ruin lives and then delete said screenname without being linked to any of the drama that would surely ensue.

I will never forget my most potent digital nemesis: ClawYourEyesOut. ClawYourEyesOut not only harassed me on a nightly basis with the unoriginal “slut,” “bitch” name-calling. He/she also IMed my adorable little boyfriend Brad and my bitchy, gullible friends and spread nasty rumors which quickly turned them against me.

And even though ClawYourEyesOut brutally defamed my reputation, there was nothing I could do about it. To this day, ClawYourEyesOut’s identity still eludes me.

But thanks to two female Yale Law School grads—who suffered a magnified version of my ClawYourEyesOut saga, online anonymity may not be such an impenetrable issue in the future.

The two women are trying to uncover the identity of 28 pseudonyms behind discussion board posts that spread rumors about their academic records, sexuality and even threatened rape.

The anonymous statements—which MSNBC dubbed “digital graffiti”—were posted on AutoAdmit, a law-school discussion site where employers can dig up the dirt on prospective employees. This being the case, the libelous remarks cost the two women legal internships and job opportunities.

Had these defamatory statements been published online by a known person, the women would have a strong case since the libel laws which hold newspapers accountable for defamation of character extend to the blogosphere. However, since you can’t sue a pseudonym (ie: Erica Segal vs. SexyKitten143), these women are trying to unearth the identities behind the posts.

They are suing the website’s manager—who denied their request to remove the defamatory posts—in hopes of subpoenaing information about the anonymous posters (ie: what computers the posts came from…so anyone who posted from Starbucks lucked out).

If the women win this case, victims of anonymous online defamation and harmful unwanted attention—like Allison Stokke—may be able to uncover the living, breathing humans behind the name-calling keyboards.

Who knows… if I can prove that ClawYourEyesOut caused me serious emotional distress, maybe I can subpoena his/her identity and finally get some closure (read: seek revenge).

Allison Stokke

As we’ve all probably seen by now, the second With Leather introduced Allison to the non-athletic world, the media has stuck to her like glue, painting her the picture of a young, adolescent sex symbol, barely out of high school. Her and her family have grown more and more uneasy with the unwanted attention, and her boyfriend’s douchebagginess has even come into question, thanks to all of her jealous male fans, who wish she’d do something with their poles instead. Ohhh, snap!

This summer is big for Allison, as she is preparing to compete in the Nike Nationals. There are rumors that Nike itself wants to sign her up for an actual marketing deal, although nothing at all has been confirmed.

Even if Nike did come to her, I don’t think she would accept, being that she hates the fact she’s more famous for being hot than an athlete at this point, and the company would more than likely try to bank on her looks and all of the media hubbub than anything else. She definitely does not seem to want any more attention – especially in print ads and on TV – for now at least, and I don’t blame her. (more pics after the jump)

Allison is also getting ready this summer to become an official college student at the University of California. HOLY HELL. That is going to be B-A-N-A-N-A-S for her and everyone who has a class with her, or shares a dorm with her, or sees her at a keg party. If there’s any way for her to get even more publicity, it’s through college. The drinking, the sex, the mixing and mingling with fellow classmates – so many people will undoubtedly try and befriend her, take advantage of her and snap pictures of her (which will show up on the Internet within minutes). Her college experience should be very interesting to say the least, and we’ll be sure to keep you nice and updated with every piece of juicy gossip.

As for the gross, pervy, fratty college guys at the University of California, they should be prepping their pick-up lines to use on her right about….now.

I see many, many more pole references in Allison Stokke’s future.

UPDATE 4.15.08 – Check out Allison’s new Cal Pole Vauting Pics

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We already know that she’s a gorgeous soon-to-be high school graduate with an amazing athletic talent. And we also know that she really wishes all of this attention – the Myspace pages, the newspaper articles, the blog comments – everything that is now surrounding her, would just go away.

