The Emmy Nominations are out! Go, 30 Rock!

Wanna find a boyfriend? Try these tips…

Bethenny Frankel’s getting her own show!

Watch out, ladies. Amy Winehouse is back on the market!

In case you, too, want the strongest vajayjay.

Awwww.

Then the idiot took the pics to his neighborhood Wal-Mart to get developed. Because why wouldn’t the boyfriend of a millionaire want to get a deal on his digital prints?

And what happened? Obviously, the under-paid employee of America’s most controversial store made extra copies of the pics and is shopping them around to the tabloids. Normally this wouldn’t be a huge deal, except for the fact that the pictures included shots of JL breastfeeding her newborn.

Yup! Another celebrity boob is exposed.

The Spears family and local authorities are looking into this whole scandal, but dirty dudes everywhere (Jamie Lynn is a minor!) are patiently waiting those pics.

Just remember this the next time you want to save a few cents on those pictures of yours; you never can trust the photo dude.

How a boardroom of smart people missed this…I’ll never know

Rambo Reporter: Woman gets shot and keeps on talking

Screamer? You might get fined!

This just in: Facebook might actually help your career

Obama gets hot

Write your paper, toast some bread

That’s right, JLove — fight for acceptance by giving in and getting skinny. That’ll show ‘em

Old guys say the darndest things

You know what “avocado” means, don’t you?

The train never left the station…even though they’re married

So here it is: Casey Aldridge, a.k.a. Little Spears’ Babby-daddy, is either 17, 18 or 19. Unfortunately, white trash don’t keep good records and for some reason there is a some discussion as to how old he is. People are looking at his MySpace page, which has him at 17, and also his old school records that have him at 19. However, the latter records come from his Principal who is trying to hold the school yearbooks to make extra money, so it is about as trustworthy as the Mitchell Report.

My roommate is pre-law, so here is the $.50 tour:

- if he is 17, he is just another genius who knocked up a Spears girl and won the “K-Fed Lottery”

- if he is 18, there are some state statutes that would allow for a 2 year differentiation between consent and statutory rape

- if he is 19, he is f**ked

In most cases, it is up the parents to determine whether or not to press charges. In THIS case however, since the victim is preggers the District Attorney can deem that the “attack” has endangered the victim. So essentially, it doesn’t matter how much the model parenting figures, the Spears adults, protest – Casey could be going away for a while if history repeats itself.

I, for one, am eager to see how this goes because I remember a young man named Genarlow Wilson. His case was a little different because it was a consensual oral sex, which in white trash terms mean that no one got pregnant…ohhhhh yeah…I forgot! Genarlow was black and didn’t hook up with a celebrity. Don’t get me wrong, neither one should spend a minute in jail – but you have to be fair about your treatment.

All this talk aside, the new twist is that they just announced that Casey and Jamie Lynn are getting married. Can’t sue your husband for statutory rape! Ohhhhhhhhh…the American Legal System!

OK! Magazine is reporting that Jamie Lynn Spears, the supposed “good sister” to a psychotic, dramz addicted older sibling, is, as we speak, 16 and pregnant.

Yup. The Nickelodeon star just confirmed to the mag (and subsequently, the world) that she’s got a bun in the oven courtesy of her “live-in” 19-year-old boyfriend, Casey Aldridge.

This is:

A) horrible news… and

B) even more confirmation that the Spears clan drinks a special kind of water spiked with “bad – decisions – that – will – effect – your – entire – life – and – ruin – your – career” vitamins.

While 10pm on a Tuesday night yields no comment from Nickelodeon, one can only assume that an unwed, pregnant teenager is not exactly the kind of role model they’re looking to endorse, and The Littlest Spears is most likely going to get a front row seat to her own career meltdown.

…That is, unless MTV calls her up and asks her to do a reality series.

“Jamie Lynn Spears: My Life As a Stupid, Pregnant Teenager” anyone?