In April, I made a decision that I knew would undoubtedly change the rest of my college experience: I signed a lease to share a five bedroom duplex with not one, not two, not even three – but a whopping FOUR girls.

I was excited to be living with these girls because although we aren’t the best of friends, we spent the better half of our last year partying at each other’s respective houses and decided that in an effort to make it easier on all of us we’d just… live together. We eliminated the need to sleep on each other’s uncomfortable couches in dirty, beer-stained clothes and brave the BRUTUAL winters to walk home.

Regardless of how fun and exciting this whole idea was, though, I was still scared sh*tless to share my life/belongings/food/drinks with four estrogen-filled, sometimes catty, often-drunk females. We’ve all heard roommate horror stories and let’s face it – with five girls occupying such a small space, I figured The Hills-esque drama was inevitable.

BUT, not to jump the gun (it’s only been about three weeks since we moved in!), things have been great. FABULOUS. I’d even go as far to say that I actually thoroughly ENJOY living with girls – and that having roommates (especially four of them) really has its perks: Read More »

I have this friend and we call him Douche. I’m not exactly sure where the nickname came from. Nothing about Douche is particularly douche-y, except for the fact that the kid can’t seem to hold his liquor (or a coherent conversation after a few drinks). But he is a fun drunk. He’s adventurous, charismatic and oddly charming …even when he is tripping over his own feet and breaking furniture on semi-accident.

I have never found him particularly attractive, but he does have this strange quality about him that makes me feel super comfortable. Besides his occasional drunken sexual advances, he mostly treats me like a little sister (and this includes body slamming me into couches, stealing my cigarettes and calling me affectionate names like “Bitch” and “Asshole”).

Basically, I am completely not attracted to him in a sexual and/or romantic way. But that all changed Friday night when I walked into a mutual friends place to see one of my girls sitting – where else? – on drunken Douche’s lap. Read More »