10 most embarrassing celebrity yearbook photos.

Chris Brown’s got a new job.

Always wonder what it’s like to work the poll?

Prince Harry just got richer hotter.

Makeup remover pads that actually remove makeup!

Lauren Conrad unveils line for Kohl’s.

Since I tend to write (and speak) about controversial topics, I know what it’s like not to be universally liked.  I suppose that’s what will happen when you publicly hate on flip-flops.  However, I don’t think I could ever sink to the level it takes to be disliked in Hollywood.  I mean, they like everyone there (see: Perez Hilton).  Except, of course, those select few that are so hard to work with and so up their own butts that it’s impossible to like them.

Naturally, that’s what will concern us for this week’s edition of the showdown.

Everyone has heard Christian Bale’s ridiculous outburst on the set of Terminator.  As a  method actor, he can get pretty intense.  I actually respect the lengths he goes through to get into character.  However, I’m pretty sure other actors have managed to get into character without distancing themselves from the cast and crew and blowing up any time someone distracts them.  Except maybe Jeremy Piven.  He’s not exactly a method actor, but he is arrogant and well on his way to being that creepy older guy at Hollywood parties.  It’s hard to compare these two actors, seeing how they operate in two completely separate spheres, but their shared bad reputations require some comments.

Which one is more self-absorbed?  Who pisses off Hollywood the most? Read More »

In my experience, musicians are vain, self-absorbed creatures who live for their instruments (much like any art form).  Since one of my majors is studio art, I am constantly surrounded by self-proclaimed artists and their idiosyncrasies.  Therefore, I can understand why some people in the music business act in a certain way.  They can’t help it, they’re artists!

The art department of any university is a strange place and it takes a special kind if person to put themselves through the torture that is any art class.  I’m sure the music business is the same way.  That is why when I see “artists” like The Pussycat Dolls or P. Diddy, I’m not exactly surprised.  However, once in a while there comes a person who is so terrifically self-absorbed that it shocks (and annoys) even other artists.  Enter:  Kanye West.  And John Mayer.

This installment of Celebretard Showdown could easily be called The Douchebag Edition, considering our subjects.  Who is more pretentious?  Who has talent and who just has a big mouth?  So many questions, so little time (let’s face it: there’s only so much time you can spend reading Kanye West quotes before losing all faith in humanity and wanting to smash something). Read More »

There are a lot of celebrities out there that simply disappear, whether it be voluntarily or due to lack of talent/rehab/Bermuda triangle.  There are a couple that have massive amounts of issues, yet refuse to disappear.  In fact, they seem to pop up everywhere, strutting around uninvited on every red carpet.  People like Bai Ling and Paris Hilton are prime examples.

More recently, we have Mischa Barton.  I gotta admit, I really do enjoy watching a mediocre TV actress fall from grace (and she fell hard!).  Oh, speaking of mediocre actresses, I think I heard the other day that Tara Reid has teamed up with the douchebag powerhouse that is Christian Audigier to design some piece of crap that I’ll certainly see all around campus.  Yay.

In light of that wonderful piece of news, I think it’s time to pair up a couple of the most washed up faces in Hollywood:  Mischa Barton and Tara Reid. Read More »

I am a chronic list-maker, whether I have to make a difficult decision or not.  Lists help me organize my thoughts and remember important facts and details that I need for later.  However, there are some things that I would rather forget and that’s what this week’s showdown concerns.

Celebrity couples are hideous beasts born of the 24-hour news and gossip cycles and there are none more powerful than Brangelina and TomKat.  But which one is worse?  Which one makes you want to throw your TV out the window, turn off your computer, and hide your iPhone just so you never have to hear what ridiculous name they’re giving to their 17th adopted baby?  Such a difficult decision, but we can work through it. Read More »

It seems that every celebrity tries their hand at the retail business. Jennifer Lopez, Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, Beyonce, and more, put out random clothing lines and perfumes every month.

