While we may disagree on the name it is time to rejoice, beruit and beer pong players! CollegeCandy is bouncing and blowing through 20 of the craziest pong set-ups we’ve ever seen!

If you’re looking for a way to spice up that old slab of plywood you’ve got lying around or hoping to reinvent your three bedroom apartment as the party place of semester, then look no further, we’ve got all the inspiration you need.

Your tables will be busy, the babes plentiful and party packed!

initiating the gallery...

Apparently ridiculous college courses are the new trend on campuses all over the world.  I’d go so far as to call them “unnecessary,” but the 440 people who just enrolled in Potsdam University’s e-mail flirtation class would beat down my door (or fill my inbox…) in disagreement.  Yes, you read that right- one German university is actually offering a master’s course on how to flirt via modern technology.  It promises to give you the skills to “get someone else’s heart beating fast while yours stays calm.”

At first glance, I thought this was the most ridiculous thing I had ever heard; seriously, a class that teaches nerds to be better sexters?  But really, it’s probably going to be really helpful to some of these people.  Everyone deserves to know how to drop a well-placed “Did U know I used 2 be a gymnast?” or a “Miss ur face, come get in my bed.”

Of course, this got me to thinking; what are some other quirky classes that college students actually need?  (I mean, beyond all that Astronomy…tooootally going to use that one day!)

The Kitchen Beyond Ramen

I’m not talking three days a week learning how to create the perfect gazpacho; rather an overview of the basics.  This is what a tablespoon of sugar looks like, note it is significantly smaller than a cup.  Here is how you hard-boil an egg, and yes we keep the shell on for the boiling process.  Your final would be an open-ended challenge to create a balanced three-course dinner; the catch being that cereal could not be incorporated in any way.

Texting for Dummies (also see: Put the Phone Down 101)

I know you’ve been there.  Walking to class behind someone who just has to recount every excruciating detail of last night through a text message the length of a Great American Novel.  They walk slowly down the center of the brick walkway, tripping here and there.  Between glancing at your watch and trying to cut around the moron, you’re half waiting for her to go down like a Jenga tower and take out that pack of unsuspecting freshmen.  While it’s completely the norm to be “pro-text”, this class will show you how to be “anti-pain-in-the-ass” while your thumbs type away.  First lesson: just pull off sidewalk and find a bench.

Navigating the One Night Stand
(First year requirement)

You’re lying awake.  He’s right there next to you, eyes closed, drooling on your favorite pillow.  He has to leave.  Now.  Do you get out of bed and start making noise around the room, hoping he’ll get the hint?  Do you poke him?  Maybe you just put on your best bitch-face and tell him to get out.  Bottom line: there’s no easy way to navigate the morning after, especially when you’ve got a headache the size of a bottomless Long Island pitcher.  Perhaps if there were some ground rules, ones that were universally acknowledged and actually respected, the awkward moments would be few and far between.

Beer Pong (see also: Beirut Is Not Just a City)

Few things beat the feeling of landing that little ping-pong ball in a red solo cup five feet away, especially when you’re playing against some seriously hot guys.  Sad thing is, for most of us those moments are rare- like finding shooting stars and comets and J.Crew outlets.  Sure, you can throw a ball in a cup when it’s just you and your roommates playing on the back deck.  But mix in some nerves and a strapless dress, however, and…err…can someone hold my top up while I try to sink this shot?  Everyone needs a class to teach them how to tackle depth perception, high-pressure situations, and Natty Light buzzes.

Remember those days when you spent your evenings in grimy basements accentuating your cleavage
to throw off your beer pong opponent’s game? Oh, that was last night? Awesome. While it seemed like a total waste of time or just a more exciting way to get really, really drunk, it turns out all that dedication might pay off.

Presenting: The World Beer Pong Tour, a real tournament with a real prize.
As in $25,000!!!

Do you have any idea how many Keystones that can get you? (No, really, do you? I’m too drunk to figure it out…)

Yes, I know. I didn’t even think this “tour” existed either. But it does and two very lucky and very skilled Sacramento boys just took home the loot.

