• Someone had sex with Piers Morgan. 9 months ago…judging by the fact he has a baby now.

•  A LOT of college freshmen dumped their high school sweethearts. #notshocking

• According to the Huffington Post, J.Lo celebrated Thanksgiving with Casper…Smart, Casper Smart. I know I wished it was the ghost too.

• Michael Lohan went to the hospital. Our prayers are with the doctors and anyone else who’s holiday was ruined by Michael Lohan.

• Wal-Mart shoppers rioted over a $2 waffle maker. Reporters are ecstatic over the news. I mean, they knew there would be stampedes, but nothing quite this exciting!

• The new Twilight movie is causing seizures. It’s also causing grown women to act like horny prepubescent girls. But no one is reporting that news today.

• Kirsten Dunst went make-up free at the airport. How very brave of her!!!

• There was some kind of balloon parade in NYC yesterday. I think it might have been a one-time thing. So you should look at photos now, because this parade might not happen ever again.

•Lady Gaga says she posed nude. We say that’s her most boring outfit yet!

• The crazy “inject-anything-into-my-butt-to-make-it-bigger” story keeps getting more ridiculous.

• A deleted scene from Harry Potter was released. Harry4eva!

• Aziz Ansari wants you to spit. It’s for a good cause, so just watch the video. For realsies.

I don’t know about you, but during the wee morning hours of the day after Thanksgiving, I’m still working on digesting my massive meal. While others are lining up at stores across the country to get their hands on the latest gear, I’m usually still fast asleep. Dreaming of beautiful things like sweet potatoes and being chased by turkeys.

If you’re reading this, you’re smart and safety conscious. It means you’re not standing in line at 5 am to get your hands on this years newest Wii console or whatever it is the youth are buying these days. To reward you for sensibility, here are some hilarious images of people in stampedes, endless lines, and fights. All probably happening right now at your local Target, Macy’s, or Best Buy.

You could argue that Black Friday is a suicide mission. Lining up with thousands of your closest friends, risking being trampled on at 4am, all for the possibility of buying a TV for a 99% off. With all this stress there is also the fact that there’s no guarantee you’ll ever get to enjoy those low prices!

So, if you’re crazy enough to leave your house on Black Friday and enter into a mall, or any form of store you need to game plan your assault on the box stores. Gear up with these five apps and make the most of your Black Friday suicide mission.

initiating the gallery...

Alright, here’s the deal: Target, Macy’s Inc., Gap Inc., Kohl’s Corp., Toys “R” Us Inc. and Best Buy Co. are all opening on Thanksgiving to boost sales. Target employees will have to start their shift at 11 pm, meaning in order to survive the Black Friday madness they have to sleep in the afternoon. They have to sleep to prepare for work instead of spending time with their families on a holiday that is about giving thanks for the things you love. Target employee Anthony Hardwick has started a petition, which has already gained over 37,000 signatures in protest of the change in holiday hours.

I say good for you, Mr. Hardwick! What is going on with the holiday craziness? I remember when the holidays were actually celebrated in the month that they fell. I used to go into stores in October and only see Halloween decorations, but in recent years it seems corporations are trying to fast forward everything all the time. I don’t want to see Christmas decorations in October! I don’t want to see cornucopias and turkeys until November 1. And I most certainly don’t want people to be forced to give up one of the most family oriented holidays for the sake of Christmas sales!

Black Friday used to be a novel idea when the stores opened at normal hours. People would stand outside in line waiting for the doors to open, and it was crazy. But now, stores have surpassed crazy. It’s called Black Friday not Black Thursday, and there is absolutely no need for stores to open on Thursday night. I don’t care how much you think sales will go up. These stores are ruining holidays for their employees. Sure you can say that it’s their job, but it’s not fair to them in any capacity. People should not have to leave their families to work on holidays. How about you stop robbing families of their time together and open stores at normal hours?

If stores stop opening so early, then shoppers wouldn’t have a choice but to wait. Call me crazy, but I’m pretty sure people would still go shopping and would be relieved that they themselves don’t have to cut time with the family to go stand in line and risk getting trampled. Think about it. When a store isn’t open, what do you do? You wait until it’s open. Or you go somewhere else, but if every store holds off until normal store hours, no one would lose business.

