- Reruns of Home Improvement took me back to the days when it was the only show my mom would let me stay up to watch because of my borderline unhealthy crush on JTT.
- My mom sent me some old family photos, including one of me donning a skort. When it was cool.
- And my roommate reminding me of the days when you had to hear that obnoxious dial-up tone just to get some awesome IM chat time on AOL.

Ahhh…the good ol’ days.

Now are the days of so-called “adulthood,” when mom no longer is in charge of selecting and purchasing your wardrobe (the purchasing part I didn’t mind so much…) and you are now responsible for updating your wardrobe with the latest trends every season by yourself.  The internet is now available everywhere (well, mostly) without that obnoxious dial-up tone, so that’s cool, but unless you are lucky enough win one, you have to actually purchase your own computer? What the eff?

And what’s this I hear about books being old news?

And don’t even get me started on the guy front. Who woulda thunk we’d actually be turning to guys for love advice? I mean, what happened to the days of sleepovers and gushing over some stupid note your crush passed you? Now, we are bombarded with where to meet guys, how to meet guys, wah wah wah. Between the dating scene and what alcoholic beverage I should down first, being grown up is exhausting!

Ugh. I never thought I’d say this, but I’m totes missing the days of math homework and skorts.

OMG. How many times have you seen this in your life? There should be a law against moms using IMs. Or any technology for that matter.

]]> http://collegecandy.com/2009/08/09/and-this-is-why-moms-should-not-use-the-internet/feed/ 18 ccandystaff wtf mom emoticons http://collegecandy.com/2009/04/20/how-not-facebook-etiquette/ http://collegecandy.com/2009/04/20/how-not-facebook-etiquette/#comments Mon, 20 Apr 2009 20:00:49 +0000 Kathryn S http://www.collegecandy.com/?p=15711 ]]> I don’t know about you, but Facebook has gradually begun to take over my life over the past few years. It’s getting to the point where I think in third person, a la the Facebook status: “Kathryn is really stressed about her class schedule this spring.” “Kathryn is annoyed with bad drivers who slow her down.” “Kathryn really needs to get laid.” See? Now that last one would be inappropriate.

It’s hard, because I usually use FB to communicate with close friends who may have moved far away since our glory days as high school minors, and I often forget that I have a few hundred random people who really DON’T need to know my personal details. So, fellow collegiates, the next time you sit down and log in, take some of the following factors into consideration and reconfigure your FB behavior.

1. Poking is not a form of flirtation.

WTF? It’s a poke. It’s been around since the birth of Facebook, and it’s never made any sense. Maybe years ago, when FB was a baby, it was funny to have an online program that allowed you to “poke” people, but now, it’s played out. What comes from the poke? One of two things: The ignored poke, which will make you feel uber lame, or the “poke back.” And what comes from that?

2. “Gifts” are not actually gifts.

Whenever a free gift pops up, I think of a reason to send it to my cousin (who may or may not actually be my fraternal twin). However, spending $1 on a graphic is just lame. Especially when they sell out. HELLO! Virtual icons cannot sell out, because they don’t actually exist!!!! So, instead of spending a dollar to send your BFF a cartoon teddy bear, or your crush a virtual pair of panties as a sorry way to flirt, save your money and buy something that can be wrapped.

3. Your status does not need to reflect your deepest feelings, and does not need to be updated more than once a day.

I’m guilty of this one. But it’s true. FB statii have become the new away message. But in the third person. So you can’t even put up a (so you think) meaningful quote without saying something to the effect of “CJ says, in the words of Shakespeare, ‘The Lunatic, the lover, and the poet are of imagination all compact.” It’s effing Facebook. No need to go poetic. Besides, you have limited space, so you may not even be able to say everything you want to… which is a blessing in disguise.

4. You don’t need to attempt to FB chat with someone just because you don’t know their screen name.

There are loads of people who don’t even know how to work the FB chat, so chances are, you’ll send a “Hiiii! You there?!?” message that will never be returned. You’ll feel awkward, and who knows if the person on the receiving end will even get it. Unless you have successfully FB chatted with someone in the past, I highly suggest refraining from initiating the catch-up convo in this manner. Especially when you’re drunk.

Seriously, when you’re drunk, just leave the Facebook chat alone. Really. Please.

