21 Ways to be a Gentleman in the 21st Century

gentleman 2As I was exploring the joys of StumbleUpon with a good guy friend of mine, I happened upon this site: the 21 ways to be a gentlemen.

Seriously, click that link and read it. Then join me as I ask, “Um, really?” The list is chock full of some pretty asinine and totally dated characteristics of a “gentleman.”

A gentleman eats the garnish on his dinner plate if he so desires? Waits until a lady at the table lifts her fork before he takes his first bite?

Yeah, I don’t think so.

I’ve decided to revamp this list of 21 ways to be a gentleman, geared toward your typical college bro. Chivalry might be dead and douche bags abound on every campus, but these 21 rules shouldn’t be too hard to follow. Read More »

Sexy Time: Dating Disasters

baddate.jpg[For many of us, sex and college go together like Uggs and snow - you can’t have one without the other. So, we brought in one of Berkeley’s finest sex columnists, Elizabeth, to start a dialogue about the topic (and act) that is very near and dear to our hearts. Every Thursday she will get your day goin’ with a little somethin’ somethin’ that’s on her mind.]

I am the queen of terrible dates. Good or bad, I’ve always been the girl that “gives him a chance (or two)” often to a fault. After losing some blood, skin, and half of a tooth on my last date (no lie, I can’t make up stuff this good), I decided that enough is enough. No other girl should have to go through the pain of being toothless for two weeks during finals – it’s just wrong.

As a result, I’ve put together a survival guide to navigate you through the three most painful date scenarios you may ever encounter.

1. He wants to pregame with you – before your date.

There is nothing wrong with having a little somethin’ somethin’ before a date, but a trashed date should be a red flag. There are three things that go really well with heavy intoxication: vomit, awkward hook-ups, and injury. Ironically, these are three things clash with dates like Crocs with…anything. So what do you do if your date downs three long islands by the time you order your appetizers? First and foremost, I hope you didn’t wear heels since you will be walking all night thanks to Drunky Danny. If you made the fatal mistake of wearing heels, do not under any circumstances accept any sort of offer from your date to carry you home. Believe me, there is more than one muscle that gets weaker upon intoxication, which may cause him to severely overestimate his strength. Other than that, you can’t really do anything other than put his drunk ass to bed, run home as fast as you can, and never go out with that guy ever again. Read More »

Candy Dish: Hell Has Frozen Over

heidilaurenhugging1.jpgLauren Conrad and Heidi HUG IT OUT?!

JC Penney is gettin’ cute!

Is Beyonce trying out for Divas on Ice?

Romance makes us barf (sometimes).

Justin Timberlake: Vote in a Box

7 fashion rules every lady should break.

Funny woman, Amy Sedaris, is getting her own show!

Salma Hayek’s baby will never go hungry.

Election rap battle.

Please God, let this end with Spencer’s head in that bucket.

Miley Cyrus finished her autobiography. Because 15 years takes so long to cover.

Don’t forget to watch the final presidential debate tonight!

A**holes Finish First

540163812_300680ffd7.jpgIf there’s one thing I’ve learned in the last four years, it’s this: Girls. Dig. A**holes.

Seriously. There are a lot of us who actually ENJOY meeting – and dating – this special breed of douche.

Okay. I might be EXTREMELY overgeneralizing here, but I have seen a wide range of chicks fall for guys who treat them like absolute sh*t. I’ve seen girls who stick with their sub-par lovers for years and can’t give you a straight answer as to why they put up with it.

I probably fall into this category as well; nice guys like me all the time, yet I constantly shy away from them in favor of their more dramatic/mysterious/douchebag-y counterparts.

This might be like flossing a dead horse – or watching a Tina Fey as Sarah Palin SNL skit (again, not that I’m complaining!), but seriously, why the hell do nice guys finish last? And whose fault is it, really?

A few of my theories : Read More »

He Said/She Said: Paying on the First Date

first-date.pngPicking up the tab on the first date is always an awkward moment. Do you offer? Do you just sit there looking around the room and wait for him to take it? What do your actions say about you as a person? In this week’s He Said/She Said, we dive into first date etiquette. Who should be grabbing their wallet?

He Said:

Paying on the first date is completely inconsequential to me. I seriously don’t care. If I asked you out, then me paying makes sense to me, based only on logic. However, if she wants to pay, that’s fine, too. It doesn’t make me feel like any less of a man. Especially if I’ve somehow tricked some super-employed high powered lady into dating me (bonus!).

What I really hate is games being played with money/forced confusion. Read More »

Super Hot Guy Leaves The Bachelorette: Good Riddance

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Last night’s episode of The Bachelorette took us on a whirlwind trip across the country so DeAnna could see the boys on their hometurf.For the most part, everyone stayed true to form.

Jesse met DeAnna in Breckenridge CO and took her snowboarding. He is moving his relationship with DeAnna along at a snail’s pace kissing her only once so far. In the preview for next week’s episode, it looks like he won’t spend the night in a fantasy sweet with her unless he meets her dad first. Chivalry is great and all but this is a dating reality show. This just in Jesse: The rest of the boys are putting out.

