How many times have you said to yourself, “Facebook is so taking over my life!” Between endless wall-posting, scrolling through thousands of pictures of you and your friends, checking up on people you haven’t talked to in years, and the joy of poking, Facebook never gets old.  And yeah, you know that there are probably a few pictures on the ol’ Facebook that aren’t all that flattering, if you catch my drift. But luckily Facebook exists entirely within the virtual reality of the Internet. Once you leave your computer or put down your BlackBerry, you are blissfully free to live your real life. All the silly, frivolous fun of Facebook is available at your disposal, and you can come and go as you please into that thrilling digital realm.

But what if you couldn’t step away from the Facebook culture? This clip from the BBC shows what your world  would be like if Facebook really did take over your life…and the universe.

In the first video, we have a Western tourist flopping around naked in the moat around the Imperial Palace in Tokyo (where the Emperor lives). He’s having a grand ol’ time while local police try to woo him out.

Monkey see, monkey do?

And it scares the crap out of us.

But now we realize that crazy cat ladies have nothing on a new breed of wackadoodle: fake baby lovers.

These crazies have been all over the news lately after a recent BBC documentary aired. Basically, these women buy real-looking baby dolls and treat them like they are real. They put them in car seats, buy them cribs and take them places like a real FREAKING CHILD.

Only they are not real. They are dolls.

And these women are nuts. Just watch that video. You will never look at Cabbage Patch Kids the same way again.

The good news to come from all this is that maybe we can all buy cats now without fear of that slippery slope into spinsterhood. The bad news is that I have to rid my apartment of any and all stuffed animals out of terror that I may become a crazy fake baby lady if I don’t get a boyfriend soon.

My first thought? Oh, no! Save the children. My second thought? Ummm, obvi?

When I was young, my role models were Barbie and Kelly Kapowski. Barbie had an impossible waist paired with magic tits, and Kelly Kapowski had cheated on Zack Morris with college boy Jeff, her boss at the Max. Parents today are concerned that the Bratz dolls negatively influence girls’ body images. I think they look like ghetto skanks with big heads, myself. But I suppose if they are inspiring young girls to seek a ghetto-skank look, there is cause for concern.

But I digress. BBC reports that girls are suffering from various social anxieties: two in five girls studied knew someone who had self-harmed; two in five knew someone who had panic attacks; and one in three knew someone with an eating disorder.

These problems suck; I know, I’ve dealt with all of them. I went through a brief bout of anorexia when I was thirteen, dropping to 104 pounds on a 5’7” frame. When I started eating again after an intervention, knives and razors became my friends. However, when I began working part-time jobs at sixteen, I realized that people look at you like you’re crazy when you have scars up and down your arms, and gave that up too. In college, I saw a school psychologist and got prescriptions for anti-depressants and tranquilizers (for anxiety attacks), which I fondly referred to as “Crazy Pills.” However, even the crazy pills had to go because I couldn’t remember to take them every day (the reason I still use condoms instead of the pill), and it was warping my mind.

I still have body image issues. I still sometimes have an urge to hurt myself. And, though I still have anxiety attacks, I’ve learned how to talk myself down without reaching for a bottle of pills. Yes, these are serious issues, and many people should seek professional help to deal with these problems (and there is absolutely nothing wrong with going to the pro’s, trust me), but I don’t necessarily think it’s a new phenomenon.

I might get a lot of negative responses for saying this, but am I the only one who has had to deal with problems as a teenager? Hell, even in grad school, I faced cattiness, backstabbing, and fake people, besides the obvious fact that grad school is basically a vehicle for a nervous breakdown. But I survived. So why is social pressure such a huge deal for kids today?

I will agree that it seems that tweens have a more difficult time dealing with popularity, body image, and self esteem, but why? BBC reports that the most important protection against anxiety is a supportive system of family and friends.

If a strong, supportive family is so important, then I predict that this problem is going to snowball, as more and more teenagers are getting pregnant and becoming young, inexperienced parents. And Miley Cyrus’ latest shower pics aren’t helping either.

