No, this list is a top ten-style countdown about the hard-hitting issues, like which mash-ups are the best ever or which apps rock my world.

This week, as we round out 2009, I’ve picked out our favorite media-buzz worthy events of the year. Keep in mind that this list will include a lot more cheating and Ed Hardy than Healthcare reform and economic crashes. (Sorry Madoff, I’m just not that into you).

10. Letterman Gets “Creepy” With His Staff
And somehow still comes out looking like the man for fessing up. Undesirable actions, admirable apology. Take note…

9. Tiger Woods
He’s changing his name to “Cheetah.”

8. Lady Gaga Takeover
As the year progressed, so did the world’s love for Gaga. Opening up the year with “Poker Face” and “Just Dance,” Gaga inspired many Halloween costumes, a rediscovered love for good pop music and rounded out the year with the inspired and wacky “Bad Romance.”

7. Chris Brown/Rihanna Debacle
From the horrific picture, to the Jet-skiing in Miami, to the interviews to the blue bowtie, Chris Brown is forever immortalized as an abusive, disgusting a-hole. Let’s not give this douche bag a comeback, please.

6. Swine Flu
I can’t believe I’m going to one day look back on Swine Flu as a serious “epidemic” that captivated the world and brought out those useless paper masks. Luckily, we were able to make them fashionable.

5. Jon Gosselin Gets Douchier, World Gets Dumber
Forget about Swine Flu, Gosselin was the biggest pig of the year. I am so looking forward to 2010 where hopefully the media doesn’t concern themselves with what type of menthol cigarettes this a-hole father went and bought at the local 7-11 in his spanking new bedazzled Ed Hardy shirt. Woof.

4. Obama’s Peace Prize
Seriously, why was this news? Slash, why did he get this award, again? Which brings us to another important, undeserved award…

“3. Yo, Taylor. I’m Really Happy For You, and Imma Let You Finish…”
But this had to have been the most unnecessary overplayed story OF ALL TIME. Also, cut my boy Kanye a break.

2. Balloon Boy
The most riveting moment of television this year involved watching an empty balloon fly around for two hours.

1. RIP: Everyone in Hollywood
Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, Brittany Murphy, Natasha Richardson. You name ‘em, they bit it this year. Heaven got a little more Beverly Hills glamour after this year.

Amy Winehouse needs to stop beating people up.

The most under-reported stories of 2009.

Does the “nice guy” even exist?

Well, these posters are a bit insensitive now…

Is it worth it to travel in your 20s?

Balloon boy’s parents are sentenced.

But with T-minus 36 hours to arguably the biggest party night (week?) of the year, you got nothing. Eff. You need to throw something awesome together fast.

Never fear.

Here’s a quick list of insta-costumes, all using stuff you probably have in your closet already or can snap up at Target on the cheapsies.

Super Hero: Mid-drift baring Wonder Woman costumes are so overdone. And also $60. Ouch. Save yourself the cash and the killer ab workout and opt for bright swimsuit bottoms over leggings, topped with a cami or another snug-fitting top. Decorate with your monogram in masking tape or Google image search a cause—maybe you’ll be super pizza bagel girl, or captain celebrity gossip. Complete the look with one of those thick workout headbands; fashion a cape from a sheet, or make a run to the fabric store for something snazzier. Wear boots and recruit sidekicks.

Beyonce: This one may take a little more effort (and guts) but if you got it, work it. You can pick up a black leotard at Wal-Mart, or any dance supply store. From there, all you need is a gaudy ring, tall heels, taller hair (great time to break out the Bump It) and YouTube dance moves. Convince the boyf, or another suitable male, to go as Jay-Z. Otherwise, live it up as a single lady. Hello, Sasha Fierce.

Toga: Nothing screams stereotypical college party like a toga. (Ok, maybe a keg stand, but that’s not really the point here, OK?)  There’s a reason those Animal House guys rocked out with their sheets out – toga’s are easily the simplest last minute costume known to co-ed kind. It’s a classic, and though you won’t get any creativity points, it’s still a very respectable choice. Spice up your linens with gold jewelry and this summer’s gladiator sandals. Hey, it’s the perfect excuse to pick up a sale pair during the off-season.

Barbie: Sure, she isn’t exactly a role model, but neither is the slutty flight attendant next to you. What Barbie lacks in realistic proportions, she makes up for in recognizable attributes, perfect for last minute costumes. Pull on something pink, break out that Beyonce bump it, and carry a hot pink hairbrush. If you can pull it off, speak in high-pitched catch phrases for most of the night and maybe that Ken doll lookalike will invite you back to the dream house. Consider renting a hot pink Ferrari.

