In my hometown, there is a special unofficial holiday that celebrates Thanksgiving the day before Thanksgiving. This night is usually referred to as “Black Wedesday” — a play on words of the insane shopping day that is “Black Friday.” Clever, I know. This is a huge night to go out to the bars. You can find every college student home for winter break and every other resident in town with no work the next day out celebrating, and what better way to get a head start on celebrating Turkey Day than going out to the bars and getting completely wasted? That is the mindset I had going into my first Black Wednesday experience last year, and oh boy, was I wrong or what?

In my experience, this night can go one of two ways: 1) a fun and memorable night out with friends and family or 2) a drunken blur that ends with your head in a toilet.

Having dealt with the latter of those two options on my last night out on Black Wednesday, I would not want any other girl to go through the drunken hot mess of a night I did. It’s important to go out and have a good time, but it more important to a) make it home alive and b) not be so hungover you can’t stomach that second helping of mashed potatoes and cranberry sauce. So I have complied a few tips to help any girl survive Black Wednesday. Read More »

Turns out, just because I’m 6 months out of college doesn’t mean I’ve stopped making stupid life-threatening decisions. Take this past Saturday, for example.

Despite reports that there was a massive blizzard outside, I sat inside and got ready to go out for the night. All the news reports recommended staying in. But, like usual, I thought I knew better than the news. I assumed that checking weather.com daily qualified me to be a meteorologist. At the very least, it qualified me to change my last name to Roker on my Facebook profile. So in the face of the oncoming “blizzard,” my friends and I got dressed, did our hair and headed out to a party.

It was freezing cold and snowflakes were blowing into parts of my body even my gynecologist hadn’t explored. So we hailed a cab and hopped inside. The car swerved, it swooped, and it stalled. At one point I’m pretty sure we were just gliding on ice. The cab driver even hung up with whoever was on the other end of that Bluetooth.  And at that moment I realized how serious things were.

I haven’t felt that unsafe since I stood up on Space Mountain. Read More »

St. Patty’s Day is just around the corner, people! What does that mean? Well, green teeth, for one. But it also means it’s time to break out all that green wear so you don’t get pinched by a bunch of drunk Irish people. But getting festive doesn’t mean you have to give up looking cute.

Au contraire! I’ve scouted the web to find some mighty cute St. Patty’s day options. So cute, in fact, that you can wear them all year round. Leave the Leprechan hat at home this year. Whether you are up for Kegs and Eggs at 4am, or playing (green) beer pong long into the night, this St. Pat’s day you are going to do it in style. Read More »

[Welcome to my Weekly Love List. A list, on all things I love. Because if I love them - well then obviously you may (and should) love them too. As the Backstreet Boys song says (and yes I am actually quoting them) “My Love is All I Have To Give.” So with that throwback, here are this week’s list-worthy things…]

1. Wall Decals- The best way to make your dorm room or apartment look more legit. It looks like it’s hand painted or wallpaper, but- surprise! – it’s a removable decal. So leave those drinking posters with the ripped corners to the boys. You can find them in fun shapes, pictures, sayings – you name it – there is a decal for it. Click here for another great option!

2. T-shirt quilt. So you have 5 bajillion t-shirts from the 5 bajillion bar crawls, Powder Puff football games, Halloweens, college sports teams, etc. Some have holes, some don’t fit (thank you, Freshman Fifteen), but mostly you just don’t have enough room in your tiny closet, or enough days in the year, to wear all of them. But you can’t seem to part with them given that each has a fabulous drunken story behind it. Solution? The T-shirt quilt. It’s a bit pricey but it’s a way to keep them forever without sacrificing room in your closet.

3. Almond Breeze ‘Milk’. It’s yummy, all natural and super low calorie. Not to mention it’s a great alternative to dairy and soy and since the studies on soy being good/bad for you is more fickle than Britney Spears’s sanity, this milk is definitely worth loving. Read More »

A growing sense of disdain for Dubya didn’t cut it. Being able to register at the DMV just didn’t do the trick either. P. Diddy couldn’t get us to do it, for Christ’s sake. So just what will it take to seriously win the youth vote? We are, after all, 20 million strong and dammit we deserve to be wooed!

I, for one, would like to see an increase in, shall we say, “game” from candidates both blue and red. McCain, obviously, has taken a step toward this lofty goal by recruiting the support of one of our high holy leaders. Sorry, Obama, that you have neglected to secure such a prestigious pledge of loyalty from the chosen generation (us, duh) but feel free to borrow any of these gems that I think would increase voter turnout for those of the youthful persuasion. You see gentlemen, the key to our hearts is to manipulate our basic dependence upon the following:

Natty Lite

Slap some platform positions on the back of those bad boys and cover up the saddening nutrition facts–we don’t need to see that anyways. I consider this a double-edged sword. Not only would the important issues be readily at hand (provided you go coozie-less), but additionally, voters can appreciate the conversational lubrication that is cheap beer. As inspiring as 4.2% alcohol can be to philosophical convos (if you drink, don’t EVEN pretend you’ve never been there post bar crawl!) that stuff takes a while to imbibe, making those discussions last just a wee bit longer. Now that a pseudo intellectual discush has gone down, both candidates have enjoyed spirited (literally) debate over their issues that should inspire sober consideration come November. Read More »

Ok, relax, just breathe. You’ll be back at school in…30 days.

This mantra grows increasingly ineffective the longer I am forced to live under the same roof as my mother. If you are lucky enough to have left behind your home home for your school home, then God bless you, throw a kegger in your living room (on a motha effing TUESDAY!) If you, like me, have yet to escape your personal circle of hell, I’ve compiled a small guide to maintaining your sanity as well as familial relations for the remainder of this short (but dear Allah, oh so long) stint back home. Because, let’s face it, being disowned would be counterproductive if your parents still pay the majority of your tuition/rent/medical bills and whatnot.

Scenario: You come home from a bar crawl, unhappy matriarch/patriarch up and awaiting your return, toe tapping a Morse code slew of disapproving comments.

Solution: Passive Aggression. Outwardly, bow your head and accept the berating and “Not under my roof” nonsense. Avoid eye contact, showcasing your humility and apologetic demeanor, all the while making easier your inner thought process: “Haha! You are merely projecting your jealousy onto me because you can’t go out till 3 am! At school, this is an early night! Mwahaha!” Read More »