All those nights we’ve spent getting ready, going to some randos’ apartment and playing beer pong with our girlfriends is finally paying off. (And you can explain this to your parents next time they lecture you on how much you’re partying!) No longer just a college pastime, people at the World Beer Pong Tour take this “sport(?)” very seriously. So seriously, in fact, that they don’t even use beer. According to them, water (yeah, that stuff you chug in the morning when you’re feeling like hell) is better because it doesn’t throw off your game like beer does.

Obviously they’ve never seen my blackout-behind-the-back toss that made me a champion.

But that’s beside the point. It’s exciting to see everyone’s favorite backyard game getting the respect it deserves! While beer pong was once merely a way to to get tipsy and an excuse to get close to that hot Australian who sits behind you in Comm (“Hey, wanna be my partner?”), it’s now your chance to pay off those student loans.

Next stop: the summer Olympics?

Watch out, grams. That game could kill you!

Swine flu is ruining everything. I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, I can’t kiss without thinking I’m going to contract the disease of the pigs. And now, apparently, I can’t play beer pong.

Officials at Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute (yeah, I’ve never heard of that place either) have reported 21 cases of swine flu that they have cleverly traced back to a game of beer pong. One single game! But is anyone really surprised? What can’t you contract from a game of beer pong?

The first time I swore off beer pong was during an outbreak of mono at my school. I thought I was being proactive about warding off the disease. That is until I came back from Spring Break in Cancun and was immediately rushed to the hospital with an extreme case of mono paired with dehydration and probably a little bit of alcohol poisoning. So, much for that.

Next, it was oral herpes. If you play beer pong, you will get oral herpes, and DIE. Fantastic. I spent half the party staring at people’s mouths and strategically placing myself a team ahead of the dude with the suspicious lip sore. I was like the Nancy Drew of STDs. No one likes that girl.

Swine flu, mono and a multitude of STDs later, I’m beginning to wonder if my love of the game is worth it.  If you’re going to contract the kissing disease, it might as well be the result of a great makeout session, not a game of beer pong. Especially if you lose.

Am I right or am I right?

And I guess I could say the same for STDs, but I’d rather just avoid them altogether, thank you.

I think the world is trying to tell me something: Beer pong is the game of the devil. To be honest, I’m not even that good. Flip cup is more my thang. I think I will be respectfully declining any pong tournament invitations from here on out and stick to my favorite drinking game: pouring myself some vodka…and drinking it.

Need a reason to drink? Need some motivation? Too young to get into the bars?

These three games are sure-fire ways to get drunk and have fun without ever having to leave the house/dorm. Or simply as a little fun before the main event. Whatever. They are fun. Play them.

Beer Pong: This is the ultimate drinking game. If you don’t like beer, replace it with cider or Smirnoff or Bacardi (not straight up, please…you may die) or anything else tasty. Side note: In my recent travels abroad, I discovered that we Americans take this game very, very seriously. Do not attempt to cheat during a beer pong game. You will be seriously heckled and possibly thrown out. Unless everyone’s too drunk to notice (which is entirely possible).

Flip Cup: The first time I played this, I didn’t realize that the entire team had to flip their cups over. I thought the contest was over after the first pair. And everyone was just looking, and looking, and looking at me…

Kings: I couldn’t find a satisfactory link to rules, so here they are as I play it. (Which is the best way.):

First, place a large cup or beer mug in the center of the table. Then shuffle the cards and spread them in a circle around the cup. Each player will take turns picking a card from anywhere in the circle and following the corresponding rule.

Ace: God. The person who drew the card makes up a rule. The harder it is to follow, the better. For example, the prohibition of all pronouns (no “he”, “she”, “it”, “I”, or “you”).

Two: You. The person who drew the card picks someone else to drink. This is a one-time thing.

Three: Me. The person who drew the card drinks.

Four: Whores. Sorry ladies, I didn’t pick the wording. All of the women at the table take a drink.

Five: Waterfall. The person who drew the card starts drinking and determines the direction in

which the waterfall goes. He or she is also the person who may stop drinking first. Every consecutive person must continue drinking until the person in front of them has stopped.

Six: Dicks. Yes men, go ahead and wave them around. Take a drink.

Seven: Heaven. The last person to point to the sky has to knock one back.

