Lesson #42- You are more than the guys you like. And think about. And obsess over.

College is a pretty consuming thing. Schoolwork including homework, group projects with people you wished you’d never met and studying for exams that promise to take up most of your time that week. Throw in a social scene — whether it’s your sorority’s slew of mixers and events or just hitting up the local bar scene for Thirsty Thursday with your best friends — and finding a balance becomes an art form. Oh, and don’t forget studying for exams that could determine the rest of your life like the LSAT or GRE, avoiding your mother’s incessant phone calls and the intensive yoga class that’s got you wondering if you’ll ever stop feeling sore.

So if a guy doesn’t take up the majority of your life, then why does he take up the majority of things running through your mind? Read More »

I’d like to consider myself a fairly sane person. I wear clothing, avoid drama, and know nothing about voo doo. I don’t have a secret alias, or an imaginary friend, or a meth problem. No skeletons in my closet, just a bulging IKEA shoe rack and a gallon-sized refill of Febreze.

Decidedly not crazy.

Yet for some reason, whenever a particularly witty, charming, attractive male glides into the picture, my so-called sanity gets a little shaky. Suddenly, I find myself Googling his name at 2AM, skimming news briefs about what appears to be a highlight-filled yet short-lived high school soccer career. I’m not crazy, I rationalize; I simply want to be informed.

We’ve all been there. Or at least I hope we’ve all been there, because I really don’t want to be the only one who creeps like this. Guys I like just make me a little bit of a nutter. Fingers crossed these apply to you too. Read More »

After a stint of boy craziness that’s lasted maybe ten years, I’ve had one bad break-up too many and recently entered a period of no-men-under-any-circumstances- and-I-mean-it, lasting indefinitely.

Don’t get me wrong– I like being single. I’m pretty independent. I can still study and interact with other humans. I function. But when it comes to the menfolk, I get easily distracted. And attempting to stay celibate in college is like asking Whitney Houston to get clean in a crack house. So, thinking that the best offense is a good defense, I’m using a plethora of methods to stay on track and focused.

These are the ones that didn’t work.

Fattening Food I started eating pizza every day. Like, a lot of pizza. There’s this place down the street from my house that serves whole pies for five dollars. (I get the “Oahu,” which is just fancy-pants for Hawaiian. Eating an entire pie in less than three minutes almost helps you forget you’re totally pathetic.) And the first few days I was feeling all blob-like and disgusting, but that’s actually passed. Because after a few weeks I’ve plumped up a bit, and now my skin glows (read: has a greasy sheen) from the extra calories. It kind of makes me want to have a baby. Which is bad. Bad, bad, bad. Read More »