Ask Tuffy Luv. If you dare. TuffyLuv@collegecandy.com

Dear Tuffy Luv,
It’s my freshman year of college and I started spending a lot of time with this boy on my floor. By a lot I mean we stay up until 3 a.m almost every night talking and he comes over to my room unannounced just to hangout, he texts me on weekends after I’ve gone out to hangout, and he flirts with me on the regular. Needless to say, I like him. The only issue is he has a girlfriend. They have been dating for 2+ years and she is still in high school, a junior to be exact.

One weekend (with a little too much alcohol in my system) I told him how I felt, and he replied by telling me he liked me but was still in love with his girlfriend and he could not break up with her. Two nights later while he was intoxicated, he loudly announced to the room how attractive I was, and that he would like to spend the night in my room. We talked about both nights and he said he would rather us just be friends and forget any of our conversations about liking each other ever happened. I am not sure what to make of this. Things cooled down for a few weeks but he is starting to spend a lot of time with me again. It’s hard to think about when his girlfriend comes to visit or he goes home for the weekend.

I think I am the better fit for him right now – he is in college and needs a more mature girlfriend – but I can’t tell him that without harming our friendship so I try to be supportive. But it sucks. Should I just move on or tell him how I feel (again)?

Please help,
I Do it Better Than Her Read More »

2010 was a year of infinite life lessons, courtesy of celebrities everywhere and impeccable tabloid coverage. Whether you realized it or not, high-profile snafus paved the way for your own indiscretions- showing you what works…and what’ll land you on the cover of Us Weekly next to a salacious headline.

Feel like you missed the message in some of the more important low points of the year?  Well pay attention, because here’s a cheat sheet on cheating…and lying…and boozing…and… Read More »

Got a question? Ask Tuffy Luv. TuffyLuv@collegecandy.com

Dear Tuffy Luv,

A few weekends ago while my roommate/best friend was passed out in her bedroom, her boyfriend and I hooked up. The boy and I had been friends freshman year, and I had feelings for him before he started dating my best friend. He and I agreed that it was never going to happen again and to not tell anyone. Two days later, when we were both drunk, it happened again. I believe he is a good person, and loves his girlfriend so I told him I wasn’t going to say anything.

2 weeks later he tried to hook up with my best friend and my other roommate. She rejected him, but told me the story. Selfishly, I don’t want to tell my best friend, but at the same time I wonder if I was wrong about him, and he is hooking up with other girls. What do I do?

– Sex With Best Friend’s Boyfriend Read More »

Dear Dude,

I’ve been dating my boyfriend for a little over a year and a half. Four years ago he had a friend that he fooled around with but they  never dated (he wanted to, she didn’t). From what he has told me about the situation, it seems like she was emotionally toying with him (hooking up with other guys and whatnot) but they  were still friends till she transfered to another school end of freshman year.

I found out that a month or so in when we started dating that she was visiting the area and he went to have lunch with her. He told me this and all was okay. Last May (about a year after this lunch date) I unfortunately came across an IM exchange they had (my boyfriend was drunk) and through it found out that they were playing around with the idea of hooking up but ended up not because they were both in relationships. After that IM exchange, which was timestamped a few days after they went to lunch, I saw that between then and the date that I found it, they had spoken once or twice–neither time which she replied back.

I confronted him and told him what I read. Although he was angry, he fessed up to it all and reinforced that nothing physical happened (except a peck when they left). He said he needed that for closure, and since then our relationship has blossomed into something I enjoy. Which is where it gets me–our relationship is great. I trust that he has let go of her but I still have these bouts of anxiety where I remember the time that he emotionally cheated on me, and how betrayed I felt.

Anyway, after that long rant I just want to know how I can ease my worries. We have grown together a lot, and we are open with each other, but I can’t help but think how she may still be in the back of his mind or how another lunch date may occur without me knowing, or how he still may have feelings for her. Would it be too much to ask for him to not speak to her anymore just to be sure?

Thanks Dude,
Feeling Worried Read More »

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Leave your questions at the beep. BEEETuffyLuv@collegecandy.comEEEP!

Dear Tuffy Luv,

3 months ago, I ended a 3.5 year relationship. 3 weeks later, I jumped back on the horse, hoping just to get some rebound action. I met an incredible guy who embodied everything I ever wanted: he’s the smartest guy I’ve ever met, he makes me laugh harder than anyone ever has, and our chemistry is off the charts. 2 weeks later we were “official.” But things got out of hand quickly. We began fighting over petty things via text message and eventually decided that it just wasn’t working. So we dropped our “official” title, and decided to be “friends.”

But we continued going on dates, having sleep overs and hooking up. And fighting via text. He maintained that we couldn’t be in a relationship, because neither of us was ready. But we were ACTING like we were in a relationship, so when he didn’t invite me to his birthday party, I was crushed. I took that to mean that all deals were off, and out of spite I hooked up with a guy at some kegger. On his birthday.

The next day, I was honest with him about what happened. And just like that, our “friendship” was severed. He blew up on me for “cheating” and told me the reason he didn’t invite me to his birthday was because he thought having me there would distract him from playing host. I can’t tell if this is bullsh*t or not.