Hey, You Look Familiar: Pick one of your friends with an especially unique, memorable style. Raid their closet. Develop their mannerisms. Make out with their boyfriend? Depends on your level of commitment. This costume works best if your friend has a high profile and a good sense of humor.

Balloon Boy: We were all waiting for one more piece of culture to pop and we got it just in time for Halloween. All you really need is a giant balloon wrapped in tinfoil and perhaps a Tupperware to barf into when you’re being interviewed on national television. Easy peasy.

All right dear readers, help some sisters out. What’s the best last minute costume you’ve ever pulled off? Any stories of impromptu get-ups gone wrong?

The world will miss this comic legend.

Nicole Richie has the cutest family ever.

We all have Halloween regrets.

Is Rev Run coming to Broadway?

Does Kristen Stewart deserve an Oscar?

Easily the best Halloween costume of the year.

Yup, that's what $18,000 worth of Elvis hair looks like.

I’ve sold a few items on eBay, and it’s truly wild what people will buy these days (although no one wanted my used retainer… strange). Recently, a clump of Elvis’s hair sold for $18,000 at an auction in Chicago. I don’t know how I feel about this. Someone just legitimately purchased old hair follicles and dandruff for the price of a small car. This got me thinking:

What other celebrity items would make a killing on the auction block?

You know what would make a good centerpiece at the dinner table? Michael Phelps’ bong. Stick a few flowers in it and call it a vase. I mean, that’s what he was using it for, wasn’t it? Better yet, MP should put some of those luscious speed suits up on Ebay. Who wouldn’t pay a pretty penny to get that up close and personal with his junk?

And what about the prosthetic vampire teeth Robert Pattinson wears in Twilight. I bet some young pre-teen would crack open her piggy bank for that item. Used, of course. Perhaps we should add them to our New Moon gift basket. Talk about a good addition to your Halloween costume. Famous fangs!

And Lord knows Amy Winehouse has a ton of stuff to sell (to pay for her daily dose of horse tranquilizers, of course):

Amy Winehouse’s hair extensions – $50
Crack pipe – $100
I just wonder what she could get for that last shred of dignity. It’s simply priceless.

If you really want to discuss an item of value, let me offer up some authentic Richard Simmons‘ booty shorts for sale. Naturally, any pair worn in an exercise video would demand a higher price than just his daily going-to-the-grocery-store pairs, as they have a higher (ball) sweat-saturation. And Richard Simmons sweat is like the nectar of the gods. Just imagine what kind of motivation would come with the authentic essence of Rich on your lower half.

And don’t think we forgot about you, Paris. How much do you think Paris Hilton‘s house arrest ankle bracelet would sell for on eBay? It would probably be categorized as a celebrity chic fashion accessory, perfect with a pair of Louboutin (knock-off) pumps.

God, knowing how much someone spent on Elvis’s hair, I can only imagine what Balloon-boy‘s family could get for that flying saucer. If my R.A. would let me tie it to the side of my dorm, I’d buy it in a heartbeat and be a part of history!

Balloon boy’s parents are effed.

Take that 2008 wardrobe and make it 2009.

Octomom’s got her eyes on Jon Gosselin?!

Looking for something fun and healthy? Try these activities.

Project Runway fails on Lifetime.

Check out Lady Gaga’s latest.

Looks like Balloon-boy’s family wants to be famous.

Madonna’s making enemies.

Did Nicole Richie tie the knot??

Let’s talk about credit card debt.

Spotted: Posh Spice on Gossip Girl!

This must be the son of Superman.

And I’m not the only one asking questions. Take a look at some of the burning queries that have been occupying CC writers for the past week:

- Can intercultural dating ever work out for the best?

- Is paying $89 to get a bump-free bikini line worth it?

- Will frat houses be able to survive the Great Swine Flu Freakout of ’09?

- Is it weird to have a huge crush on Aladdin?

- Can anyone afford post-college apartments?

- What’s worse: sexist iPhone apps or slutty costumes for 7^th graders?

- Where can I get an adult-sized Barbie jeep of my very own?

- Would anybody seriously buy a vagina mint?

- Should you resist the urge to go Facebook official?

- What’s keeping us from actually liking the nice guys?

- And finally: Does anyone want to get some Italian food and go sailing with me?  Columbus Day be damned—that just seems like a sweet way to start off the weekend, despite the frigid temperature.

This is the strangest story I’ve heard all week.

Meghan McCain‘s got a nice rack.

Usher’s ex wife is out to get him.

Bad romantic comedies teach bad dating habits.

What are Lady Gaga and Beyonce planning?

You go, Taylor Swift!