Regardless of your relationship status, there will be situations and the people that stir them up, who at any point in time, will have you questioning what’s really important in life. It just so happens, though, that probability of that sort of drama infiltrating your life spikes when you’re single. There are some people who take the dating game a little too seriously, who extract meanings from things everybody else thinks are harmless, and more often than not, those people are looking for someone to blame. Luckily, the Single Girl Society has you covered with a general rule of thumb on how to deal with people who don’t always have your best interest in heart, or for that matter, don’t even really have a heart.

Lesson #47: When it comes to people: If they’re toxic, cut them out, and if they’re people you wish you could be more like, hold them tight.

There really only are two kinds of people in our lives: life ruiners — those that make you wonder how you’ll get by; and life savers — those who you wouldn’t be able to get through the hardship without. Read More »

Lesson #43 – Sometimes A Friend Isn’t Worth Keeping

Maybe I’m just one of the lucky ones, but my high school years never once made me wonder when my life had become an episode of The Hills. The peak of drama during my high school years included deciding whether to play it safe and straighten my hair or to take a chance on my unpredictable waves on yearbook picture day. When college rolled around, the drama remained relatively low as I clung to a small inner-circle of good friends and the few boyfriends I had through the years. I can’t help but feel lucky with my less-than-turbulent recent years, but since it appears that single life and drama can sometimes go hand in hand, so here are my tips on how to deal.

We’ve all heard the classic rule that “no man is worth losing a friendship over,” and while I whole-heartedly agree when it comes to close friends, I can’t say that I agree in all instances. As girls, we all have that one friend who, for whatever reason, seems to only want to know about your dating life. Every time you grab lunch with her, the topic of conversation is always centered around what guys you’re currently dating or what guys you want to date, and every time you try to steer the conversation away from dating, she immediately brings it right back. It’s almost as if she doesn’t really care about you, because has no interest in anything you do, just the guys you date.

Though I’m sure many are bound to disagree, I consider this an exception to the “no man is worth it” rule. If the extent of your relationship with a girlfriend is based on discussing guys, then it’s not a surprise if you lose her friendship over a guy because it seems as though that’s the only realm you two have ever shared with one another. Clearly I wouldn’t advocate this for most friendships you have, but instead just for those few girls in your life who have never seemed to care much about your life outside of the time you spend discussing guys with her.

It’s also worth disclosing that if you do sever ties with a girlfriend over a guy, then you should realize that blame is an equal opportunity employer. For whatever reason, girl drama tends to place all of the blame on the girl and yet the guy, who is just as deserving (if not, more) goes unscathed. Just because you lose a friendship over a guy, doesn’t always mean you don’t lose the guy too. And if you end up making the judgment call that a guy is worth the mess he was partially to blame for, then out of respect for the girlfriend you lost and for yourself, let your guy know what he did isn’t going to fly again.

Lastly, and most importantly, remember that just because you sever ties with a girlfriend doesn’t mean you have to do it without class. You don’t need to make it your business to make this girl’s life a living hell simply because she wronged you and you really don’t need to destroy her life to rebuild your own. If you’re going to drop a friend, then drop her and don’t come back to it if you don’t have anything nice to say. Girl drama is cyclical if you deciding severing ties is the best decision for you then do your part to break the cycle by actually breaking it, and moving on with your life.

Got it? Feel empowered? Good. Now get the first 42 rules of the Single Girl Society

Tuffy Luv is your friendly neighborhood advice columnist. You can find her swinging from buildings…or at TuffyLuv@collegecandy.com. Either way.

Dear Tuffy Luv,

My college program keeps me and my friends in school full time in the summer. I was totally excited to be back at school after our winter internships and see all my friends. Everything was going totally swell. The weather was great and we had one midterm left to go so we started planning a beach trip/camping trip. I didn’t have the same lunch break as my friends so I left some of the detail planning up to them. Anyway, it was a couple a days before we were planning on going camping and I’m hanging out with my best friend. She is literally my only girl friend at college (male dominated programs are tricky that way) and a really important to me. I saw a list of camping supplies on her dresser and asked what was up with the planning and how much money I owed for supplies. And then her exact words are “You’re not going.” I got bumped from the trip because there wasn’t enough room in the car.

I wouldn’t have normally been that upset or mad but one of the people going was her friend that didn’t live in our dorm and never hung out with the group of us that did. She only hung out with my friend who kicked me off the trip. The guys going were a really great bunch but one of them was also the guy that my friend was hooking up with and then later she found out he was seeing some other girl in the winter when he moved away for his internship.

Is it just me or did I totally just get replaced? We haven’t been speaking but I told her I was really pissed off about getting ditched and that we hadn’t tried to get another car or something. She really doesn’t think it was a big deal at all and thinks I’m being dumb for being pissed. I really don’t think I have anything to apologize for but clearly she thinks so since she hasn’t made any effort to talk to me after I told her I was mad. I really don’t want to “cave” and apologize for getting mad but she’s not making any effort to talk to me!

What do I do???

-Ditched. Read More »

Girls are constantly judging other girls.

Girls are terrible to each other.

Girls are each other’s own worst enemies.

But…WHY?

Why is it that guys can be each other’s brothers but girls can’t seem to get it together enough to be each other’s sisters? Why are girls so goddamn catty? Where is the love? Where is the loyalty?

I want answers and I want them now. Yes, I’m being serious. I have questions and I want answers. So, give em to me. Explain the reasoning behind this girl on girl hatred.

1. Why do girls call another girl pretty or skinny with a tone of disgust? You know what I’m talking about. Imagine this sentence being exchanged from one girl to another girl, about a girl passing on the street: “Oh my god…..she is so….skinny…(or, if you prefer, skinnnnayyyyy).” Why the attitude problem? Read More »