Dear Hulk Familia,

Please, please go away.

I’m not asking much. I’m just really tired, Hogans. I’m really, really tired of seeing your creepy mugs (and arms and abs…Linda, cover it up!) all over the place, doing and saying more ridic things by the minute.

So, like, two years ago, you were happily filming VH1′s Hogan Knows Best. You seemed like a normal enough family. Hell, that was the whole premise.

And then, It Began.

First there was the separation. Linda and Hulk, I thought you guys were forever! Well, frankly, I was sorry to hear it. I felt bad for you that things had gone awry.

Then Nick got in an accident. At the tender age of 17, he had his first precious DUI.  Not only that, but he managed to take out his best friend, putting him into a lifetime coma. It is a very sad story. However, Nick didn’t seem to feel bad for his friend at all. In fact, he has been too busy whining about jail and how awful it is. Yes, jail is horrible. That’s the idea. Don’t drive drunk and ruin your friend’s life. Read More »

Ali Lohan is no fan of mean girls

Justin Timberlake is bringing marriage back

9021-Oh, wait, are they racist?

Most. Diseased. Couple. Ever.

Robert Downey Jr.’s upcoming role ain’t no Iron Man

Apparently, girls don’t like Sci-Fi

Don’t burn your ex’s mixtapes!

The Tongue Painter makes me feel really conflicted

SNL gives a shout-out to college kids

What is Brooke Hogan famous for again?

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• Halloween for hipsters. Pop Culture is the new Snow White when it comes to costumes.

• Believe the hype… machine. The greatest music blog site ever is back and better than ever.

• Rock of Love’s Heather has moved out of Brett’s house… and moving in with the Hogan’s?

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Who didn’t love Heather from Rock of Love?

The stripper turned business woman took some time out of her insane schedule to talk to us at College Candy and had some interesting things to say about life, her plans for the future, and finding a house.

The insanity surrounding the show can break some (Has Rodeo really lost her mind? Heather won’t say…) but this girl seems to have her head on straight on how to fully utilize her reality fame. Here’s what the classiest broad on TV had to say:

College Candy: So what are you doing today?

Heather: Well right now I’m about to take a shower, then I have a big meeting with VH1. I’m meeting up with Brooke Hogan afterwards and she and I are going house shopping in LA together.

CC: Brooke Hogan?? How did you two hookup?

H: Brooke and I met at the Reality Show awards and totally hit it off. She’s a great girl and someone I really enjoy spending time with. She’s looking for a place too.

CC: That’s a whole lot of blonde; any chance it’ll be filmed?

H: I can’t discuss what I’m doing in terms of TV. It’s all very hush hush, but the meeting today with VH1 is to talk about what I’m doing next with them. People all over the internet want to know what’s going on with me so I’m trying to get something going so people can see.

CC: Are you really moving in with Chris Crocker?

H: No, I just threw that out there because I thought it would be funny idea. I was never really that serious about it but the press just ate it up and ran with it. Read More »

Okay, for a while, Tyra Banks‘ schtick was cute. On Top Model, she was bold and she was out there, walking the runway of Fierce Supermodel World. She definitely taught those young, naive models-in-the-making how to work it out and she always knew how to bring out the drama and make me tune in, week after week, marathon after marathon. I was a Tyra fan at one point, because she had just enough of that different personality to catch my attention.

Then, she got her own talk show and decided it was time to push her “I’ll say and do anything for ratings” image. Now, she’s a complete nut bag, she’s all over the television no matter what time of day it is, no matter what channel you turn to, and it’s like – okay. You’re crazy, Tyra. You’re out of your mind. We get it. Now shut up.

They say three strikes and you’re out. Well, here are just three of Tyra’s many recent strikes that have sent her from fierce to f*cking crazy:

1. This clip of Tyra going bat-shit crazy for Vaseline. Hey, I like petroleum jelly just as much as the next girl – it’s great for make-up remover and whatever else your dirty minds can cook up. But do I love it as much as she does? Should anyone love it as much as she does? Ummm, no. Read More »

• Put an end to this tragedy. Donate to the Dress Brooke Hogan Fund today.

• Celeb poker hangout jacked… then busted.

• All the talk from the Bonnaroo Music Festival is Trash.

• Silver Surfer snags #1, but Knocked Up’s not going anywhere.

• The Hollywood Hotties are all about the headbands.

Okay, so I’ve been seeing pictures of Brooke Hogan in her denim, assless chaps for a whole day now, and I just had to say something.

Here it is:

This is the dumbest-looking thing I think I have ever seen in my entire 23 years on this planet. And I’ve seen some dumb things in my day.

Not only is Brooke a horrible singer, and annoying on that show of hers, but her image isn’t helping. Clearly.

Who the hell picked out these denim, assless chaps for Brooke to wear during a live concert, that took place in bright, broad daylight, no less? Her insane stylist? The all-knowing Hulkster? Or was it Brooke herself, who finally decided to take control of her career that is hanging on such a thin strand that she thought 1) the denim, assless chaps were just the ticket to finally raise her popularity or 2) she actually thought these things were remotely attractive?

Whatever the case, this is absurd. I’m gonna go laugh at Brooke Hogan some more and then vomit out of utter disgust. And then laugh at her again.