The recession hasn’t been pretty. It’s annihilated our jobs, put a hold on our affair with Prada shoes, and turned budgeting into an unfortunate obsession. But evidently, it did bring one great thing: free food.
Yup, thanks to the genius and generous marketers at Mars Chocolate, we’ll all be jumping for joy real soon. The “Real Chocolate Relief Act” is here.
Starting this month, and continuing through September, the company will be doling out a quarter-million tasty treats on what they call “Free Chocolate Fridays.” ‘Free’ and ‘chocolate’ in the same sentence? Now that’s something to smile about.
Just register (in two seconds) here and wait for your mouthwatering coupon to arrive. Note: the coupon is not edible. DO NOT EAT THE COUPON. Instead, walk (or sprint) to the nearest drug store, bodega, gas station, etc. to pick out your very own FREE Snickers, Dove Bar, 3 Musketeers – whatever tasty treat you fantasize about (or am I the only one who daydreams about silky, smooth, cocoa-y goodness melting in my mouth?).
Oh, and more good news: this isn’t one of those one-time only things. You can request a coupon every Friday. So get out of bed, sign up for some free chocolate, and wipe that frown off your face. Tomorrow is the weekend and you can celebrate with free effing candy bars!
Life. is. good.
Whether you are preparing for that last final, gearing up for the LSAT, or just trying to get through a Summer course, the time is here (or surely on its way!) when your brain decides to go on vaca and leave you high and dry in the deep, dark stacks of the library. You can try everything – coffee, candy, that Adderol your friend offered to sell you – but none of it will make much of a difference. You’re tired and over it; your time would be better spent taking a nap or enjoying some Sangria on the porch.
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