Eight: Pick a mate. The person who drew the card picks someone who will drink at the same time as them for the rest of the game.

Nine: Bust a rhyme. The person who drew starts with a word and every person after must say a rhyming word, with no repetitions and no hesitations. If your brain freezes, you’re stuck drinking.

Ten: Categories. The person who drew picks a category and starts naming an item from that category. Everyone else continues in that category with no repetitions or hesitations, and you guessed it, the first person to crack drinks. Example: Fruit- kiwi, apple, watermelon, etc.

Jack: Thumbmaster. The person who drew becomes the Thumbmaster until the next Jack is drawn, at which point the new person is the Thumbmaster. This means that whenever he or she puts their thumb on the table, everyone else must put their thumb on the table and the last person to notice takes a swig of their drink. The object is to do it as surreptitiously as possible.

Queens: Questionmaster. This person becomes the Questionmaster until the next Queen is drawn. He or she will attempt to trick people into having to drink by asking them questions, to which the reply should only be another question, otherwise you’re tippin’ back your glass.

Kings: For the first three Kings drawn, the person who picked the card pours as much of their drink as they want into the central cup. The person who draws the last King must drink the entire contents of the cup. You do not want to get stuck drinking the cup in the middle. Especially if everyone at the table has different drinks. You end up with some kind of vodka-beer-Jager combo to swallow….and keep down.

More Drinkin’ Fun: If you’re feeling just a little bit racy, Never Have I Ever and My Penis, My Vagina can take you for a walk on the wild side. And, because I am verging on alcoholism, I like to drink on the weekdays during Family Guy. And then get seasick on the way home.

Here are links so that you can play and drink to your heart’s content:

Your guide to any drinking game you ever imagined, and some you haven’t.

For those nights when you also feel like getting drunk while watching TV.

These kids have since grown up, but have still not grown out of their party pooping ways. Here are a few classic examples of people to keep off the guest list at your next soiree.

- The Drunk Dialer: Everyone makes drunk dials. They are often regrettable, foolish mistakes that we wish we could take back; but for some people, one or two are not enough. Some people seriously spend an entire party going through their phone book; calling exes, third cousins and coworkers. Not only are they loud and obnoxious on the phone, but they also seem to think everyone shares their enthusiasm for calling their kindergarten best friend and will shout, “OMG guys! You should totally talk to Ed too!” Parties are not the time for forty drunk dials, save it for the walk home.

- The Rule Snubber: Sure, some rules are meant to be broken, but who likes to play games with people that selfishly snub all of them? Ever played quarters with someone that grabs everyone else’s coins when they are losing? How about someone who keeps drawing cards in Kings until they get one they like? Nobody likes someone that cheats in beruit or flip-cup. Cheaters are only funny for about a minute- Play the game right or don’t play at all!

- The Out of Control Fool: We are all entitled to our ridiculous night, but some people are always the ones that break things. There are certain guests that just do not know their limits and, therefore, are prone to knocking over tables topped with drinks (drinks that end up on your carpet and new white dress and shoes and, umm, are they going to pay for your dry cleaning?). Some people are just constant spillers and vomiters and never seem to learn their lesson. These party-goers don’t realize that seizure-like-arm-flinging dancing leads to broken lamps. I even know some people that have put more than a few holes in various walls. Not a fun mess to clean up/ plaster in the morning.

- The Guests with the Entourage: Entourages are great if you are having a blow-out, but for any smaller party entourages are an unwanted burden. Some people are just not satisfied with the already present crowd. They then get on the phone and tell everyone they have ever met where you live, how to get there, and yes, of course, there is free booze! Not cool. Their freshman year roommate’s brother’s friend probably doesn’t need to join the festivities.

- The Debbie Downer: Umm why don’t people just mope in their own homes? Parties are for fun, not for Debbie Downers to bring others down to their miz level. Sorry if they’re having a bad day/week/are constantly unpleasant, but this isn’t the time or the place. It’s fine to be upset, but they probably shouldn’t be out in the first place and definitely don’t need to try to make all the awesome partiers have a bad night.

Did I leave anyone out?

From Beirut’s most recent release, From the Flying Club Cup. Get it here.