I want the holidays back. I watched a Christmas movie last night on ABC Family, and Thanksgiving hasn’t happened yet! Why?! Everyone needs to chill out, we only have so much time to live our lives so why are we rushing everything? We live in a fast-paced world, but we need to slow our roll. I’m afraid that next year Black Friday sales are going to start the day after Halloween, and Thanksgiving will become obsolete. This is getting ridiculous, and it needs to stop.

In order to maximize your Thanksgiving break, you took the last flight back to campus. You lugged your oh-my-god-why-is-this-so-heavy luggage – now overflowing with clean laundry, Black Friday goodies and Gladwear filled with leftovers – from the airport to your house/apartment/dorm room. When you arrive – way past your usual Sunday night bedtime – you’re greeted by your roommate. You haven’t seen each other in what seems like ages, so you squeal, drop your stuff by the door and hug it out.

“HIIIII! How was your break!?” She shrieks as you plop down on the futon. “I missed yooooou!”

Excitedly you tell her about your run-in with your high school boyfriend (awk), Thanksgiving dinner when you got a little too tipsy and spilled cranberry sauce on Anal Aunt Susie’s white carpet (awk) and the insane shopping spree you went on with your mom (awesome). Midway through the rundown of all the deals you scored at Nordstrom (including all the things your mom bought you for Christmas/Hanukkah but won’t actually give you until she wraps them), you jump up, realizing it would be so much better to show her everything.

As you unzip your suitcase, you smell the pumpkin bread wafting from its Ziploc baggie on the top of your suitcase so you bust it out. Before you know it, it’s after midnight and you and your roommate are chowing down on leftovers while doing a fashion show of all your newest threads.

“Oh my god,” she mumbles through a mouthful of brownie. “I am so borrowing those boots!”

Eventually, you’re in your fourth food coma of the weekend, it’s nearing the middle of the night and decide to pack up what’s left of the leftovers (read: the steamed green beans your mother made you talk) and go to sleep.

You put on some PJs, wash up, then climb into bed. “It feels good to be back,” you think to yourself as you stare up at the ceiling, relaxed and comfortably full. Then you start planning out your new outfits for classes this week.

Classes.
Sh*t.

You didn’t do any of your reading for tomorrow’s lecture. And, oh no, you totally forgot about that 3-page book review you have due on Wednesday. And don’t you have 3 back-t0-back student group meetings tomorrow night? And all those internship applications – those have to be in by Friday! And finals are only 2 weeks away and you’re at least a month behind on all that history reading. Oh god – when are you supposed to go to the gym and work off all that pumpkin bread? Or figure out your schedule for next semester?!

You toss and turn, unable to fall asleep. All of that holiday break relaxation? Gone faster than mom’s famous brownies.

—

Yeah, we’ve all been there. There’s nothing worse than the Monday after a long, glorious, holiday weekend. Nothing.

Want more typical tales of a college coed? Get ‘em right here, right now.

And it turns out, that whole “cuddling” thing might be better for all of us than a trip to the gym or a daily vitamin.

I’ve recently come across tons of articles telling us how important love is. MSN even cites a University of Pittsburgh study that showed women who were in a healthy marriage had lower risks for cardiovascular disease. Another study states that in a good relationship, participants were shown to have less anxiety, lower blood pressure and even a longer life. One of my favorite facts found on U.S. News says that when you’re in a happy relationship, you produce less of the stress hormone known as cortisol. Having less cortisol is better because this hormone works against the immune system, making you more prone to sickness and colds!

Yes, being in love prevents sickness.

But for all of us single ladies who may not have a love prospect to smooch under the mistletoe, don’t think we’re at any disadvantage. Although these studies focus on married couples, I think the overall message is this: as long as you are happy, you can be healthy.

Love comes in many forms and even if you don’t have yourself a honey bunny on a farm, you’ve got plenty of people in your life to love. Yes, your BFFs and your family can keep you healthy too. This season, I challenge you to focus on these more long term relationships. Forget about trying to find someone to kiss as the ball drops on New Year’s Eve and embrace the love you’ve already got in your life: the people who have been around you since day one (as opposed to the random guy who might not make it past 8am on January 1st). These are the people that can make us all healthy and happy.

