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  • The Hills: The City Where Nothing Really Happens

    The Hills: The City Where Nothing Really Happens

    It took every fiber of my being not to fall asleep during last night’s episode of The Hills. And not because I only slept for four hours on Monday night after an outdoor beer pong tournament went a little longer than expected. That sh*t was just boring. Boooooring.

  • Bar Brawls Are Boring In The Hills

    Bar Brawls Are Boring In The Hills

    The main reason any of us watch The Hills is because the lives of all those pretty people in L.A. are more exciting and dramatic than our own. They go out to fabulous clubs, they eat at the best restaurants, they drive the nicest cars and they hang out with the prettiest people. And they get into bitch brawls at the bar.

  • The Hills: Not as Suspenseful When We Know Speidi Gets Married

    The Hills: Not as Suspenseful When We Know Speidi Gets Married

    Ok, now correct me if I’m wrong, but Brody did come out of his hotel room in Hawaii and tell all the boys that he cheated on Jayde, right? (And what the hell kind of stripper name is Jayde, really?!) Does Brody consider sitting up all night talking about his GF with another girl cheating or was he just trying to impress his friends by telling them that he cheated?

  • The Hills Finale: Shockers and Drama and Boobs. The Usual.

    The Hills Finale: Shockers and Drama and Boobs. The Usual.

    Before I begin my final recap of The Hills for this season, I would like to give everyone out there…

  • The Hills: Moving Out and Moving On

    The Hills: Moving Out and Moving On

    So, tonight’s episode kinda sucked. (Almost as bad as that picture to the left. Fo realz.) The be…

  • The Hills: Why You Bangin’ Justin Bobby?

    The Hills: Why You Bangin’ Justin Bobby?

    So, I was gone for a few weeks and missed out on a lot of Hills recapping. I was so excited to get back…

  • The Hills: TEQUILA!!

    The Hills: TEQUILA!!

    Well, tonight’s episode of The Hills definitely made up for last week’s lackluster performanc…

  • Candy Dish: Welcome to the Gun (Shoe) Show

    Candy Dish: Welcome to the Gun (Shoe) Show



    Madonna is dressed to kill…literally
    Bush hates pirates
    Getting sick in college for dum…

  • Candy Dish: Why Can’t the Real World Be Like Comic Books?

    Candy Dish: Why Can’t the Real World Be Like Comic Books?

    Steven Colbert and Spiderman = genius
    Audrina is a lying idiot
    Annnnd Whitney is getting her own …

  • The Hills: Drinks Are Never Harmless

    The Hills: Drinks Are Never Harmless

    Last night’s episode of The Hills was monumental. Huge. The early-20s-drama-rific equivalen…

  • The Hills: An Episode When Stuff Actually Happened!

    The Hills: An Episode When Stuff Actually Happened!

    For the first time all season, last night’s episode of The Hills was action packed! I was actuall…

  • The Hills: Spencer and Lo Duke it Out for The Douchebag Award

    The Hills: Spencer and Lo Duke it Out for The Douchebag Award

    After watching last night’s episode of The Hills I couldn’t sleep. I was restless. I was a…

  • My Breakup with Lauren Conrad

    My Breakup with Lauren Conrad

    Dear LC,
    Dear Lauren Conrad,
    Hey chica! First of all, I want to say I totally respect you as a perso…

  • The Hills: Where Sweet Jobs for Pretty People With No Skills Abound

    The Hills: Where Sweet Jobs for Pretty People With No Skills Abound

    Yesterday was one of the best Mondays I have had in a long time. I got some great personal news, it w…

  • The Hills: Take Your Bobo and Go Go

    The Hills: Take Your Bobo and Go Go

    Last night’s episode of The Hills made me realize three things:

    I hate Lauren. Ok, hate is a stron…

  • The Hills: The Land of Awkward

    The Hills: The Land of Awkward

    Last night was overwhelming; between the return of Gossip Girl and another episode of The Hills…

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