You know those hermits you hear about that live in caves, hunt wild animals, and never cut their beards? Well, whenever I come home during a break from school, I give them a run for their money (minus the wild animal and beard parts – I like my meat cooked and my face fuzz-free). When I’m home, I hang out with my family and might make it to lunch with some friends a few times, but that’s pretty much the extent of my human interaction. As an only child, constantly being around (drunk) people at school can drive me absolutely crazy, so I love coming home and locking myself away for however long I can manage to.

With that said, last night I ventured out for my high school best friend’s birthday dinner. My mind, which had been reacquainted with constantly being with sober people, was blown. The champagne guzzling started at the dinner table and turned to shots as we headed out to a sweaty, packed club where there was so much grinding I was tempted to go home and get an STD test. Don’t get me wrong, it was fun…until everyone got super sloppy and my role turned from dancing queen to babysitter-to-the-sloptarts.

It got me mad.
And it got me thinking…. Read More »

Yesterday was my birthday and while it should be the greatest day every year (besides Halloween!), I have a few gripes.

1. The Facebook “Happy Birthday” – I’ve been using FB long enough to know that most people (myself included) rely on it to tell us of important upcoming birthdays. That’s fine. What’s not fine is the sheer amount of people who do not speak to me in person but have no problem wishing me a happy birthday on my wall. Here’s a tip: if were aren’t close enough for you to leave me a witty inside joke, then I don’t want your birthday wishes.

2. Getting Old – I’m old. Really old. I won’t tell you how old (you’ll have to be my FB friend for that….and then randomly wish me a happy birthday every year), but it’s not pretty over here. No more staying up all night to party and feeling great the next day. Now I have to weigh every night out and decide if it will be fun enough to be worth the 3-day hangover that will follow it up. Seriously. I never felt hangovers like this when I was in my prime (20-22). And I hear it’s only worse from here…

3. Big Birthday Parties – My birthday dinner was with 5 of my wonderful friends. I make a rule that I have to be able to talk to everyone at my birthday, otherwise why should they come? I have tons of friends who do the 30-person birthday dinner, or 60-person bar evite. Come on, people. Big birthdays are fine for big moments: 21st, 30th… I know you want to feel special on your birthday, but you don’t need to celebrate with that girl from your Psych study group. Or the T.A.. Or anyone else who only communicate with you through Facebook. Read More »