Thank the Lord for “Celebrity Rap Superstar.”

My first viewing was last week; I had seen the commercials and made a solemn oath to avoid this one at all costs. But like Whitney to crack, there I was in front of my television, enjoying the rush of shame and delight that came from my first few moments of CRS.

None of the contestants on the show are legitimately famous. Reality television has produced a mass of “celebrities” that are longing to extend their already used 15 minutes of fame.

There is Jason Wahler of The Hills, who forgot every single lyric during is first performance, making Ashlee Simpson look legitimate. You will laugh, and cringe, and perhaps shed a tear for poor Jason, who takes himself WAY too seriously.

Then of course, there’s the Queen of All Media, Ms. Perez Hilton himself. The nice thing about Perez is that he is actually in on the joke, and makes fun of himself the whole time. He knows he’s a blogger who got lucky, and proceeds to laugh his way to the bank. Perez already has street cred, he doesn’t need to earn it. Read More »

Perez.

He’s done a lot for us over the years. Taking down annoying starlets one vajayjay flash at a time, dragging certain stars out of the closet, giving us up-to-the-minute Lindsay Lohan rehab news, and forcing a bit of humor out of that self-important land called Hollywood.

After learning about his site a year ago, I find myself checking it almost daily, needing my fix of A, B, and C-list celebrities like a smoker needs that after dinner cig.

I can’t help it, Perez and his mysterious “sources” have me hooked.

Starting out from a nobody and becoming a giant somebody isn’t easy, and Perez (a.k.a Mario Armando Lavandeira) has certainly climbed his way from unknown to a celebrity in his own right. That being said, I can’t help but notice the irony of a guy who makes a living bashing the overexposed saturating the media himself.

He’s everywhere now. In magazines, in major newspapers, all over the talk-show circuit, even featured in a hideous-looking new show on MTV called Celebrity Rap Superstars. The man who used to be just like us—a regular person gawking at the famous people—is now more like the celebrities he draws penises on.

Far be it from me to begrudge anyone newfound fame, but you have to wonder what Perez would say about himself on his website. Read More »