5. There is no reason to spend more time on Facebook than on your studies.

Well, besides the fact that profile updates are more entertaining than the history of the Civil War. But do you really want to be that person who is ALWAYS online? Go take a walk, go to the gym, hell, have some face-to-face interaction with someone!

6. Know your privacy settings. And even if you do, proceed with caution.

Over the past few years, several news stories have broken out in regards to people whose lives have been ruined due to Facebook and Myspace content. Teachers who post pics with a beer in their hand are fired, high school kids with less-than-scholarly profiles have been denied college admission. You know it. If you have party pics online, set your profile to private. You might even want to block certain people from certain photo albums. Just keep in mind that you might not even remember some of the people that you added months ago, whom you might not want to let into your personal life.

I’m in a fight with Facebook. First they opened the doors to every crazy person on the planet/your mom. Then they started telling you everything your “friends” were doing. Then they started recommending friends to you, even though you would already have those people as friends if you wanted to.

And now those crazy boys at Facebook are stirring the pot again. This time with Facebook chat.

When I first signed in and noticed the yellow informational box in the lower right corner of my homepage I didn’t really think much of it. I actually got kind of excited. A more efficient way to talk crap about people’s profiles/relationship status with my friends; sign me up!

But then I actually starting playing around with the new feature and I found myself very, very scared. Facebook has taken away yet another layer of my privacy!

If telling the world when I change my profile picture or add a new favorite book is not invasive enough, this new chat feature tells all my “friends” when I am signed into FB. One of the greatest features of Facebook is the ability to look in on other people’s lives (read: stalk) in privacy. At any time of day. With no one else ever knowing. Now, people will be able to see me getting my Facebook fix before work. Or during lunch. Or when I can’t sleep in the middle of the night. And they can bother me! What if I want to see who my ex boyfriend is currently dating in peace!?

Sure, this new chat thing will make it much easier to flirt with that hot guy from your English class (because sending messages takes too long and writing on his Wall is far too public for the things you want to say), but I am just not sure the benefits outweigh my desire to peruse privately. I am not giving up on Facebook just yet, but if and when they start showing who viewed your profile, we are D-U-N-Z-O. Let’s hope Mr. Zuckerberg has a bit more sense than that.

AIM, with its elaborate sound effects and cutesy but cluttered design, has lost its appeal for me. There was a time when I, like many of my friends, left AIM constantly signed on, just in case some crucial or exciting message might pop up unexpectedly. But over time, the many irritations of AIM began to wear on me. I signed on less and less frequently, and eventually not at all.

Those advertisements at the top of the buddy list window would make loud and abrupt noises out of nowhere, which freaked me out. I’m through spending hours meticulously crafting witty away messages or tweaking my profile, and I’m definitely through reading other people’s away messages and profiles. The internet has come a long way, and there are far better ways to kill time. Like Facebook. Also, in the many long years I’ve been using AIM, I have acquired a lot of “buddies”. A lot of random buddies, many of whom I no longer care to chat with. It’s so awkward when some long lost acquaintance I occasionally partied with during my senior year of high school wants to kill time by IMing me. I have nothing to say, but at the same time, how can I blow someone off when we haven’t spoken in three or four years?

And then there was the issue of screen names. When I created my most recent AIM screen name (wildhoneypie07, in case you’re wondering), it was totally clever and cute, a fusion of a nickname and an inside joke, plus the year I could one day expect to graduate from college. Now, though, as a recent college graduate, it just seems silly and embarrassing.

Gchat, on the other hand, is so sleek, so streamlined, so…mature. Since it’s integrated into your email, it doesn’t seem childish and desperate to leave it open most of the time. Plus, it looks more professional if you’re pretending to work while chatting. And instead of pictures of post-it notes to indicate an away message and Zzz’s when someone is idle, Gchat gives me a simple green dot, orange dot, red dot, or grey dot to represent online, idle, busy, or offline.

We use our real names now, instead of silly nicknames, so you always know exactly who you’re talking to. Since Gmail is fairly new, all of your contacts are current and relevant people you actually want to talk to. And lest you think Gchat is all work and no play, the adorable emoticons do a cute little trick where they flip right side up and sometimes color themselves in.

Now if only Gchat would add a chatroom option and get rid of that creepy “chat history” feature, I’d be in chatting heaven. Just remember to go “off the record” before any potentially incriminating chats.