Next we went to Dallas to ride motorcycles with Jeremy. He was still stiff and surprisingly reserved. A multiple choice for you:

The most awkward part of Jeremy’s hometown date was:

a. When his brother’s gave DeAnna the fifth degree

b. When he read the journal entry he wrote the day before his mother’s death

c. When all anyone could talk about over dinner was dead parents

d. All of the above Read More »

Hangover Chronicles 2: Top 5 Worst Things That Happened Last Night

hangover1.jpgYou know those mornings. The ones when you and your girlfriends gather from your various places of shacking over lots of water and ibuprofen to remind each other of the hilarity that went down the night before. Amid all of the laughter (and reviewing of pictures….to jog your memory), you suddenly realize just what happened: the worst thing ever. And it was horrible. And it may or may not have been one of these:

5. A lost wallet and/or clutch. This is particularly disturbing because it is usually the first thing that hits you in the morning, well before you’ve had any time to nurse the hangover you earned. It feels very similar to being on a deserted island that smells strongly of vodka and lime. You are cell-less, cutting off contact with the outside world. With credit card whereabouts unknown and no proof of identity, you are left defenseless against fraud. If you are underage, there is the heavy burden of finding a new fake i.d. The brand new lip gloss and powder from MAC that you inevitably JUST bought are gone forever. Worst of all, your dear, loyal, and perfectly fashionable clutch will never be wedged into your armpit for pictures or table dancing ever again. R.I.P. Limited edition Coach Python and Boucle clutch. You will be missed.

4. The guy you went home with. Okay, last night this guy was h-o-t! He was witty and charming and so attentive to your needs; not once did he let you have an empty glass! Whether you met him at the pre-party, the bar, or on the way home (never a good sign), this dude – who seemed like a great idea at the time – is now nothing more than a big (or worse, tiny) mistake. Often, this error in judgment will use trickery and promises of rides on his family’s yacht to get you home with him, but come morning all he can offer is a ride home…if you’re lucky. High-tail it out of there and head to the nearest health clinic to make sure all he has given you is a bad memory. Read More »

Chivalry is Dying…And WE Are Killing It.

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Once upon a time, long after the feminist revolution dawned and yet before we could spell the word–let alone understand it–we were little girls. We knew we were equals to boys and no one was going to tell us we weren’t going to play kickball at recess with the toughest of them.

But if little Johnny knocked me over and didn’t stop to smile and help me up, well, then I told all of my friends he was a jerk. And this idea of “I’m as good as you so treat me like a princess” found itself a little home in our confused minds and it took over…without an invitation.

As we awkwardly tiptoed into the land of dating, this entire concept, fraudulent as it seems, was still very real. I’ve always been independent, strong, confident, smart (maybe a little full of myself, too), and was taught to believe that no guy could outdo me in ANYthing. So why did my mom tell me to let Eric pay for dinner on my first date? Why did my friends think it was “sweet” that he opened doors for me? How can we truly be equals if chivalry is still a card in this game? Read More »

Will He Hold the Door, Or Elbow You in the Face?

polite man

Chivalry is not dead. It’s alive and well—or, at least alive.Since moving to New York, I have come across varying degrees of gallantry. Some is well intentioned and friendly; while some has a faded, slightly sour quality. Some acts of chivalry are carried out with genuine kindness, and some are done because the guy can’t bare the thought of letting a woman exert any kind of power.

How do you know what level of chivalry you’re getting on a daily basis? Read on.

LEVEL 1: On this, the brightest and friendliest level, the guy is being polite and helpful because he wants to be. Opening a door for you, standing up so you can take his seat on the subway, giving you room to pass on the sidewalk, all of these things are done with a smile and a pleasant glance. This guy’s mama taught him well, and it’s no trouble at all for him to show women that he holds them in high esteem.

Although it’s rare, this level does indeed exist, and I recommend immediately inquiring if such a polite lad has a partner, and if finding him to be single, snatching him up as quick as possible. Read More »

“You ate the food. You drank the wine. Pay the bill.”

restaurant check

I’m a sucker for acts of chivalry, however contrived they may be. Opening doors, pulling out chairs, offering his jacket on a cold evening, and yes, paying for dinner—it all makes me swoon.

Though I never agree on first date to a place where I can’t afford to pay my own way, I do firmly believe that whoever does the asking out should pay. Being the introvert that I am, this translates into my date always paying. But of course, not wanting to seem unappreciative, I always end up doing what my friends and I now refer to as “the fake purse-reach.”

As soon as the bill lands on the table, I reach into my purse and dig for my wallet, which is usually lying in a prominent location that requires no digging to reach. At this point, my date will usually offer an ardent “No, no, I’ve got it.” You know how it goes, ladies. I offer a “oh, no, please, let me at least pay my share,” while opening my wallet and casually taking out bills. My date protests once again, and I wrinkle my brow and say “Are you sure? Thank you so much!” Read More »