As these studies have shown, love makes you feel awesome. Whether it’s with one person or with a big group of friends, love makes the world go round! And it keeps you healthier as it turns. But, who needs an article to tell you how great love feels? You don’t need a PhD to know that being in a great relationship makes you happy, bubbly and warm n’ fuzzy inside.

Instead of worrying about which hometown ex you’re going to snag for the holidays (because the stress will literally make you sick), focus on how much fun it’s going to not worry about any of that. Hit the mall with your  friends, snuggle up on the couch for some QT with the family, have a holiday cookie exchange with your high school besties – just spend time with the people you love.

You’ll feel better. Science says so!

Because I’m usually a sane and rational human being, I never dared go out on Black Friday. Until last year, when I saw a killer sale on something I really wanted.  It was a scary, adrenaline-rushing, almost death-inducing experience that I survived with success. So I’m here this year to give you the ins and outs to getting what you want (without being trampled by a crowd of screaming soccer moms) on Black Friday.

Trust me, it isn’t an experience you want to go into blindly.

1. Have a Plan of Attack in Advance

Planning ahead for Black Friday is essential. Running into a field of mayhem with nowhere to go isn’t usually the best offensive plan.  (Have you ever tried walking into Ikea just to look around? Yeah, you know what I’m talking about.) Give yourself a head start by checking out some sales that you should definitely be checking out.  As always, Macys is offering insane deals, Urban Outfitters is offering 50% off on everything in the store, and those aren’t the only clothing racks offering great sales.

2. Pack Some Heat Energy Shots

Let me tell you right now, you’re going to need more than your natural energy to get through the craziness that is Black Friday.  Go to your local gas station and pick up a Five Hour Energy. It’s powerful as powerful as a Venti coffee, but it goes down quick so you aren’t stuck toting it around as you fill your arms with goodies.

3. Wear the Right Duds

This is essential so that you can huddle in the corner and try on all your clothes over other clothes. May we suggest no-tie shoes (but keep ‘em sturdy for any running you may have to do), spandex, and a thin tank top.

4. Play Good Offense

Especially against those mommies who want to snatch everything in your path — and use their elbows while you’re at it.  Puff your chest out in confidence, walk with meaning, and always be on the look-out for the deal you want. Never take your eye off the prize.

5. Bring a List

Learn something from Santa Clause (besides the fact downing cookies and milk for 24 hours straight probably isn’t the solution to that beer gut).  Lists are one of my favorite things on this planet — and they are even better when you can take them to Black Friday. If you know what you need (and what you don’t), you and your wallet will leave happy. The biggest goal of the day is to save money on awesome deals, not buy things you don’t need. Like a $200 (used to be $1000) lawn mower for your dorm room.

6. Get a Fabulous Nights Sleep Before the Mayhem

Sleep. Sleep. Sleep.  There is nothing like the power of some shut eye before such an important and strenuous event.

Good luck out there, ladies.

Got any other good Black Friday tips? Share them below.

It’s that time of year again. The time of year when rational, mentally stable people go absolutely crazy just to get a good deal on a flat screen TV. Whether you hate the day or you camp out nights before, you’ve got to agree it’s a crazy holiday. Our friends at the Credit Score Blog have done a little research and dug up some fun facts about the upcoming stampede.

[There are over 100 million sites on the Internet. 100 million! You might think you know about all the important ones (CollegeCandy, Gmail, Google, Facebook…), but there are thousands of other sweet sites out there (like GoFobo, FashionStake, and Philo) and more showing up every day! We get it – it’s not easy or fun sifting through the crap and porn to find those gems, so we’re gonna bring the gems to you. Just sit back, kick up those feet and allow us to introduce you to the diamonds in the internet rough.]

The holidays are almost here again, and if you haven’t finished (or even started) your gift shopping yet, you’re in luck: it’s almost Black Friday.

If you don’t know what I’m talking about, Black Friday, the day after Thanksgiving, is the biggest shopping day of the year.  Malls are absolutely crazy on this day: expect huge crowds, long lines at checkout, and parking lot road rage… but if you’re willing to brave all that (and wear a helmet), you can get some amazing deals.