Readers, were your high school (and college) years all cotton candy and sparkles? I welcome your comments.

Mad that hundreds of men and women are being held and tortured without legal recourse;

Mad that such actions only make the rest of the world angrier at America and therefore more likely to attack us in the future;

Mad that a handful of powerful men are destroying our chances to bring about resolution in the Middle East.

And mad that at one point I dreamed of being a part of it all. Seriously.

I was a junior in high school when 9/11 happened. I waved the flags, prayed for our troops, and supported the Patriot Act. I even went a step further—I decided that I wanted to join the CIA. Already fascinated by international affairs and politics, I was enchanted by the thought of accessing/gathering raw data, traveling, and serving my country.

It wasn’t until spring semester of my sophomore year that I changed my mind. I was meeting with a ret. Marine Captain to plan my course into the agency, via military intelligence. Near the end, I told him how excited I was at the prospect of developing my analytical skills in combination with physical ability. He paused.

“Um… actually you probably won’t be analyzing much, per say. Why don’t we focus on getting you physically prepared?”

That was all he had to say. It suddenly struck me. As an operative I would be a tool. Thinking isn’t a skill you want in a tool. (Imagine a hammer looking up at you saying “Um, are you sure you want to hit the nail again?”) I valued my capacity for individual thought too much to be reduced to someone else’s tool.

Three years later, I am so incredibly thankful I changed my direction when I did. It has since become clear to me that the CIA, military, and Bush administration were not who I, in my teenage naïveté, supposed them to be. Silly me. I thought that only the “bad guys” tortured their prisoners. They were the ones with secret prisons and sensory deprivation techniques. I was wrong.

Yesterday’s BBC headline says it all:“US Interrogation Policy Condemned”. The adjacent BBC side panel reads, “CIA ‘Secret War’”, listing key stories over the past few months: “CIA admits water-boarding” reads one. “Inquiry into destroyed CIA tapes” reads another. And, my personal favorite, “US ‘may’ use waterboarding again”.

Yet everyone tries to pretend that we are still the “good guys.” The US Senate Armed Services Committee’s 18-month investigation continuously illustrates this duality:

On the one hand someone admits that yes, water-boarding has been used and may be used again,

then on the other hand, the Bush administration says that all detainees have been treated humanely.

There is no such thing as humane abuse.

Luckily I decided to follow my own path. But I often think of those who choose to follow their patriotism and idealism– those who perhaps discovered too late that Americans do torture, that presidents lie, and that wars are not just. And that makes me mad.

[photo courtesy of www.ongoing-tales.com]

“Things are very confusing, looks like we are heading for a civil war and total destruction, its a ticking time bomb, any thing can happen any time”

That quote comes from Raj, in Harare, Zimbabwe on the BBC’s comment page.

Zimbabwe’s election (held March 29th) still has no clear winner. The opposition, led by Morgan Tsvangirai (MDC) accused incumbent Robert Mugabe of “preparing for poll war”.

The opposition petitioned Zimbabwe’s High Court to demand the immediate release of the poll results.

The Zimbabwean Electoral Commission (ZEC) countered by questioning the courts jurisdiction over the issue.

On Saturday, moreover, police prevented the opposition lawyers from entering the court to give their arguments. Luckily they made it into the court on Sunday.

On Monday the High Court ruled that it does have jurisdiction. The judge heard the case Tuesday.

Meanwhile, Mugabe’s Zanu-PF party said it wanted to re-check the election results because it feared discrepancies…. Right.

Tsvangirai retorted, “It’s ridiculous and absurd to talk of a recount before you know what the result is”.

