After years of slipping through the media cracks, Jessica Simpson is more famous now than ever. And why? The girl <gasp!> gained weight. I mean, think about it: what has J. Simps really been doing with herself, career-wise? Not a whole lot. Instead, the poor girl has been a victim of heartbreak, failed endeavors, and more media scrutiny than any person deserves.

It all started with paparazzi, a pair of high waisted jeans, and an unflattering camera angle. Suddenly Jessica Simpson went from mostly forgotten pop-turned reality star to tabloid cover material. Everyone was quick to criticize the star for “getting fat.” But what kind of society would condemn a size-six beauty, when the average size for an American woman is a fourteen?

You can’t swing a dead cat these days without hitting some guy who is bitching about how he doesn’t want to go see the new Sex and the City Movie. It’s becoming this huge effing backlash that is spreading like so much HPV and frankly, it’s getting annoying. And totally overdone. Saying that you hate Sex and the City is like making an “I Drink Your Milkshake” joke or calling someone the weakest link.

Even the Chicago Tribune has a story called “Because no man should feel the agony of this film”. The author, John Klas, mentions that women “Just Don’t Get It” and thinks that by liking an Affair to Remember, he is somehow absolved from implying that all women are weepy, oversexed and overshopped and all would force their significant other to see a movie that he so clearly and vehemently does not want to see.

As Klas says, “Millions of men are sick about this movie based on a TV show about four terrifying, rich, aging, elitist women who whine about sex and men and purchase $700 pairs of shoes to feel better about themselves.”

Where is all of this anger coming from, all this righteous indignation? If you don’t want to see the movie, then don’t go see the g*ddamn movie. I have a feeling that most women would rather go see a movie with girlfriends than drag along a guy that is just going to snicker and sneer and huff and haw for the entire thing. Read More »

Heads up, everyone: it’s cool to like Diablo Cody again.

Diablo has, of late, been suffering from Hipster Appreciation Syndrome, the phenomenon whereby pretentious idiots with great hair systematically value or devalue everything in proportion to its popularity.

For those unfamiliar with the process, it goes as follows:

1. Cool people like something.

2. So uncool people like the same thing.

3. So cool people hate that thing.

4. So uncool people hate the same thing.

5. So cool people like it again.

This is the reason why you will occasionally stumble into a crowd of hard-ass punks discussing, with great enthusiasm, the musical genius of Rod Stewart. Rod Stewart is like the hipster holy land. Ain’t no-one going to get behind that cover of “Downtown Train” unless they’ve been thoroughly indoctrinated.

Anyway, in Diablo Cody’s case, the process began with a whole lot of people liking her movie “Juno,” peaked with an Oscar for Best Original Screenplay, twisted into a slew of anti-Diablo blog posts and parodies, and peaked once more with a sketch on Saturday Night Live, in which Ellen Page (who is still sort of hip for now) must renounce Cody, in the form of a dragged-up Andy Samberg who only speaks in puns. Read More »