Black-Friday.net posts leaked ads and sale info for Black Friday ahead of time, giving you an edge over the other shoppers.  Come up with your plan of attack before hitting the stores by searching through the ads (which are organized by store and product category) and making a list of items you want to purchase–there’s even a feature on Black-Friday.net that lets you create one and either save it or print it out!  Then, when Friday morning rolls around, you’ll be able to enter each store and go straight for what you need, cutting down on the amount of time you’ll have to spend dealing with all the craziness…and the risk of losing that $9.99 42-inch plasma TV.

As great as Black Friday is, it’s not the only day to find great discounts on holiday gifts.  On Cyber Monday, the Monday after Thanksgiving weekend, there are tons of amazing deals on the internet–and Black-Friday.net has information on those as well!  Big online retailers like Amazon and Overstock have specials and major markdowns, and other stores will offer Cyber Monday sales on their websites in addition to their Black Friday deals.

So whether or not you’re willing to brave the malls on Black Friday or prefer to do all your holiday shopping from the comfort of your own home on Cyber Monday, Black-Friday.net has you covered so you can score all the best deals!

The Dos And Don’ts Of Thanksgiving Break: Brittany teaches us how not to make Thanksgiving weekend as regrettable as that one night freshman year when you decided Patron shots were a good idea. Comment on your favorite part of Thanksgiving and WIN A BIG PRIZE!

Your Thanksgiving Break Packing List: Don’t forget your fat pants (most people do.) And your bar outfit for Wednesday. Really, it’s soooo important for your high school social standing to pack right.

5 Things To Know About Being Home For Thanksgiving Break: College life is great, but there are some really amazing things about being at home again.  Here are some of the best.

Thanksgiving Dinner Will Wreak Havoc On Your Waistline: Kind of a buzzkill, but really valuable information.  No one wants to go back to school with an extra five covering up the Freshman 15.

Intro To Cooking: Cranberry Applesauce: A sophisticated take on your favorite baby food. You’ll wow your grandmother with this simple,easy recipe.

The Black Friday Go-To Outfit: Turn the mall into a runway with this fierce yet functional ensemble. Oh, we forgot to mention in the post you should probably bring protective eyewear.

College, I Thank Thee: It’s easy to forget during finals week, but college life is pretty fan-tastic – so let’s give thanks. Where else can  you walk of shame like it’s no big deal.

I’m Not Thankful For Thanksgiving: There are people who don’t love the holiday? Who knew?!

Life After College – Holiday Anxieties: There’s a reason suicide rates spike during the holidays. LOL. But seriously.

The Perfect (And Strechy) Outfits For Your Thanksgiving Dinner: No need to unbutton your jeans at the table this year.

Vegetarian Thanksgiving? Yes, Please: Tofurkey, anyone?

Green Up Your Turkey Day: So that next year you can be thankful for the ozone layer.

Thanksgiving Part Deux: Best ways to liven leftovers.  Ever.

The Weekly Ten: The Little Things I’m Thankful For: It’s the little, simple things in life that we need to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.  For me, it could be simple as a clear, quiet street for me to walk on Sunday morning back to my dorm in my Jessica Simpson pumps.

Packing Light: A Few Basics To Get You Through Thanksgiving Break: How to pack lightly this Thanksgiving Break, because who knows what size maternity pants you’re going to need to pack on your way back to college…

Morning After: Mommy Has a Thanksgiving Message: Ok, we get it – the day before giving thanks is the biggest party day of the year.  Thanks be to ‘not seeing my Mom on the walk of shame that morning.’

Intro to Cooking: Thanksgiving at College!: If you’re too far from home this Thanksgiving and you’re sticking to off-campus-housing living, don’t fret!  There is hope in a world where you can create your own Thanksgiving Feast. Bon Appetite!”

Ten Things to NOT Bring Up at Thanksgiving Dinner: Ok, your life aint’ a Glee episode.  It’s not going to cut to the next scene after you say something like this.

Thanksgiving Dinner Will Wreak Havoc on Your Waistline: Ok, Panera Bread does it, it’s time to count the calories on the Thanksgiving Menu this year.