I predict that we will see one of the following scenarios within the coming week(s):

If the ZEC reveals that Mugabe has lost outright, then:

1. He steps down and Tsvangirai assumes the presidency amid brief mild riots by Mugabe supporters

2. He refuses to step down and major rioting ensues…

If the ZEC reveals that neither candidate has garnered 50% of the vote, meaning that a runoff election must take place between Tsvangirai and Mugabe. (Tsvangirai is predicted strongly to win any such runoff), then:

1. Mugabe rigs the election and wins—major rioting ensues…

2. Tsvangirai refuses to participate (MSNBC reported that his party has already said that they fear a runoff will in fact be a “run-over of Zimbabwe. People are going to be killed”)—Mugabe wins by default and major rioting ensues…

3. Tsvangirai wins the runoff and assumes the presidency amid brief mild riots by Mugabe supporters

If the ZEC reveals that Mugabe has won, then:

Massive Rioting… who knows how long it’ll last…

Did you notice how many of these scenarios ended in massive rioting (i.e. death and destruction)? Four out of six… 2/3rds… not great odds.

The maddening part of this whole debacle is that it’s unrolling slowly before our very eyes. Men, women, and children alive today in Zimbabwe may very well be dead in a few weeks as casualties of this political crisis.

Stay informed with the New York Times’ coverage and Zimbabwe: Election challenge on the BBC.

Fun Zimbabwean fact of the day! The first president of Zimbabwe was Canaan Banana, meaning that a news report in 1980 would have stated, “Today, President Banana addressed the United Nations…”

Zimbabweans headed to the polls this past Saturday (March 29th) in a historic vote challenging President Robert Mugabe’s 28-year iron grip on the presidency.

The challenging party, the Movement for Democratic Change (MDC), announced soon after the polls closed that they were in the lead. According to the BBC, as of Monday night, (March 31) they claimed that their candidate Morgan Tsvangirai, had won with 60% of the vote.

While Mugabe has intimated that he will honor the people’s decision, the delay in announcing the decision has many fearing the worst.

Nana Ampofo, an analyst for Global Insight, told the BBC that; “It’s still not clear that the election results are fixed but there are definitely reasons to be concerned.”

Rumors abound of election rigging:

According to the UK’s Sunday Mirror, the Zimbabwean Government ordered nine million ballot papers despite the fact that only 5.9million people were in fact elgible to vote→ to some this smells of ballot box stuffing.

The Economist notes that in one location, African monitors found that 8,500 voters were registered with addresses that turned out to be vacant land → to many this signifies Mugabe’s use of so-called “ghost voters”

As of Tuesday (April 1), while there were still no official results, members of Mugabe’s party are increasingly hinting at a run-off election in the works. According to Zimbabwe’s election law, if no one wins wins 51% of the vote, a run-off must be held.

In many ways it may not matter if the vote was rigged or not. If Mugabe is declared the winner after such a long delay and amid such rumors there will be violence.

Riot police can already be seen around Harare, seen as the seat of the opposition to Mugabe.

Mugabe has long been a thorn in the international community’s side. Secretary of State Rice stated on Saturday that,

“His [Mugabe’s] regime is a disgrace to the people of Zimbabwe and to Africa as a whole.”

During his tenure, Zimbabwe’s economy has plunged deeper and deeper into crisis—the country now has the highest inflation in the world at 100,000 per cent and the lowest life expectancy worldwide at merely 37 years.

In my last post

Leaving Iraq is only the beginning of their problems. Thanks to this large number, it is increasingly difficult for an Iraqi to gain asylum.

How difficult you may ask? Read on:

→ According to the Independent, Iraqi asylum applicants within the European Union rose by 98% between 2006 and 2007. In 2006 there were 19,375 and in 2007 there were 38,286.

→ Within many countries traditionally known for their openness to refugees such as Sweden, the saturation of the system brought on partly by the deepening Iraqi refugee crisis, is resulting in a backlash.

In 2007, the Migration Board of Sweden approved 72% of all Iraqi asylum requests. Since then, however, they ruled that there is no longer an armed conflict in Iraq. The BBC reveals that during January and February of 2008, the majority of Iraqi requests for asylum were rejected.

