In my never-ending quest to find the best way to retain energy (without doing illegal things) I have stumbled across possibly the most addictive thing ever: caffeinated lip balm.

Invented by “an Alaskan Police Officer, who need[ed] both quality lip balm for the cold and the ability to stay awake during long shifts”, Spazzstick has just recently hit the Internet market.

Simply explaining that the caffeine “absorbs directly into your lips as you use it”, the makers of Spazzstick provide no other information on the website as to how this lip balm—which comes in vanilla, chocolate, mint, and orange flavors—is actually made.

I’m sure you could email them and ask, but I’m perfectly happy to a buy a few sticks of this new product, sans inquiries. I don’t want to know what it’s made of. I just want it’s sweet caffeine to seep directly into my body.

Until they invent a direct IV drip of the stuff into the bloodstream, caffeinated lip balm is my newest quick fix.

I’ll let you know if it works…and if mixing it with Red Bull sends me to the hospital.

Energy drinks.

Most of us have tried them, and some of us have tried them all. Every week another choice seems to pop up, promising everything from a little “oomph” enhancement to a metabolism increase to an “illegal” amount of taste.We swallow them down because we want the boost, not because they taste anything near good, many of us foregoing coffee for a chemical concoction because of it’s supposed higher caffeine content.

Not to disappoint you, but the amount of stimulant in that sugar-and-piss liquid may be lower than its advertisers would have you believe. Read More »

I personally find Redbull and all those other caffeine-boosting carbonated cans of crap disgusting, as far as taste is concerned. I just don’t get the appeal, but in college, it is all the rage, whether we’re determined to party until sunrise or have to cram for a test. I myself admit to doing many a Jaeger bomb on Friday nights until wee hours of the morning.

But after reading Wired.com’s rundown of just what exactly goes into making this stuff, I will definitely not be mixing Redbull with Jaeger again any time soon.

Chock full of ingredients with names I can barely pronounce, here’s what you’re digesting till 4am: Read More »