Instead of trusting the business intuition of people who made it big on their ability to look pretty and stand on cue (really – who needs another celebrity perfume??), we decided to make our own list of celebrity products that are more appropriate to the celebrities themselves:

Angelina Jolie Fertility Drugs – When one (or two, or eight) just isn’t enough…

Amy Winhouse Coke Mirrors – Because no one knows lines like Amy.

Britney Spears Electric Razors – Nothing but the best will do to shave your head.

Michael Jackson Boys Underwear – Choosy mothers choose MJ’s (backless) Boys Underwear.

Tom Cruise Couches – Now with sturdier construction and more durable fabric for those days when you just feel like jumping around!

Zac Efron Hair Extensions – The sexy side-swept look will drive the ladies wild!

Kanye West Earplugs – Because people say a lot of stupid sh*t. Read More »

Whenever we need to make a difficult decision, we make a list.

“Gym or TV?”
“Jeans or dress?”
“Save money or buy a new iPhone?”

So when we are constantly faced with the awful decision of which fame whore couple is more fame whorey, we make a list. No, this isn’t Sophie’s choice, but it’s our choice and it’s hard.

Moving on.

This week’s showdown is between two “celebrity” couples that spend their days on the cover of every tabloid on earth. Which couple should have kept the cameras out of their lives? Do we really have to choose?! Read More »

Even though celebrity gossip websites like Perez Hilton and TMZ have become a daily pop-culture bible for some of us, there are always those moments when the internet just will not do. Bringing your laptop to the beach is definitely a no (sand in my precious Mac? Psh, girl, no way), and trying to go online on a plane might get you stuck in a situation like the passengers on Lost (there’s a reason why you need to turn off electronics, after all).

For times like those, magazines are the way to go (plus, who doesn’t like perfume samples and grocery coupons?). But you don’t want to waste your money on just any magazine; you want the one that will give you the most (gossip) bang for your buck.

So which ones are best? I scoured the grocery store check-out aisles for candy bars the top dogs in gossip magazines and here are my rankings: Read More »

If it’s two things I love it’s ripped jeans and the Kid’s Choice Awards.

Random I know, but my mom never let me buy ripped jeans saying she wasn’t going to “spend money on something that was already ruined,” and that “ripped jeans are for homeless people.” Now that I’m on my own, I’ve found that there is actually ONE perk of being financially independent and that would be ripped, torn and tattered jeans. Take that, mommy dear.

Second, I know I’m way to old to care about the Kid’s Choice Awards, but – call me a teenybopper or call me a loser – there is just something a lot more fun (like, um, the goo that gets dumped on celebs) than your typical stuffy awards shows.

So it makes perfect sense that I hearted Cameron Diaz’s look at this year’s Kid’s Choice Awards. She looked cute, fresh and not at all like a homeless person.

For those of you who aren’t into watching programs that 10 year olds watch, I’ve broken it down for you here.

Celebrity Chic on the Cheap: Cameron Diaz is All Torn Up
Read More »

While there are definitely tons of perks that come with being a celebrity, like the money, nice clothes, and invites to awesome Hollywood parties (to name just a few), fame also has its drawbacks.

Like the paps.

Being a mere mortal, I love the freedom I have of being able to go out of my house in sweatpants and no makeup without fear that an unflattering picture of it would show up online later that day, followed closely by the rag mags discussing my cellulite, my hair and my major fashion Don’t.

And I don’t even want to think of having to deal with my personal life in front of the world. After watching the media frenzy surrounding Lindsay and Sam’s recent breakup, I have really started to feel bad for our little LiLo. I know she’s sort of an attention whore (with a laundry list of issues), but the absolute last thing I’d want to deal with after a big break-up is constant media attention.

Just imagine what it would be like to have to deal with a heartbreaking break up while the world was watching your every move. Would you want the paparazzi swarming you when you’re walking to class in baggy sweats, no makeup, and puffy eyes from crying? Or have photos taken of you while you stock up on cookie dough and Doritos to numb the pain of a broken heart? I know I’d like to avoid any and all photos when I spontaneously burst into tears at the mere mention of beer (“OMG MY EX LOOOOVED BEEEEEEER. Waaaaah”).  Read More »