April 10, 2012
- 10:00 am
By CC Staff
September 11, 2008
- 3:30 pm
By Jess - NYU
So, three weeks later, I’m still recovering from the worst. surgery. of. my. LIFE. I can walk and sleep without wanting to die, but sitting for long periods is hell on a few fractured ribs and one which only half-exists, so I’m still spending most of my time lying on my side, watching TV or reading.
I have been reading some great books, but I’ve also been watching some horrible television. Seriously, people. There are shows dedicated to moving walls with holes in them and the jumpsuit-clad morons who try to jump through. There are shows that obviously employ monkeys to write their dialogue. There are shows that are politically based and hours long and amount to nothing! Even HBO and Showtime can’t save me, because besides a few great series, the movies they show during the day should never have been made in the first place.
But wait! There is some salvation – in the form of lesser known networks and their even lesser(er?) known shows. Shows that are fantastic but rarely seen by the normal person. Let me use my time on the couch to your benefit and educate you on the Top 5 Shows You Don’t Know Exist But Are Awesome.
Anthony Bourdain, No Reservations (Travel Channel): We’ve featured Bourdain a few times on our site, mostly because he’s an OGIF (Old Guy I’d Like To…). But here’s the thing, his show is actually awesome. Unlike a lot of TV cooks, Bourdain seems to fully understand what it is to apreciate all types of food, and is pretty fearless when it comes to A) traveling around the world and B) eating random things from random places.
Bourdain isn’t interested in comfortable hotels and beaches, he wants the raw and real experience of each place he visits. Because of this, No Reservations tends to be less about weird food and more about the people of this world; how different we are, and how weirdly the same. Bourdain’s narration is funny, deep, and often pretty badass…plus? He can’t stand Rachel Ray. Obviously, the guy knows what’s what in this world. Read More »
Tags: Alaskan crab, Anthony Bourdain, Deadliest Catch, dialogue, discovery channel, ghost hunters, ghosts, Gosselins, hbo, john and kate plus 8, National Geographic Channel, No Reservations, rachel ray, scifi, sextuplets, Showtime, taboo, TLC, Travel Channel, twins
September 10, 2008
- 3:50 pm
By mapofrussia
“What Rachel Ray does to food, Hitler did to Poland…she’s like a hypnotist; ‘everything’s okay, you’re eating just fine, throw some cheese on it and you’ll be fine’” — Anthony Bourdain.
[Initially, we thought today was Rachel Ray's birthday. Obviously, one of us was taking drugs or something, because her birthday was actually August 25. In any case, we still stand behind this article, because birthday or not, she's still probably tied SOMEHOW to Beelzebub]
In case you’re not familiar with her 30-minute brand of world domination, here are some reasons why Rachel Ray always has a first class ticket to fire and brimstone.
1) Her Voice: It sounds as though she smokes 3 packs a day, unfiltered. Except she rolls her own and crumbles glass and charcoal into that sh*t. We only know her for 30 minutes, why is her voice like that? Hopefully it’s from being really peppy and not screaming like a banshee at her sous-chefs all day.
2) Too perfect at making 30 Minute Meals: There is something fishy about her innate ability to time meals so that she always has time to take two or three bites. Something almost…satanic. A power so cosmic, every time she suggests her meal idea, I think ‘ok bitch, today’s the day you aren’t getting to eat what you make!’ but the stars somehow align and Ray gets two or three bites while laughing maniacally about how easy it was. Portobello burgers in 30 minutes my ass; devil burgers with a side of devil. Read More »
Tags: 30 minute meals, Anthony Bourdain, demon, diet, dunkin donuts, food network, Portobello burgers, rachel ray, rachel ray is the devil, Ritz, satanic, why so serious