→ According to Refugees International, neighboring countries within the Middle East are being similarly impacted. The growing influx caused Syria to end its’ open door policy in October, imposing visa restrictions on Iraqi refugees. There are 130,000 Iraqis living in Egypt and the country will not accept any more.

In Syria, the influx of refugees has driven up housing prices. In 2005 the Washington Post reported that while in 2004, a two-room apartment in Syria cost $110 a month, at the time of the article it had doubled. Who knows what it is now. One Iraqi they interviewed said that he could not find openings within the Public Schools for his children—another sign that the infrastructure has been overwhelmed.

→ The United States, who for better or worse began the destabilization, has been slow to accept Iraqi refugees. According to the Washington Post, between 2003 and January 2007, the US had allowed only 466 Iraqis to immigrate under refugee status.

In the face of such dwindling options, many Iraqis are left with no place to run.

To remain in Iraq means food and water shortages, no electricity, poor medical care, and constant violence. Humanitarian agencies can do little to soften these realities since, as you know, humanitarian aid workers are frequently kidnapped and their distribution points often targets for suicide bombers.

To leave Iraq, however, often is hardly any better. Rather than nearly certain death, they face the plight of an asylum-seeking refugee where a part of their humanity dies daily— refugee children are often unable to attend school, their parents are unable to find work, the family lives in a tiny shanty, and no one seems to care.

The plight of the Iraqi civilians is incredibly complicated. The presence of US troops alternatively exacerbates and ameliorates their security problems. A total troop pull out right now, therefore, would not solve their problem—it actually would make it worse.

There needs to be safe places created either within Iraq or within the neighboring countries where refugees can go and rebuild their lives. This takes money—the neighboring countries to Iraq have huge poverty issues already. It also takes commitment on the part of the International Community to the crisis in Iraq.

Why should you care?

Well, from the perspective of the “War on Terror”, teenagers and young men are more likely (sometimes women) to turn to guerilla tactics and terrorism after experiencing life as a refugee or in a destabilized state such as Iraq. They feel that they have nothing to live for and hate being powerless in the face of conflict—such feelings are the breeding ground for recruitment by militant groups.

Stability for the Iraqi youth, therefore, is essential for the future stabilization of Iraq and the prevention of further outbreaks of terrorist violence.

On a larger level, refugees are victims of violence. They are not the perpetrators or instigators, they simply are looking for some way to return to a semblance of normalcy. They deserve to be heard and helped.

For more information visit Global Policy Forum’s page on Iraq’s Humanitarian Crisis, Refugees International’s page on the Iraqi Displacement Crisis, and the New York Times’ archives on Iraqi Refugees.

I say most anything because this I will not try.

We all know that China partakes in some odd cuisine, but a restaurant that specializes in PENISES? And TESTICLES?

At China’s only specialty penis emporium, located in Bejiing, you can try the penis and testicles of a Russian dog, donkey penis (good for the skin), reindeer and snake. Apparently, snakes have two penises each. More for the eating, I suppose??

Nancy, the “nutritionist” as she calls herself, served BBC food writer Andrew Harding an array of penises and testicles. She also gave him a deer blood and vodka cocktail to wash it all down.

The restaurant serves a “penis hotpot,” similar to fondue but will prepare the food anyway the customer desires. Some like it raw. And that’s what they get.

Pickled, fried or raw. You can have perineum, testes, penis and aborted fetuses.

Yes, an aborted fetus. Apparently that too is good for the skin.

Besides the fact that this is obviously disgusting, are we as American’s shutting ourselves down to the traditions of the Native Americans (and now, the Chinese) that every part of an animal should be used or eaten.

We eat the good parts, flank steaks and chicken breasts, so I guess why not dicks and balls and blood too?

As a society, we do crazy things in the name of health and beauty. Even Tommy Hilfiger’s face cream boasts the use of baby foreskins.

It makes me think that eating the c*cks and balls of animals may not be too far from what we are already doing.

But ladies, beware, we are not to eat testicles. Just in case you wanted to give it a try.