For most of us, bikini waxing is a summertime requirement, along the lines of flip flops and SPF 15. You can’t go to the beach with a fur skirt, right? But did you know that how you landscape says a lot about who you are? It’s true – guys can read your vajay like a book. I asked a couple of dudes what they think when they come face to…er….vajeen.

What kind of story is your bikini line telling?

Goin’ Natural:
If a guy can get some booty, he usually doesn’t care what’s happening south of the border, but that doesn’t mean he’s not paying attention. A woman who lets her forest grow wild is either totally inexperienced in the bedroom or super hippie-dippie-trippie and lets that stuff grow everywhere. “I’m afraid to see what her armpits look like,” says dude #1.

The Traditional Clean Up:
So, you take care of anything that might poke out of the bikini bottoms and do some basic trimming everywhere else. What does this say? “She’s considerate, but probably not going to let me flip her around in bed.”

Landing Strip:
Leaving a little patch is a big turn on for guys. Duh. Dude numero 3 tells me: “She takes care of herself and knows what a guy wants. I’d be willing to ask for some more adventurous sexcapades from her.” Dude #1 chimes in, “The landing strip is the holy grail. When I discover it, I almost can’t control myself. Instant turn on.” (As if he really needed one at that point…)

Baring it All:
If you’re daring enough to go totally bare (and I commend you – OUCH!), guys don’t really know what to think. “I feel like a pedophile when there’s nothing down there,” said one guy. Another can’t stop wondering if it was a “shaving incident gone awry.” But there are some that like it. Guy #2 explained: “I’m much more willing to take myself downtown if there is no worry of coughing up a hairball later. And a girl who gets rid of it all is most definitely a freak in the sheets.”

Fun With Shapes:
Yes, there are women out there who treat their vajays like a work of art. Butterflies, hearts and arrows (?!) are some of the more common shapes women will shave into their nether regions. But what do guys think? “Do not enter. That woman gets around.” Guy #3 agreed: “Like a hot dog in a diseased hallway.”

Do you think guys are “reading” us right?

[This story was originally posted by one of the fantabulous CC Editors. That's hard hitting journalism, people.]

Likey? Don’t worry, there are plenty more faves where this came from.

Well, that one I requested.

Anyways, while we get all this stuff dropped off daily, it is truly rare that I find something new and awesome and totally worth writing about. Because I’m not gonna write about just anything the mailman drops on my desk while I’m out for my mid-morning brownie run. But I recently received a package that intrigued me and has since changed my life. And I not exaggerating.

I have a bikini line problem. It doesn’t matter if I maintain it myself or leave it to the waxing professionals, I get terrible in-grown hairs. I’ve used old razors, new razors, hard wax, soft wax, blue wax…you name it, I’ve tried it. And I’ve ended up with big, ugly bumps. Not really the look you’re going for when you spend $50 to beautify your nether regions.

I’m desperate to fix this and will give just about anything a try (well, anything that doesn’t cost $1,200 and use red, hot lasers on my va jay). So when I recieved a package from Hair Care Down There, I stuck that sucker in my messenger bag and took it home. Yeah, so it was only 2pm.  I just had to try it.

The Ultimate Shaving Kit came with everything I’d need to take matters into my own hands:
- A new, super sharp razor with refills
- Safety scissors for trimming without fear of lobbing off some important parts
- A mirror for getting at all those hidden places
- Clear shaving gel that protects your skin while you shave, but also lets you see through to what you’re doing
- A soothing spray and a smoothing cream to make everything feel better after the fact

And maybe a few things I didn’t need quite as much:
- A heart-shaped stencil for a more romantic look
- Bikini bindis, in case I felt the need to bling out my bush

Anyways, I set up shop in my bathroom and went to town. I had to see for myself if this shaving gel was as good as the promotional materials boasted. And it was. As was the awesome razor it came with. But the best part of the entire kit was the Skin Fix spray you use after shaving. It soothes and almost numbs the area so you don’t itch or burn. And it prevents ingrown hairs! Seriously, it’s been 2 weeks and for the first time in my life I don’t have any!

Now, I didn’t use the stencil or the bling included in the kit, but I was intrigued. There is an entire book explaining how to do everything and do it right, so there may be a little heart (or perfect landing strip) in my bikini line future.

