Sunbathing is not my friend

The sun and I have been having an ongoing battle for as long as I can remember. I’m all, like, “please make me so brown that no one can tell my original race,” and the sun is all, like, “I’m going to fry you until people mistake you for an over-sized lobster.” (I should also mention at this point that I was born with claws and a meaty tail.)

It’s not like I haven’t tried to compromise with the sun. I mean I’ve gone as far as to wear SPF 90 on any days when the forecast gives less than a 100 percent chance of rain. I walk on the shady side of the street on the way to work and I always wear white t-shirts on all the slides at the water parks. All I’m asking for in return is a 3-month hiatus from my lifelong case of albino-ism.

This past weekend was the first really nice weekend in New York City. It was around 70, which meant that I was trading in my boots for flats. And unfortunately for my eyes, it meant the tourists were trading in their I LOVE NY shirts for ill-fitting rompers and aqua socks. I, being the perpetual optimist (that was my middle school screen name, perpetualoptimist69), applied my facial sunscreen, grabbed a blanket, and headed for the park in an attempt to tan. Read More »

I imagine what the MTV production meeting looked like before tonight’s episode of The City was planned.

“Hey guys. We totally effed up on the drama factor by letting Whit and Jay get together so quickly. Let’s introduce some new characters….er….invite more ‘real people’ in so we can have new dramz. Oh, and let’s make sure to make everyone meet up in the park to discuss their issues. Letting it all happen in their apartments is boring.”

Seriously – the episode was boring. I barely cared about the Jay shiz and now they want me to care about some not-so-cute model and her douchey boyfriend? Not only do I not know this girl, but her situation isn’t nearly as fun to watch as Audrina and Justin Bobby, so why should I care?

Yes, it sucks to see some chick get her heart broken when her BF has guy night at a strip club and some girl (who was at the strip club, why?) ends up maybe making out with him. And, yes, it was kinda funny to watch her BF try to warn her of the sitch while driving her home from the airport (“I love you so much. I love you. Did you talk to Whitney?”).

But I don’t care.

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Listen up fellas!! It is National Men Make Dinner Day…so get your cute butts to cookin’.

The Brazilian wax never goes out of style.

Sarah Silverman’s boy toy, Jimmy, exposes Sarah’s past.

Buckle down the hatches…A storm is coming!

The election is now over (thank goodness)…so here is a 50% sale on Obama goodies!

There is nothing like running freely through Central Park with it all hanging out. Thanks Steve Guttenberg for the visual.

Is the person sitting next to you on the airplane driving you crazy? Well, just duct tape her down, duh!

Dying to play the new Left 4 Dead game? The demo will be out tomorrow. Game on!

Photo courtesy of photobucket.com

The few days or weeks after finals can be such a relief from those seven or ten days of straight stress that you really don’t want to do anything. Being home feels so much better than being cooped up in your dorm room – at least for a little while, until your family reminds you why you left for school in the first place and the only real comfort you have is your pets.

And sure, you have stuff planned for the summer…but have you been outside recently? On most of the upper east coast, it’s far from summer. Heck, it still feels like March every now and then. So what to do? Here a few things that should spark your imagination, whether you have plans or not.

Unpack your stuff! I know this should seem like a common sense thing…but I haven’t yet, really, and I know people who leave their stuff in boxes for the better portion of the summer. Really, it’s easy and it gives you a little sense of accomplishment.

Hit the town! I know situations vary for everyone, but my school is in the middle of nowhere and I live just a trainride away from the city that never sleeps. Whether you’re window shopping, clubbing with buddies, or just taking a stroll in Central Park, it’s nice to remind yourself that there are places outside your campus. (And please, ladies, if you live near your campus…don’t go walking through it. That’s cheating.) Read More »

Apparently, the Today show is a Flavor of the Week hotspot for people looking to make the most of their 15 minutes. This week: the girl who got booted off a plane for looking like a ho. The last line of the story will surely shock you. (NBC)

Call me crazy but every time one of these “foreign objects in my body” stories pops up I just can’t understand how you don’t notice…I just can’t. (BBC News)

If you ever come to New York and decide to drop 55 bucks to have a smelly horse drag you around Central Park while a creepy man in a top hat tries to make conversation…just know what you’re contributing to. (WCBS)

If you’re anything like me and find that every frat party has the same douche-y playlist (not to mention the guys or the booze), here are some alternatives that just may keep everyone happy. (Blender)

“MonaVie costs $40 a bottle, and you can’t get it in stores; it’s marketed only through the company’s network of thousands of individuals who sell it out of their homes.”…um, I’m scared. What’s that? Oprah endorses it? Sold! (reveries.com)