What we didn’t know was that the men in Allison’s life are also being affected by her sudden stardom. And since it looks like her wish to go back to being just a normal teenager isn’t gonna come true (especially with bloggers like me on the loose) let’s discuss this matter.

Being that Allison Stokke’s father, Allan Stokke, just happens to be a pretty well-known criminal defense attorney, he’s having an especially hard time with this, because he obviously wants to track down and crush every single guy who says something sexual about his daughter. Even though he hasn’t brought anyone down in the face of justice, that isn’t stopping him from scouring the Internet blogs and message boards every day, in an attempt to filter out actual and potential stalkers.

He said, “I’m probably more sensitive to these things because of the cases I’ve seen over the years,” he said. “I’m concerned that something negative could develop from it.”

Allan will undoubtedly do everything in his power to make sure nothing from the blogging world enters into his family’s reality, and that these douchebags stay as far away from Allison as possible.

Speaking of douchebags, there seems to be one in particular who is actually allowed near Allison. Many pictures have surfaced of Allison and a guy who appears to be her lucky boyfriend. Well, lucky because he gets to date her, but unlucky since he is now the butt of many cyber-world jokes and, of course, these jealous blogger fans have decided that he is in fact a douchebag, and Allison must be rid of him immediately.

The Douchebag is certainly not a rare breed of male, as we have all come into contact with douchebags in some form or another. Whether he has unsuccessfully hit on you or your friend, or you’ve dated one, or you’ve watched one at a nightclub from afar because you dare not get too close to him and his “grinding” moves, a douchebag is typically a guy who makes it obvious right off the bat that he tries way too hard to be trendy, say the right things, hang out with the cool kids and yet, he normally ends up being “that guy” who you just make fun of to your friends anyway. Wearing sunglasses at night or globbing more product into his hair than a woman would ever dream of, a douchebag lacks an heir of natural confidence and comes off looking….goofy.

So, is Allison Stokke’s boyfriend a douchebag? Bastardly.com lets you decide for yourself, with six pages of Allison and her very lucky and unlucky mystery man.

For more pictures of hot chicks with douchebags, check out a very helpful website called (surprise, surprise) Hotchickswithdouchebags.com. Don’t let this happen to you.

Allison Stokke

If you need proof of just how much media, and, more specifically, Internet blogs, now have complete control over our culture in a way that seems to hypnotize us all, look no further than Allison Stokke.

Who the hell is Allison Stokke, you might ask?

Allison Stokke is an 18-year-old California high school student, winner of the 2004 California state pole vaulting competition and University of California scholarship earner. It also just so happens that Allison Stokke is what males would refer to as “totally smoking.”

It all started with the simple snap of this picture. Now, Allison Stokke is one of the most popular searches on the Internet and has been absolutely bombarded by Myspacers, sports bloggers, journalists and creepy men alike.

The only problem is, Allison and her family hate all of this newfound attention – especially the blog on With Leather that turned her into a sex symbol literally, overnight. Soon after, Stokke and an entire article written about her made the front page of the Washington Post – a place usually reserved for actual current events, like….um….yea, that little war that’s been going on.

Stokke speaks out about her unwanted fame in this clip.

While I feel bad for this girl, (it’s not like she’s Lohan, who keeps going out at night, asking for it) she never asked for this and seems genuine in simply wanting to be an athlete and nothing more) I don’t think she should keep putting herself in the public eye. (see more photos after the jump)

It’s only going to make men look at her more and say gross things, just like one of the guys who blogged:

1. I’d hit it.

5. What’s a pole vault?

I’m sure all the buzz surrounding her won’t die down anytime soon, being that our society eats up modest, pretty girls who photograph well and speak their minds. And this posting here on College Candy certainly won’t make Allison Stokke’s problems any better.

Sorry, Allison! I guess the only real solution here would be for you to stop pole vaulting and start eating a LOT of cake. Click here for more photos.

Allison Stokke