The kit isn’t cheap – it’s a hefty $65 – but it’s totally worth it when you think about how much you spend (and how much pain you endure) getting those monthly bikini waxes. And you don’t even need to buy the whole thing. If you don’t need the extras like the razor or the bindis, you can just buy the shaving gel, cream and spray by themselves.

The Hair Care Down There products are truly amazing. After years of painful ingrown hairs (and one guy who freaked out thinking I had herpes….) I am forever indebted to the women who solved my biggest and most embarrassing issue.

What kind of story is your bikini line telling?

Goin’ Natural:
If a guy can get some booty, he usually doesn’t care what’s happening south of the border, but that doesn’t mean he’s not paying attention. A woman who lets her forest grow wild is either totally inexperienced in the bedroom or super hippie-dippie-trippie and lets that stuff grow everywhere. “I’m afraid to see what her armpits look like,” says dude #1.

The Traditional Clean Up:
So, you take care of anything that might poke out of the bikini bottoms and do some basic trimming everywhere else. What does this say? “She’s considerate, but probably not going to let me flip her around in bed.”

Landing Strip:
Leaving a little patch is a big turn on for guys. Duh. Dude numero 3 tells me: “She takes care of herself and knows what a guy wants. I’d be willing to ask for some more adventurous sexcapades from her.” Dude #1 chimes in, “The landing strip is the holy grail. When I discover it, I almost can’t control myself. Instant turn on.” (As if he really needed one at that point…)

Baring it All:
If you’re daring enough to go totally bare (and I commend you – OUCH!), guys don’t really know what to think. “I feel like a pedophile when there’s nothing down there,” said one guy. Another can’t stop wondering if it was a “shaving incident gone awry.” But there are some that like it. Guy #2 explained: “I’m much more willing to take myself downtown if there is no worry of coughing up a hairball later. And a girl who gets rid of it all is most definitely a freak in the sheets.”

Fun With Shapes:
Yes, there are women out there who treat their vajays like a work of art. Butterflies, hearts and arrows (?!) are some of the more common shapes women will shave into their nether regions. But what do guys think? “Do not enter. That woman gets around.” Guy #3 agreed: “Like a hot dog in a diseased hallway.”

Do you think guys are “reading” us right?

I am a firm believer that there is nothing worse on this earth than the pain of having a large patch of hair torn out of my bikini line. I’ve had many bikini waxes over the course of my lifetime (I’m a Jew – we’re hairy people!) and as much as I try, I cannot get through one without letting out a blood curdling scream. Poor Russian wax lady always feels so guilty.

Still, I keep going back for more.

Or less. Hair, that is.

The Brazilian, thanks to Samantha on Sex and the City, has become my wax of choice.  As most women would agree (and those of you who don’t really need to reconsider), having a little forest poke out of my bathing suit/undies/mini skirt is not my idea of hot. A tiny landing strip – regardless how painful – is.

Perhaps I should reconsider. According to an article on the Huffington Post, “Genital waxing can be dangerous in that the hot wax can irritate or

tear delicate skin in the bikini area, resulting in infections.” In fact, two New Jersey women have recently sued in response to serious injuries downtown caused by a brazilian. I won’t go into details because I just ate lunch, but let’s just say it was gross.

And now Brazilians may be banned in New Jersey.

I understand that this is a pubic public safety concern, but people are angry! Salon owners, who would lose a lot of business with this ban, are outraged. I imagine the men who have to interact with a woman’s southern hemisphere are pretty pissed, too. And Diddy! What is he supposed to do?

I don’t know about you, but if I want my skin ripped off monthly in the name of hairless beauty, that’s my choice. New Jersey can’t tell me what I do with my nether-regions!

Let’s hope this doesn’t catch on; I don’t think I’m ready to do this one on my own.

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What Britney Spears really sounds like. (Ears. Bleeding. Help.) But that won’t stop Justin from trying to save her career.

Tee hee.

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Michael Phelps may or may not be single.

Ever wonder what it’s like to be a bikini waxer?

Does this mean I can sue that guy who gave me a UTI?

You could name this iPOD playlist, Va-jay-jams