Somewhere between midterms and fall parties and oversized flannel shirts paired with black leggings tucked into slouchy crochet style Uggs, it hits you. It’s Halloween crunch time. One morning you roll out of bed and realize your roommates have already perfected their Village People getup, your best friend and her boyfriend are pop culture referencing the shiz out of Taylor and Kanye, and your pseudo-fratty neighbors have their imitation silk Wal-Mart robes ready to make Hugh Hefner proud.

But with T-minus 36 hours to arguably the biggest party night (week?) of the year, you got nothing. Eff. You need to throw something awesome together fast.

Never fear.

Here’s a quick list of insta-costumes, all using stuff you probably have in your closet already or can snap up at Target on the cheapsies.

Super Hero: Mid-drift baring Wonder Woman costumes are so overdone. And also $60. Ouch. Save yourself the cash and the killer ab workout and opt for bright swimsuit bottoms over leggings, topped with a cami or another snug-fitting top. Decorate with your monogram in masking tape or Google image search a cause—maybe you’ll be super pizza bagel girl, or captain celebrity gossip. Complete the look with one of those thick workout headbands; fashion a cape from a sheet, or make a run to the fabric store for something snazzier. Wear boots and recruit sidekicks.

Beyonce: This one may take a little more effort (and guts) but if you got it, work it. You can pick up a black leotard at Wal-Mart, or any dance supply store. From there, all you need is a gaudy ring, tall heels, taller hair (great time to break out the Bump It) and YouTube dance moves. Convince the boyf, or another suitable male, to go as Jay-Z. Otherwise, live it up as a single lady. Hello, Sasha Fierce. Read More »

The world will miss this comic legend.

Nicole Richie has the cutest family ever.

We all have Halloween regrets.

Is Rev Run coming to Broadway?

Does Kristen Stewart deserve an Oscar?

Easily the best Halloween costume of the year.

Yup, that's what $18,000 worth of Elvis hair looks like.

I’ve sold a few items on eBay, and it’s truly wild what people will buy these days (although no one wanted my used retainer… strange). Recently, a clump of Elvis’s hair sold for $18,000 at an auction in Chicago. I don’t know how I feel about this. Someone just legitimately purchased old hair follicles and dandruff for the price of a small car. This got me thinking:

What other celebrity items would make a killing on the auction block?

You know what would make a good centerpiece at the dinner table? Michael Phelps’ bong. Stick a few flowers in it and call it a vase. I mean, that’s what he was using it for, wasn’t it? Better yet, MP should put some of those luscious speed suits up on Ebay. Who wouldn’t pay a pretty penny to get that up close and personal with his junk?

And what about the prosthetic vampire teeth Robert Pattinson wears in Twilight. I bet some young pre-teen would crack open her piggy bank for that item. Used, of course. Perhaps we should add them to our New Moon gift basket. Talk about a good addition to your Halloween costume. Famous fangs!

And Lord knows Amy Winehouse has a ton of stuff to sell (to pay for her daily dose of horse tranquilizers, of course):

Amy Winehouse’s hair extensions – $50
Crack pipe – $100
I just wonder what she could get for that last shred of dignity. It’s simply priceless. Read More »

Balloon boy’s parents are effed.

Take that 2008 wardrobe and make it 2009.

Octomom’s got her eyes on Jon Gosselin?!

Looking for something fun and healthy? Try these activities.

Project Runway fails on Lifetime.

Check out Lady Gaga’s latest.

Looks like Balloon-boy’s family wants to be famous.

Madonna’s making enemies.

Did Nicole Richie tie the knot??

Let’s talk about credit card debt.

Spotted: Posh Spice on Gossip Girl!

This must be the son of Superman.

I’ve got a lot of questions on my mind today: Is it humanly possible to read four books and write two papers in the next 72 hours? How did it go from zero to winter in five days flat? When will it stop raining? Who is balloon boy and why should I care about him?

And I’m not the only one asking questions. Take a look at some of the burning queries that have been occupying CC writers for the past week:

- Can intercultural dating ever work out for the best?

- Is paying $89 to get a bump-free bikini line worth it?

- Will frat houses be able to survive the Great Swine Flu Freakout of ’09?

- Is it weird to have a huge crush on Aladdin?

- Can anyone afford post-college apartments?

- What’s worse: sexist iPhone apps or slutty costumes for 7^th graders?

- Where can I get an adult-sized Barbie jeep of my very own?

- Would anybody seriously buy a vagina mint?

- Should you resist the urge to go Facebook official?

- What’s keeping us from actually liking the nice guys?

- And finally: Does anyone want to get some Italian food and go sailing with me?  Columbus Day be damned—that just seems like a sweet way to start off the weekend, despite the frigid temperature.

This is the strangest story I’ve heard all week.

Meghan McCain’s got a nice rack.

Usher’s ex wife is out to get him.

Bad romantic comedies teach bad dating habits.

What are Lady Gaga and Beyonce planning?

You go, Taylor Swift!