My friends all tell me that they’re proud I’m rid of him, and that he was an a-hole undeserving of me. But I miss the guy. So what do I do? Is this something that can even be fixed? How can I know if this is even worth fixing?

Help Me, Tuffy Luv.

-Sort-of-cheater Read More »

Okay, so our generation has received a lot of flack for not being able to form real, long-lasting relationships, thanks to technology and archaic dating rules about college that span from the 1500′s. But here at CollegeCandy, we’d like to give a big smooch of thank you to the politicians who have set the standard for the foundation of great relationships. It’s people like them that give us faith that men can be intelligent, sexy, and cheaters – a three in one. In light of the accusations Al Gore has currently received, here are the 5 lessons these politicians have taught us in love, life and relationships. Thanks, ya’ll.

John Edwards: Keep everything under wraps, I mean everything. Totally okay to be having other relationships, just gotta make sure your significant other doesn’t know about it. I mean, the baby.

Mark Sanford: When married life gets tough, go to an exotic place to relax, unwind and meet the love of your live. Just don’t tell everyone and vanish in plain sight. It’s sooo mysterious and just plain sexy.

Larry Craig: Don’t let jet lag take the spice out of your love life. Take advantage of unique situations, like the ability to hook up in airport bathrooms. It’s convenient and adventurous – knock two birds with one stone.

Al Gore: Don’t let a sexual moment slip you by! Take a moment to appreciate the fact that someone is touching your naked body. Do them a favor and touch them back.

Elliot Spitzer. Having trouble meeting people? Have no fear, for $10K a night, you could have a companion to eat dinner with, talk to, and you know, do other stuff.

Hugs and kisses, these politicians sure have taught us valuable lessons in life and in love.

Thanks to Jezebel for keeping us up-to-date on how Al Gore destresses when saving the world gets too overwhelming.

I am so sick and tired of hearing about Jesse James trying to apologize and make up excuses for why he decided to cheat on Sandra Bullock, America’s favorite sweetheart. It’s bad enough that he cheated on Sandy with multiple women, but the fact that he’s going to the media (i.e People Magazine, Nightline) and explaining what prompted him to cheat (apparently his Dad was abusive to him as a child) just proves that he needs to grow a pair and be held solely responsible for his actions.

During his Nightline interview, James explained that one of the main reasons he cheated on Sandy was because as a child, his father was emotionally and physically abusive to him, going as far as breaking his arm and beating him. Although I do think abuse is an extremely touchy subject and it would be stupid to make up stories about abuse, I don’t even know what to believe anymore. Here, the fault lies in not only James but also Nightline. By granting him an interview and allowing him to share his side of the story, the public is encouraged to sympathize with him and maybe even give him a free pass for his infidelities. It’s a win-win situation for both sides: Nightline gets the viewership and publicity of the interview and James gets more coverage and money in return.

Abuse or not, what people need to understand is that Jesse James initially made a vow to Sandra Bullock during their marriage and he was the one who chose to sleep with Bombshell McGee (the tattooed up adultress who, in desire for her 15 minutes of fame, blabbed her big mouth to the world). At the end of the day, by excusing his “transgressions” (ha!) to his father’s abuse, James is the coward copping out and not stepping up to his own responsibilities.

The same can be said for Lindsay Lohan, the actress we all love to hate. Lohan, who once used to be one of Hollywood’s most sought out actresses, is now a hot tranny mess who is shamefully wearing her SCRAM ankle bracelet. Many people blame her parents for her derailment, but honestly, she’s the one snorting all the coke and downing Vodka like it’s water. Lohan should really be taking advice from Drew Barrymore, who, after her stints in rehab and failed marriages, is now Hollywood’s Golden Girl.

Sucky parents or not, celebrities in the likes of James and Lohan need to realize that for all that they’re given in the world – a life of fame, luxury and money – they need to step up and seriously take some personal responsbilities to their action. I absolutely do not feel sorry for James and hope that he locks him and his junk away from the rest of the world and becomes eternally miserable for cheating on Miss Congeniality.

Suck it Jesse.

[It's pretty obvious that the average CollegeCandy reader has some very strong opinions. Opinions that she likes to share with everyone on the site. We love a strong woman (unless she happens to be charging at us with her fists raised), so we thought we'd give her a real forum to discuss her thoughts, feelings, and perspectives. Every Friday I'll be featuring a hot topic (like botox! ) and leaving it up to you, the readers, to duke it out. So, read it and get your debate on in the comments section below!]

Cheating has always been, will always be, a touchy subject. We’ve debated what cheating is, whether you should forgive a cheater, but now it’s time to turn those sneers inward and ask the dirty little question – what if you cheat? (BF DISCLAIMER: This is all totally hypothetical, I promise!) There seems to be a little dissent about whether or not (assuming you don’t get caught) you should confess that you cheated and I think it’s time we got a consensus.

On the one hand – you cheated! Of course you should tell you significant other and take your lumps. Part of being in a grown up relationship (or even a not so grown up one) is being honest with each other and being able to trust that no matter what happens you will deal with it together. Admittedly, this would totally suck if you were the one who had to go begging for forgiveness, and there is a chance that the whole thing will fall apart because of your confession, but otherwise you’re basically forcing yourself and your SI to live a lie. Read More »